The old-fashioned, honourable method of addressing being publicly shamed used to be resigning, in the case of government Ministers (think Lord Carrington) and making use of the Mess Webley, in the case of Service bods.
Now Walts are a combination of the two, they lie to everyone, like politicians, yet also benefit from the advantages they receive in respect of their fictional Army/RAF/RM status, so the question has to be asked, are we not justified in both dragging them through the forum/press/etc and expecting them to top themselves?
I mean, they must be quite unhinged to act as they do anyway, so its less of a leap for them to do the decent thing and suck the Webley than it is for real people.
Does anyone know of any Walts that have been outed and have done the decent thing, so we can drink to them for making amends?
The problem in this case is the 'Mess Webley' . An airsoft Browning HP doesn't really get the job done...
Most Walts will opt for a token brush with some Paracetemol and alcohol then lie back and revel in the sympathy and attention of the misguided. They will later allude to their hospital stay in a manner that implies it was 'mission related'.
Suicide is not a Walt option. Their prefered course of action is to move to a town where nobody knows their face and lay low until the fuss caused by their exposure has died down. Then, (despite any good intentions they may have convinced themselves that they had) they will slide back into the ways of Waltery and dip a toe in the water of lies.
Soon they will be found at the bar of a new local, regaling the credulous and gullible about the time when.....
Inevitably they will be drawn back to Ebay and Silvermans and will be stood in front of the mirror in a floppy beret and medals that place them in every conflict from the Boer War to Basra and at least one other army.
The most desperate to live the role will invest in a regimental tattoo.
Suicide is not an option with Walts - unless it is 'assisted suicide'.....They have no pride, self respect or concept of decency to begin with. Any disgrace can be compensated for by future lies and even when they are exposed part of them loves the attention they are receiving, however humiliating it is.
A better option is to brand them on the face with a large 'W' or perhaps the capbadge of the unit they claimed to belong to.
I've been turned over by a walt and it could have had quite serious side effects, thankfully it didn't and I remained oblivious for two years.
A bloke at my shooting club used to appear, shoot and go, kept himself to himself.... After a while his very squaddie like sense of humour and terminology appeared and he mentioned he was RE then Intelligence Corps, and had spent considerable time in NI and had gone on to join the RM reserve in Liverpool...... all credible and had no reason to doubt him.
We became reasonably good mates and we'd go out for the odd beer.
When I left the forces I did some CP work for a chap in Cannes (an arab who is still detained by either the French or US authorities for bank fraud)
Cutting a long story short I was tasked with picking up a suitcase of currency from a hotel in Madrid and bringing it back to a Notary in London. THis was a Friday night and the flight was booked for early the following morning, with the amounts involved and the shady appearance of the deal I decided I wasn't going on my own.
I called some colleagues in the industry and no one could react with such a quick flash to bang time, so I was fcuked.... then I thought I'd bell Ian, my oppo from the gun club.
He was game and the following morning we made our way to Madrid via Barcelona and met up with a team of quite heavily armed moustached men who handed us over a million dollars, in Iraqi currency (1997) we did one in the motor when the phone rang and my gaffer said 'Chris you can't travel by air with that' apparently sactions etc said you couldn't leave Iraq with more than 10 Dinar........ I had over three million in a bag
We drove and got the train back to the UK and ever a very scary and eventful 36 hours got home....
I trusted him purely because of his experience, his stories and the fact that he stacked up....
Two years later I was helping him move house when his Army discharge paper fell from the loft hatch and down by my feet...
He had served 24 days in the RE and had discharged himself.... My first thought was how that cnut would have reacted if all had gone pearshaped with that cash.... Naturally I flew into a whirlwind of ultra violence and harmed him around the face and neck then grilled him about why the fcuk he'd bluffed me.
He started to continue to bluff by mentioning, the shooting of PIRA terrorists, and being engaged on a Special short term service etc...... so I dished him another slap, then came the tears and the story about him being a cab driver and never having done anything more exciting than pulling a dead granny from the back of his motor
And sometimes it turns out that the Walt might not be a Walt at all:
About 10 years ago the US Chief of Naval Operations, ADM Mike Boorda found himself in the centre of press furor as to whether he was entitled to the V for valour on to medals he had earned (Navy Achievement Medal and Navy Commendation Medal) Although it was clear in the citation that the medals were awarded for combat operations the V was not specifically mentioned. Faced with the disgrace of being accused of having worn the device for 20 plus years ADM Boorda went home and shot himself.
A few weeks after the funeral, ADM Zumwalt, the CNO at the time the medals were awarded stated that he had publicly announced that the V device was authorized for NAM and NCM issued for actions during combat. Lots of confusion in the press as to whether vessel was in right coordinates on the right dates but many public statements by Zumwalt at the time that use of the device was authorized.
Came a bit late for ADM Boorda. ADM Boorda was the first CNO to have gone all the way from Seaman to CNO. Former enlisted usually don't get that high up.
I don't think ADM Booda was a walt, although he may have screwed up on a very complicated set of SECNAVINST's on the topic if what vessels were in the appropriate theatre on what dates.
This thread has just put me in mind of an Uber-Walt that I came across as a young Subbie.
This bloke was the SQMS of Med Sqn, Cdo Log Regt in the early 90's. Can't remember his name but it'll come to me....
He confidently claimed (to the new MA Quaarns) that as TQ of a Sqn at Poole during the '82 tete-a-tete he had HALO-ed into the swimming pool on the Canberra. WTF????? I wasn't long out of trg and in do-as-youre-told mode, but even I knew the swimming pool was welded over and used as an emergency flight deck!
He came out with some other bollocks about a firefight in Joburg during a Speed March competition in SA and some chick SA rozzer throwing him her pistol cause she couldn't get a clear shot......
I remember it was when he was duty SNCO and I was OOD I had my first "Leadership Challenge" - the cnut was armed with a Browning and was bonkers enough to tell these idiotic unbelievable stories, so WTF would he do with a loaded weapon!?!?!?!
He didn't slot himself, more's the pity. He did, however, manage to issue me a gonk-bag with a rather well-loved w*nk-sock in the mesh pocket. Fecker. Serves me right for being a Rupert I suppose.