Disgusting things that........

#1
At work the other day me and a mate was talking about what is the most disgusting thing that has happened to yourself or a mate or what you have do to someone esle.................

His was that he once stuck a small piece of sh*t up a mates nose :cry:
 
#2
Had a bloke place small amounts of poop in someones gloves on excercise for a laugh, when he took them off it was behind his fingernails and everywhere, gopping to say the least,still makes me chuckle to this day!!
 

RMA1

War Hero
#3
Sheep Sh1t in the front pad of a tin bin. Bloke couldn't understand why he could smell sh1t every where he went.
 
#4
I heard of a Tp Sgt who wanked into a syringe and then injected the Tp Comd's Tooth paste tube!!!! Still makes me laugh now!!!!!
 
#5
Commando_Spirit said:
I heard of a Tp Sgt who wanked into a syringe and then injected the Tp Comd's Tooth paste tube!!!! Still makes me laugh now!!!!!
Class! I'm borrowing that one next exercise
 
#6
When in Ph 1 Trg we put a trout into the Resi case of an 'overseas colleague' when the GAS GAS GAS was called he donned the respirator in a speedy 28 seconds and proceeded to fill it with his stomach contents!!!

When rubbing the puke from his face he also rubbed the CS in!!!!! I nearly suffocated in my resi laughin so bloody much!!!!

We also put the CSgt's Blues in his bergen, not so funny when he beasted us to Death!!!
 
#8
eggnog said:
Skiffing a blokes chin strap and watch hm gagging all day.
MEGA!!!!!!!! I'm laughing like a fcuking loon here!! Shit the bed this is a GREAT thread for a childish twat like me!!!!
 
#9
A rock on QCS, all the guys just about to march on to EARLS COURT a sgt named cotdeath sticks his finger up his arse then rubs it on one guys top lip as he marchs on
 
#12
jaybee2786 said:
A rock on QCS, all the guys just about to march on to EARLS COURT a sgt named cotdeath sticks his finger up his arse then rubs it on one guys top lip as he marchs on
Was Cotdeath his first or second name?!!?
 
#14
#17
jack-daniels said:
I once swamped in a blokes mouth because he was snoring too loud, woke the fcuker up it did!
Come on JD, don't leave it there, what happened next? This has potential of a classic!
 
#19
Not whilst serving but...
Climbing a tree with my mate about 10ft below me, suitable footings, dropped my pants and let out a bowel load of brown porridge, mate below had nowhere to run so closed his eyes for incoming. My aim must have been shite as he didn’t get hit with the main charge, only got shrapnel wounds, but lots of them.
 
#20
I don't think my worst really holds a candle to some of this stuff but...

I was feeling very ill as an ickle year 8 school student. So ill in fact, that after half a day of struggling to "keep it in", I ended up blasting (under high pressure!) a load of brown soup all over my boxers and down the inside of my school trousers :p .

I decided that I couldn't just go home, I had to be sent home, so I wouldn't get into trouble.
so I sat in registration for about 10 minutes, stinking of shite, a couple of the lads threw up cos of the smell (it was bad!), the form tutor came in, smelled something wrong straight away, and halfway through registration we had a little conversation:

Ms Bailey: "What's that smell?"
Kids: "It's Squiddly!"
Ms Bailey: "That's enough of that, I won't ask again, where is it coming from?"
Squiddly: "It's me Ms Bailey!"
Ms Bailey: "Did you step in something? Go outside and clean your shoes, they stink!"
Kids: "No, Ms Bailey, Squiddly shit himself!!!!"

Anyways I got sent home, had to walk two miles, with boxers and school trousers full of semi liquid shite :( .

I had some fun in that class though, it included such stars as

Tamsin: School bicycle, despite the fact that she was NOT a looker - I kept well away...

Shaun: Aww, bruce willis wannabe bless him, first thing he ever said to me was "My nickname's 'Taz.'" It wasn't. He thought that everything was a movie, he'd forward roll out of corners into the unsupported kneeling position, like he was John McClane.

Lewis - a bit charvery, a bit dim on the surface , but a generally likeable kid, who, when asked, proudly asserted that French for "Scissors" was "Sizzlers".
Ahh, I miss my yoof :D .
 

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