Dating

#1
I am my a friend is currently dating a lass.

She is lovely and we he, gets on great with her. We he both have a history, obviously given our ages, her 54 me him 60 and we him have been chatting online and on the phone for a a month followed by six actual face to face meetings whereby, by mutual consent, the relationship can move forward, and those meetings/dates were magnificent.

She wants a relationship, but is 6 months out of finding her husband was over the side with her best mate, and is still married to him. (Divorce pending and no worries there at all.)

My my mates problem is, she really doesn't like my his best mate and his wife.

Massive problem.

I My mate really likes her, and would have no problem at all making this relationship work.

But my his mate is, well, a mate for life, it's one of those relationships.

So, what the fuckity fuck should I he do?

Over the years I have noticed that the Arrserati are experts at this type of thing and I feel that this can be solved.

In the time honoured fashion of newbies asking for advice though, sensible replies only...

So. What the fuck to do?

(For those worried about slagging off a mod, rest assured this goes nowhere, it's not me, its a friend...)
 
#2
I am my a friend is currently dating a lass.

She is lovely and we he, gets on great with her. We he both have a history, obviously given our ages, her 54 me him 60 and we him have been chatting online and on the phone for a a month followed by six actual face to face meetings whereby, by mutual consent, the relationship can move forward, and those meetings/dates were magnificent.

She wants a relationship, but is 6 months out of finding her husband was over the side with her best mate, and is still married to him. (Divorce pending and no worries there at all.)

My my mates problem is, she really doesn't like my his best mate and his wife.

Massive problem.

I My mate really likes her, and would have no problem at all making this relationship work.

But my his mate is, well, a mate for life, it's one of those relationships.

So, what the fuckity fuck should I he do?

Over the years I have noticed that the Arrserati are experts at this type of thing and I feel that this can be solved.

In the time honoured fashion of newbies asking for advice though, sensible replies only...

So. What the fuck to do?

(For those worried about slagging off a mod, rest assured this goes nowhere, it's not me, its a friend...)
Tricky one. Is it a rebound? And how long has the marriage been? I don't know about you, my longest relationship has been for about 2 years and even getting over that was a bit tough - though, from what I know, in most instances, gals tend to move on quickly.

Funnily enough, my last ex was and probably still is married, broke off with the marriage but not officially divorced. They were done and across miles, just didn't get around to annulling it. Fun times.
 
#3
Your mates Your mates mates are her mates and vice versa. The ones that don't like each other need to behave like adults and keep the grief for after hours in the ear of their own other half.

I've ex's whose friends I'd have happily headbutted so far into next week that even Google couldn't find them but I just nodded and made polite coversation. They were her mates and gave here support and stuff and even though I couldn't stick the whiney little c**ts I bit my tongue. Your your mate's ami d'amour needs to get this and so do you so does your mate.

At the end of the day however the relationship goes mates will always be mates. It's what "mateship" is all about. If she's a keeper then she needs to tolerate if not accept your your mates friends and vice versa. If she's merely brought there for fun and games until it gets boring then shag her rotten tell your mate to shag her rotten and move on but don't burn your your mates mateships either way.

If she starts forcing you your mate to ditch long-time friendships on her whim without any effort to tolerate/endure/put up with then she's a controlling sort and you your mate needs to be wary.
 
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#4
@redshift has made a very valid point, unless she’s banged another man like a whöre short on coin, your friend is likely just the rebound......At 54, unless she is a hideous disfigured freak, she will be enamoured with the first chap to roll up, but that will dissipate in short order as she realizes how much cöck is out there for her to jump on, particularly of the younger variety. As for the mate being disliked, the old saying bro’s before ho’s came about for a reason......
 
#5
Tricky one. Is it a rebound? And how long has the marriage been? I don't know about you, my longest relationship has been for about 2 years and even getting over that was a bit tough - though, from what I know, in most instances, gals tend to move on quickly.

Funnily enough, my last ex was and probably still is married, broke off with the marriage but not officially divorced. They were done and across miles, just didn't get around to annulling it. Fun times.
I call bs! Your hand to man realtionship should be solid! Longer than two years I would imagine...
 
#10
WTF does that even mean? Euphemism for something else? ;)
If you don't understand him what fcuking chance have we got?

@Arte_et_Marte , when a very good long term mate met someone a couple of years after he got divorced. The woman he met was also divorced with a couple of teenage daughters, all smiles and nice to see you's. Gradually he saw the rest of the lads less and less, not that we were pub going, get shitfaced types, it was more going off and doing blokey type stuff. In the end he just sort of stopped all together, sad really. Looking at him and her objectively I could see she had him totally wrapped around her little finger. When I went around to visit a couple of times you could see her teenage daughters hugging and cuddling up to him and calling him 'dad', nothing natural about it though, contrived as if they had been told to do it by their mum.

Take a step back from it all, think long and hard bloke, even go and have a chat with your mate and get his thoughts.
 
#11
I am my a friend is currently dating a lass.

