Hello Playmates!
I Hope that you all had a nice Christmas and wish you all a Happy New Year during 2007. If you are a member of our Armed Services, and especially serving abroad, may you return to our shores ASAP, safe and sound, to your caring and loving families.
Sorry I have been away, in a Government Institution, being brainwashed into âlovingâ Bliar and his Comrades. Unfortunately, it did not work, I was apparently too thick. I am given to understand that Bliar sends his regards to all from his holiday villa, and is thinking of us all, wherever we may be, and whatever we are doing.
I am also given to understand that if I attend on a voluntary basis, they will provide me with free electricity in the form of electric shocks; supplied of course from electric generated by wind farms. (Methane from cattle?). I was a little concerned when they required me to sit in a wooden chair with electric connections, including a metal skull cap, with my bare feet in metal bowls of water, but fortunately, when they threw this big switch, all the lights went dim and the fuse box fell of the wall. They all seemed extremely disappointed that they could not âcureâ me, permanently, but promised to give me another opportunity, soon.
Some of you were just a little bit wicked whilst I was away. Jinty, I have never been instructed by Police where I was obliged to stay away from home overnight, even on a three month assignment, I returned home every night. Therefore, I have never made false expense claims to police, or indeed anyone else. I have never used my family to search fields for shot gun pellets.
Jinty / Jan, your post number 37 dated 14th December 2006, to Moodybitch, about the abusive photographs was indeed accurate, as to what happened; so why do you persist in Jackanory stories that you are well aware are untrue? I have reviewed all our emails, and if you persist with Jackanory, I shall consider posting them on my website, showing the factual position, as I would not like to bore the arrse off of Arrse Members, on this site.
TTC, my solicitors have never instructed me not to post on Arrse, they just queried if I liked getting âkicked to deathâ in virtually every post! Virtual reality is great. I just close my eyes when I am being virtually âkickedâ and think of Moodybitch. Cor!
Sammy the Cat, appeared fairly accurate, with his thoughts about some form of vendetta, but as you know Sammy, thatâs life! Some of the writings of Jinty / Jan are inaccurate. I did find some of the postings quite funny and amusing. As far as Fort Halstead is concerned, I should check the security system if I were you, as I am photographed at Reception and issued with a Pass every time I attend, and then escorted by staff to the places where the examinations / tests are conducted. I shall try to introduce myself to the ROC on my next visit, in case the ROC thinks my âlucky heatherâ pitch is a fraud.
Northern_Biff. If you are going to ring me up at work, and on my mobile, and leave messages indicating that âYou are a fcuking cnutâ at least wish me a Merry Christmas, as it left me quite hurt to think that you had the Christmas âspiritâ and was not sharing it with others.
Moodybitch. I just could not believe what you wrote to Jinty / Jan, did I read it wrong, or did you actually go some way to defending me? You could be right, I may be failing in love with you! Ignore the others, they are just jealous.
Grant. If you are reading this, you know by way of PM that I thought you were some mouthy 23 year old who had aligned with a distorted view from Jinty / Jan, but when I found out that you were in the services (of the USA) in the 1960s, I was quite jealous of how you managed to write on Arrse, in such a way that you disguised your age. Biscuits and others; you are quite correct, I am not suing Grant.
Whilst typing this, someone sent me a text:-
âToday is International Disadvantaged Peopleâs Day. Please send an encouraging message to a retarded friend, just as I have done. I donât care if you lick Arrse, interfere with animals or occasionally shite yourself. You hang in there sunshine, you are fcuking special.â
Thank you most kindly that person, and I now pass this message on to all of you Arrse members / friends, with sincere best wishes.
Deano, I shall be delighted to see you and yours, for fish and chips, as soon as the weather permits, and, thank you most kindly for your support on this site. Apart from the odd poster, Malice may be present. (Who is Malice?). I have been assured that matters are coming to a head, in the not too distant future. We shall see!
I urge all posters to be kind to me; at least until 2007.
Retards to all
âFrankyâ