Debretts Web Etiquette

Discussion in 'The ARRSE Hole' started by Wishful_Thinking, Jun 13, 2008.

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  1. Any thoughts my fellow ARRSERs? :twisted:
  2. BrunoNoMedals

    BrunoNoMedals LE Reviewer

    Facebooking Poking Rules

    Rule 1: If someone pokes you, it means they want to hump you.

    Rule 2: Only poke someone you want to hump.

    Simple and effective.

    As for kindness and respect... I respect anything with a decent set of norks and can be extremely kind to those willing to show me them.
  3. Join Arrse where the best etiquette is on display on a daily basis, and if you don't like it fu@k off you smug stuck up bunch of @unts.

    Oh and always use the spell checker you don't want to come across as ignorant.
  4. Very helpful advice there cbgramc! Like it :D

    I think the photo bit is funny. I think we should add that nugget of advice to the Photo Gallery :twisted:
  5. OK, how's this?:

    [align=center]The guide to ARRSE-iquette[/align]


    [align=center]"The Pvt Golden Rules"[/align]

    1 - Do NOT post on ARRSE while drunk, under the influence of soft or hard drugs, time-of-the-month or w@nkers who have just cut you up on the way in to work.
    You WILL regret it once you sober up/calm down; you are not the Perrier Award winning comedian you thought you were. Trust us, it seems like a good idea at the time, but then so did that tattoo of a bloke with his head up his arrse didn't it? :roll:

    2 - Are you contributing anything to the discussion by replying (or even more so the forum as a whole if starting a new thread)? See the ARRSEhole for the barrel-scraping level of drivel that can be generated in here, usually on a Friday.

    3 - The NAAFI Bar has a warning - heed it. Don't complain to anyone about anything in there, you'll just make it worse for yourself (and more fun for the rest of us).

    4 - For the love of God don't pretend to know what you're talking about if you don't - you are absolutely guaranteed to have the error of your ways pointed out to you by a genuine expert.
    This applies doubly in the QM & MT forum where there are loonies playing 'Guess the NSN' or among the plane-spotters in Aviation.

    5 - If called out/found out/laughed at for being a mong, don't get on your high horse or continue to proclaim your superiority, just fcuk off and leave the discussion. Seriously, you are NOT entitled to the last word, it's better to remain silent and be thought a fool than to open your mouth and remove all doubt.

    6 - Contribute some money - to the site and/or Help Them Out. It's only a few beers that you'd p1ss up against the wall anyway. Doesn't have to be much, it all adds up.

    7 - Use the Search function before asking the same fcuking question that has been asked 400 times before, especially if it's about joining up.

    8 - Check out the whole site, not just the forums, it's very interesting. ARRSEpedia is a wonderful mixture of useful, abusive and p1ss funny. The gallery may just show you that the cnut you've been giving grief to in the NAAFI bar is your old mucker from the Womens' Auxiliary Balloon Corps '78-'82. Won't stop him being a cnut, but at least you'll know he was a cnut in real life as well.

    9 - If you're a civvie (not ex-serving or TA, but a real, never-served civvie like me) be aware that your opinions are automatically worth less on here than others. Some people will talk to you, some won't; but see points 3 & 4, some discussions will be undiscernable gibberish to you (as opposed to the barely-discernable gibberish that it is to everyone else). Don't give everyone the benefit of your 'knowledge' on the subject. Just don't. You ever joined in on someone else's family argument? Then you'll know what I mean. Unless a new arrsehole is what you require of course.

    10 - Finally, it's standard netiquette for all forums interweb-wide but seems to be a dying art these days:
    [align=center]***LURK AND LEARN*** [/align] Don't post anything for the first two months or so after stumbling across this site. You're itching to post, but count to ten or go and make a brew or something.
    It's been said before/it's not true/the anecdote you are regaling us with was made up in 1968 by a respected site member who will point this out to you in full and at length/you're a cnut/you're a walt/you'll be upset by the responses from the nasty men etc. et-fcuking-cetera.

    Of course, none of the above apply if you're a 17 year old blond female with 38DDs that you're prepared to post piccies of in the NAAFI Bar. Just watch out for some of the resident pervs...

    Comments? With the usual sense of dread (and I am aware of the irony involved in me posting this especially with regard to point 9, but hey, fcuk it).
  6. Nice one Taxy!
    MOD can you sticky this thread please!
  7. Debretts?

    Show me the Tourette's Web Etiquette :)
  8. All sounds reasonable to me!! Nicely summed up T_T, as usual!

  9. Eloquent and succinct Tax
  10. TheIronDuke

    TheIronDuke LE Book Reviewer

    *Linky Thingy*

    Aw come on Taxi. This place would be no fun at all if nobody posted when they were pissed / stoned / demented or offered opinion on where we went wrong in Nireland from the perspective of a day trip to Blackpool when they were 10.

    Does this new Debretts offer advice on whether one should seat the Archbishop above or below the Major General? That one catches me out every time.
  11. Surely the Archbishop sits in the Major General's lap?
  12. Surely the Archbishop gets seated above the Major General, and definitely takes his seat first - since he's wearing a frock!