Discussion in 'The NAAFI Bar' started by Mighty_doh_nut, Feb 21, 2003.

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  1. Last night after the Brits Mrs Do-nut and I were talking about the famous and the beautiful, and who we would most like to shag, whilst her answer was simple, she only wants me ;D I on the other hand can't make up my mind.

    Natalie Imbruglia or Jennifer Anniston although incredibly attractive run the risk of being wooden and crap shags.

    On the other hand do you go for someone such as Tera Patrick or Kobe Tai who are perhaps not as pretty as the above but would drain your sack in an instant.

    Please help me overcome this problem.
  2. After watching natalie imbruglia suck the chocolate from a the middle of a pengiun biscuit last year,  I reckon you would be on safe ground if you said she would shag you half to death and still have something left over for later :D :D :D :D :D :D :D
  3. MDN, have you seen the film...'Gone in 60 seconds'...?
        Angelina Jolie.....has to be her...she could suck a bowling ball through a hosepipe.
  4. Right.....  Sophie Ellis Bextor,  Alyssia Milano, Cheryl (Girls Aloud) and a top girl I met last week.  The last option is the more realistic but as fu#king usual someone got there first....  Oh well :)
  5. woopert

    woopert LE Moderator

    In no order of preference:

    The boggy with the big norks from Girls Aloud
    Denise Van Outen
    Catalina Guirado
    LeeLee Sobievsky
    Ann Maurice (coz she would make a superb dominatrix)
    Jennifer Garner
  6. Denis Van Outen got to be a big yes.....I bet she could stand her ground in the bar then take you home and whoop you into tomorrow morning.

    I saw Natalie Imbruglia with that penguin bar, she is my all time top totty chick......I wonder if she'd let the Donut knock her back doors in?

    Kylie would be great if her norks were a little bigger and she wasn't a pigmy. Very nice legs & arse & always wears heels.

    Stained Undies, are you a lunatic, Sophie Ellis Baxter is a bogmonster.....Would rather sleep with Mandy Dingle
  7. Fick mein old boots, that Sophie-Beamish-Trekkie has got a swede like a satellite dish.

    Big Mandy, now your talking. I saw her walking along the beach last year, and she was rubbing her footprints out with her own arse. I believe her blood type is Ragu.

    I think that targetting good looking ladies contravenes Queens Regs. It was always my experience that "Going Ugly Early" avoided disappointment and always resulted in some end away, albeit with a minging swamp donkey.

    C'mon chaps, admit it. Who was the worst looking bird you ever nailed (fingers and tops not included). You know the one I mean, you spent the next day looking at yourself in the mirror wondering how you'd sunk so low.

    Mine was a fat sweaty-sock in Helensburgh, on a night off from live firing at Garelochead. I enjoyed the pleasure of her company in the back of her Fiat Punto. She was horrible, the biggest, fattest, spottiest arse i'd ever seen or handled. She looked like the woman who played Danny de Vitos mum in "Throw Momma from the Train". After we'd finished, she got out of the car and locked it, and only started to pull her knickers up whilst walking back to the pub, completing the movement, just in time to push the doors open.

    I asked her to marry me the very next day.
  8. mmm Growlers, I once pulled for a seventeen stone german pig creature, when she pulled back the sheets they had skid marks on from the victim the night before....

    Common sense and health and hygeine told me to run.... the thought of relaying the tale to my mates made me stay......... I did and in the morning when I went for a dump repayed her kind hospitality by placing my 'First wipe' in her airing cupboard ;D
  9. When i was younger........i  met a young girl in a welsh holiday resort, because i was such a gentleman.....I wore a condom.......however due to the size of the lady.....the large  amount of alcohol.....and the less than amazing firmness of my erection........when i bid farewell......(to the shouts of my mates), I had lost the condom........most probably left at the last thrust .........somewhere deep inside .....isnt that a song title ?.
    She was large I wasnt......good times.
  10. Then why don't ya slither over here Lippy and I'll 'slip ya a crippla' ;)
  11. Hee he hee he!
  12. I do like civvies..honestly, I do, I do ;)
  13. F*ck me girl, that was quick! Were you waiting up for me? ;)
  14. Yeah, 'taunting'....afraid that's all he's good for.  All mouth.....no trousers!  ::)
  15. He keeps sending me PMs expressing his burning desire to 'come out' on this site. Go for it son, I said. :D