Difficult Kids and Supermarkets; an elite spectator sport.

So, I was at the checkouts in ASDA earlier today before work, putting the shopping through the self serve checkouts that you get these days, when I notice a little ginger child, of maybe 6 or 7, carrying a box of Lego towards one of the checkouts where, presumably his dad, was bagging up the shopping.

He was moving at quite a pace, as his (rather fuck ugly) mother had obviously been pursuing him from the toy isle, saying mothery things along the lines of "no Justin (might have been his name, not sure) we're not buying that, put it back". He screeches to a halt at the checkout, slaps this box of lego on the scanner as his mother shouts at him "OHMYGOD DON'T SCAN IT!!!, and I swear, the entire section of that supermarket froze in time to hear out that most reassuing *BLEEP*....

I thought I had a pretty hot headed mother as a child, but the look on this ginger hippo's face was unlike anything I'd ever seen.... The father mouthed something to him, which I can only assume was along the lines of "you little fucking bastard....."

Needless to say the child ran like fuck, back into the supermarket.

Mother then goes totally fucking spare and begins to chase this kid around the shop, shouting all kinds of shit at him, mostly rage blabber. I must have been in ASDA for at least another minute, paying for my shopping and walking out to the car, and I could hear her going the entire time.

It was really, really funny. My only regret is that I did not stay to witness the inevitable, merciless and savage beating that child took if he eventually got caught, I like to think it would have been akin to a Wehrmacht solider being caught by the Red Army in the center of Berlin in April/May 1945.


But it also got me remembering other hilarious times watching parents go fucking ballistic at their kids in the middle of ASDA/Tesco/Morrisons etc., mostly near the Toy isle which in my ASDA is opposite to where they keep the shaving foam, deodorant etc. So I have seen my fair share. If there is any reason for a bloke to do the shopping, this is definately it. Unfortunately the Mrs glares at me every time I watch such an event unfold, or even if I see its also amusing sister situation, kids getting themselves hurt, because she knows I find that sort of thing really really funny.

Maybe it's because I don't have kids of my own that I find this stuff hilarious.

Are there any others on here who aslo get a good chuckle out of watching parents losing their rag with kids when doing the shopping? Or even from watching a mother accidently slam their 8 year old daughters fingers in the car door/watching a child fall face first to the ground from a scooter and counting the seconds before the howling begins?

Do feel free to share your experiences and golden memories here!
 
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jonnopne21

Old-Salt
Many moons ago I worked in Asda and watched a lady pick her kid up by his arm scream at him and belted the living shit out of him for asking for a toy...in the same ASDA I watched a 2yr old lad launch a bottle of sauce towards the checkouts and him mum and dad didn't scream or shout him they just laughed their bollocks off...

I do find some of the antics of parents funny as fuck especially chavs "McKenzie you little b'satrd but that fucking chicken down or I rip your bastad head off" while shouting a her mother down the phone
 
I did wonder how long till the high horse brigade show up to look down upon me for shopping at ASDA ;) It's close to work and I has everything I want. Why go out of my own way for grocery shopping?

Not a shoplifter, not a junkie (except for the odd tin of Brasso every now and then), a poor person? ehhhhh.. not really poor, just never seem to have any money..
 

jonnopne21

Old-Salt
I would rather shop online its so I can keep up with the jones's
and not have the stuck up cnuts on my street look down their noses at me when I get out of the car with a B&M bargain's bag...
 

NEQcounter

War Hero
Not long after we arrived in New Zealand we were shopping in our local Countdown. My then three year old daughter spotted the massive rough looking Maori Mongrel Mob gang member (Hell's Angel) stood behind us with a full moku, tattoo'd face, who smelled like a Patagonian shit smugglers knapsack. A short tug on my t shirt was followed quite loudly by "Look daddy! That man's got a painted face!"
The checkouts went quiet and the girl on the cash register gave me a discreet 'concerned' look.
Without gaining eye contact with the mobster I quickly got the shopping in the bags, paid and bravely scuttled us all off to the car park.
 
One was hoping to see if the UK has an equivalent of the the Fat slobs on mobility scooters in 'Asdas' here, but so far I haven't come across any. No doubt in a few years will have similar slobs rocking up to 'Asdas' where I live in sunny Essex.....
 

jonnopne21

Old-Salt
One was hoping to see if the UK has an equivalent of the the Fat slobs on mobility scooters in 'Asdas' here, but so far I haven't come across any. No doubt in a few years will have similar slobs rocking up to 'Asdas' where I live in sunny Essex.....
like I said I worked in Asda and there was this old snatch in a mobility scooter she was also wear in an orthopaedic boot what a twat she was. She would single out new member of staff give them Rockall and put complaints in about them...however she's not a difficult kid just a grave dodging bint
 

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