Dear santa.....

Discussion in 'The NAAFI Bar' started by tigerbaby, Oct 16, 2005.

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  1. Since there is only 10 weeks until christmas I've decided now is the time to start considering what to get who. As I was innocently looking through various sex sites for ideas :lol: I came across this I felt it was my duty to share it with you. Just think one for the other half when you're away and one for you when you're homesick!!! Genius!!! Naturally I've bought a few kits to..err...test as I couldn't live with the guilt of recommending something that didn't work....
  2. Can I not just have George Clooney and Brad Pitt? Sean Bean, the bloke from "That Thing You Do" that plays the drums, and of course, Johnny Knoxville. They would be all the sex toys I would need.

    Oh, and a clawhammer.
  3. You may be onto something there.... celebrity sex shop!

    Your favourite celebs bits made to life size.... oooh I can see the possibilities already.....
  4. No - I want the real thing.

    Did I miss Richard Gere off?

    And Gunny......
  5. I'd like a fanny magnet, a Fisher-Price knocking shop and a gusset please Santa.
  6. No probs, do you want a pushbike too?
  7. Cutaway

    Cutaway LE Reviewer

    Bravo_Bravo, your wish has been granted.

    [​IMG] [​IMG]
  8. But can the real thing come in a variety of colours and be made into a soap???

    Just think you could tell all your mates "Had a shower last night with these 2 c@*ks called Johnny and Richard - was the best scrub down I've ever had"

    You couldn't get that with the real thing - mix and matching
  9. its october...................

    can we leave christmas to somewhere in errrrr december please??

    c**ksucking m*therf**kers

    edited to point out i was just in the swearfilter thread :oops:
  10. It's 10 wks away not 10 months!! Nothing wrong with being organised especially when the gifts are soooo much fun....
  11. I totally agree.... (but i wont go into the planin and prep sh*t)

    btw does bein a woman have anything to do with it you think>>>???
  12. I would like to say nooooo but deep down I know the truth....

    however I'm in denial!! noooooooooo nothing to do with being a woman at all!! Tiz as much for a man's pleasure as a woman's and let's face it if you told your other half you were starting your christmas shopping early and the presents were for you both to enjoy he's hardly gonna turn around and say "nah I'd rather wait til christmas thanx".
  13. Ladies, ladies, ladies.

    Surely the fact that at least 50% of the time you end up with a box of milk tray and a bunch of flowers from a garage forecourt (with the price tag still attached) should have led you to the conclusion that, unless we have fcuked up on a galactic scale, we put the bare minimum of planning and preparation into the holiday period. Any good ideas we might have for our better halves immediately get held in reserve for Valentine's Day since we have long since learned that to fcuk up on THAT day will result in another six months locked in the bathroom with a grot mag as our only sexual outlet.

    Come to think of it, unless you're a single bloke, Valentine's Day sucks donkey balls even more than a day over-eating and monging in front of the idiot box watching Only Fools and Horses, Indiana Jones repeats and Auntie Betty.
  14. I feel your frustration here... didn't like her prezzie last time eh?? never mind.... since you're starting to wander from the topic might I be the one to bring it full circle back to the beginning - my suggestion for your next present is....

    I'm sure after receiving such a thoughtful gift she'll be on her back in no time, and if not who cares you'll have a clone of her imortant parts anyway!!! :lol:
  15. Hope they don't make a scented variety!! Thought of fish stuck to me fridge.....lets not go there.