Devil or the deep blue sea??

Discussion in 'The NAAFI Bar' started by Cuddles, Jun 4, 2006.

?
  1. Honestly it's not you, I mean it's never happened before, I may have had too much

    38.5%
  2. No really, I'm almost there...if you wouldn't mind...it doesn't usually t

    61.5%

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  1. You have all been there I know, so which is worse...is it

    Scenario A
    Where scaffolding poles could not get you up, despite the huge amount of liquid inside your body - mainly Stella not blood to be fair...brewer's droop

    or

    Scenario B
    Where you could grind and grind until dawn for no return except friction burns - brewer's can't quite finish, where neither of you wants to comment but something akin to minced pork is going on "down below"
     
  2. It's a fine trick to hit that level of inebriation where the beer goggles are on (if required) and sensation deadened enough for performance to be enhanced.

    I've gone beyond this one too many times, they get proper stroppy when you fall asleep :oops:
     
  3. B is much worse. Been there a few times.....at least with not being able to get it up you only suffer for a while, normally till you pass out. But when you go on for ages you end up mega sore the next day or two.....not good. Of course, if she is sober enough to remember it all, then I'd rather be sore but be thought of as a bit of a stallion than a bit of a poof for not getting it up!
     
  4. So that'll be flowers, chocolates and a few expensive dinners for Mrs. Cuddles by way of apology, eh? :D
     
  5. It’s got to be brewers drop, there’s nothing worse.
    At least with scenario B you can still have a good old dig around of the fishy cavity, you don’t even get that with the drop :(

    I can never forget my first attack of the drop, it’s a traumatic time in my life, forever burned into memory.

    I’d met a stunning blond at a rock club I frequented during my uni days.
    Size 8, natural blond, perfect tits, arsse, and face; she must have been hammered because she was hitting on me, I couldn’t believe my luck as I normally get the fatties and the munters chasing me :?
    We decided to leave for my place after a bit of oral excavation and wondering hands.
    The plan quickly changed to her place, as it was quicker and she couldn’t wait.
    The plan changed a third time to the ally behind the club.
    At no point did I have any input in the decision making, but who was I to argue to a stunning slut :D
    So there was young Goku, pinned against an ally wall with his trouser by his knees and little Goku in yon sluts mouth. “Brilliant” thought I “danger sex” as I could hear people walking past the ally… sadly no.
    After several minuets of the pretty slut slurping away at little Goku and the ungrateful bar-steward just sitting there unresponsive, we decided it best to pull my trousers back up and move on.
    Not far from the ally and on the way to the girls flat was a children’s play ground.
    Round two.
    As she lay down on the seesaw I could tell my neither regions were still asleep, one too many pints I’m afraid.
    I had to buy myself time to recover, so I explored her nipples with left hand and mouth while my right hand was busy trying to wake little Goku up – no such bloody luck :(
    After a while she got bored, so I had to changed tactics.
    Rug munching was the next logical step, it kept her entertained and while I was on my knees munching away, my self abuse and aggressive slapping of little Goku (purely in an attempt to wake him up) was less obvious to her.
    Sadly not a twitch and she was again getting bored.
    There was only one thing for it – TEABAGGING :D
    I straddled her face and dipped my bollix and rod in her mouth :D
    …but still nothing.
    I had to admit defeat, “sorry I think I’ve had too much to drink” I said as I got off her face and she pulled her knickers up “could we wait until the drink has worn off?” to which she replied “it already has” with a look of disgust in her eyes…
    She walked away and I never saw her again.
    I didn’t really care though, it was my final year and final week of uni so I didn’t have to worry about bumping into her again.

    Ever since I’ve been kicking myself about that night, and abusing myself furiously about what might have happened, but at least I put the effort in :D
    It’s a classy girl that lets a flaccid man straddle her and put his balls in her mouth, I bet she would have been dirty… :(

    Bugger…
     
  6. Plus Goku there's the minor side-effect of waking up in the morning with a heartily bruised penis.