Can anyone think of anymore? And better still, does anyone have the answers? If your named Will and you are in the army do you get worried when people say fire at will? Have you ever noticed that if you rearranged the letters in mother in law, they come out to Woman Hitler? Do they put underwear on corpses? Why do people say "The alarm just went off" when really it just came on? If a vampire were Jewish would his Sabbath start at sunrise? Why do child labor laws not prohibit children from acting in movies? If your eyes are crossed, do your tears fall straight? If a stripper gets breast implants can she write it off on her taxes as a business expense? Is the vice president's wife called the second lady? Do you wake up or open your eyes first? Why is it called a soap opera when nobody sings? Can an unborn baby fart or burp? If a General is a higher ranking officer than a Major, then why is a major illness worse than a general illness? Why is there never a full English dinner or tea but there is always a full English breakfast? When an atheist swears on a Bible before they testify in court do they have to tell the whole truth and nothing but the truth since they don't believe in God? Why does the Easter bunny carry eggs? Rabbits don't lay eggs. How come only your fingers and toes get wrinkly in the shower and nothing else does? Doesn't a lightning rod on top of church show a lack of faith? How do "do not walk on grass" signs get there? What was Captian Hook's name before he had a hook for a hand?" Do bald people get dandruff? Can a person with no ears wear glasses? If someone's peeing and halfway through they die, would they keep pissing or stop? Do Jewish vampires avoid crosses or Stars of David? Why is it that when adults have multiple personalities it's schizophrenia, but when a child has imaginary friends it's cute? If you swallow a burp does it turn into a fart? Can you put a gay man in a straight jacket? Do they have burglar alarms at Christian bookstores? Why do bullies always ask "whatâs your problem" when they're obviously not going to solve it? Do stairs go up or down? When people say, "Iâm so tired it's not even funny" or "my head hurts so much it's not even funny", why would it even be funny in the first place? Do coffins have lifetime guarantees? Can you make a candle out of your earwax? When French people swear do they say pardon my English? Aren't the 'good things that come to those who wait' just the leftovers from the people that got there first? Can you breathe out of your nose and mouth at the same time? Do illiterate people get the full effect of Alphabet soup? Why is it illegal to park in a handicapped parking space but its ok to use a handicapped toilet? Can mute people burp? Why is chopsticks one of the easiest songs to play on the piano, but the hardest thing to eat with? Why is it when we talk to God we are praying, but when God talks to us we are put into the loony bin? Why do you go âback and forthâ to town if you really must go forth before you go back? Why can't you get a tan on your palms? Why do dogs sniff other dogâs bottoms to say hello, why donât they just bark in their face or something? Why do companies offer you "free gifts?" Since when has a gift NOT been free? If something "goes without saying," why do people still say it? You know the expression, "Don't quit your day job?" Well what do you say to people that work nights? What would happen if you were to feed a pig some bacon? Do pyromaniacs wear blazers? If you don't pay your exorcist, do you get repossessed? If money doesn't grow on trees then why do banks have branches? Just what was the "Baby On Board" sign for? Did it help us decide which car not to hit in case of an accident? Do stuttering people stutter when they're thinking to themselves? Why is it that when we are humming and then we plug our nose, our humming stops? Do people really hum through their nose, or their mouths? What happens when you say âhiâ to your friend on an airplane who's name is Jack? Why is it that people say they "slept like a baby" when babies wake up like every two hours? If a deaf person has to go to court, is it still called a hearing? If Sunday is the holy day of rest why do we have to get up early for church? When you snap your fingers, does the sound occur when your middle finger releases from your thumb, or when your middle finger hits the palm of your hand? Is an alcoholic just a drunk that's scared of a hangover? Is there anything easier done than said? If money is the root of all evil then how come churches ask for it? If there were a knowledge contest, would the female winner be called Miss Informed? If rabbits' feet are so lucky, then what happened to the rabbit? Do pigs pull ham strings? Does anyone actually kill two birds with one stone? What do you say when someone says you're in denial, but you're not?