She is lovely and we he, gets on great with her. We he both have a history, obviously given our ages, her 54 me him 60 and we him have been chatting online and on the phone for a a month followed by six actual face to face meetings whereby, by mutual consent, the relationship can move forward, and those meetings/dates were magnificent.

She wants a relationship, but is 6 months out of finding her husband was over the side with her best mate, and is still married to him. (Divorce pending and no worries there at all.)

My my mates problem is, she really doesn't like my his best mate and his wife.

Massive problem.

I My mate really likes her, and would have no problem at all making this relationship work.

But my his mate is, well, a mate for life, it's one of those relationships.

So, what the fuckity fuck should I he do?

Over the years I have noticed that the Arrserati are experts at this type of thing and I feel that this can be solved.

In the time honoured fashion of newbies asking for advice though, sensible replies only...

So. What the fuck to do?

(For those worried about slagging off a mod, rest assured this goes nowhere, it's not me, its a friend...)
Your friends best course of action (through you of course) is to post some nude photos of her on here so we can judge whether it would be worth keeping her, OR you could post them on here for ‘him’ just so certain pervs on here, ok, I mean just so I can have a perv of them
 
#13
I would take it slow & easy, 6 months out is not that long to find out that the grass is not that green, or just shag the arrse off her until you your mate get(s) tired of her.
 
#14
You've known your mate longer than her and there's more history. If she has a problem with that, bin the tart.

Chances are you won't be able to beat her off with a shitty stick if you mangle her ego in that manner. You may have to change your name and move.
 
#16
I am my a friend is currently dating a lass.

She is lovely and we he, gets on great with her. We he both have a history, obviously given our ages, her 54 me him 60 and we him have been chatting online and on the phone for a a month followed by six actual face to face meetings whereby, by mutual consent, the relationship can move forward, and those meetings/dates were magnificent.

She wants a relationship, but is 6 months out of finding her husband was over the side with her best mate, and is still married to him. (Divorce pending and no worries there at all.)

My my mates problem is, she really doesn't like my his best mate and his wife.

Massive problem.

I My mate really likes her, and would have no problem at all making this relationship work.

But my his mate is, well, a mate for life, it's one of those relationships.

So, what the fuckity fuck should I he do?

Over the years I have noticed that the Arrserati are experts at this type of thing and I feel that this can be solved.

In the time honoured fashion of newbies asking for advice though, sensible replies only...

So. What the fuck to do?

(For those worried about slagging off a mod, rest assured this goes nowhere, it's not me, its a friend...)
Fuck every one of those involved in the throat.

Then pour hot water on any pets.
 
#17
She wants a relationship, but is 6 months out of finding her husband was over the side with her best mate, and is still married to him. (Divorce pending and no worries there at all.)
As others have already said, this is rebound, she needs a couple of years at least to clear the decks as it were.
 
#18
<snip>
She wants a relationship, but is 6 months out of finding her husband was over the side with her best mate, and is still married to him. (Divorce pending and no worries there at all.)

My my mates problem is, she really doesn't like my his best mate and his wife.

Massive problem.
<snip>
From a female perspective, don't pursue this one for a romantic relationship. You have two big issues:

1. Whatever she says, she's not emotionally available to you - horrible and recent end to her marriage and not yet divorced. You're an exciting distraction for her at the moment but she's got a lot of head-sorting stuff yet to work through, and the divorce will bring more of it to the surface. If she is serious about a relationship with you, she'd do the decent, honourable thing by you and get her divorce out of the way and let the dust settle first. You deserve that if you're offering her a long-term, happy-ever-after, relationship and if she's a reasonable woman she'll acknowledge and accept it.

I suspect she's afraid of being single at her age and facing getting old alone, and therefore needs to get the next man (you) in place pronto - she's using you.

2. Mates are mates are mates. Why doesn't she like your BFF? I'm presuming she's not spent a great deal of time in his company so far and you're still at the stage where people are on their best behaviour? If you pursue a relationship with her it's very likely you'll end up in a situation where you have to chose between her and him. And you're going to need him when it all goes tits up due to point 1 above.

In my experience, you're looking at heartbreak and therefore best of out of it unless you enjoy the excitement and emotional wreckage.
 
#19
1. Whatever she says, she's not emotionally available to you - horrible and recent end to her marriage and not yet divorced. You're an exciting distraction for her at the moment but she's got a lot of head-sorting stuff yet to work through, and the divorce will bring more of it to the surface. If she is serious about a relationship with you, she'd do the decent, honourable thing by you and get her divorce out of the way and let the dust settle first. You deserve that if you're offering her a long-term, happy-ever-after, relationship and if she's a reasonable woman she'll acknowledge and accept it.
seconded. Slow down, there's no need to hurry. If the relationship is genuine and serious, you both have time for her to get her affairs in order before launching into a new chapter with you.
 
#20
From a female perspective, don't pursue this one for a romantic relationship. You have two big issues:

1. Whatever she says, she's not emotionally available to you - horrible and recent end to her marriage and not yet divorced. You're an exciting distraction for her at the moment but she's got a lot of head-sorting stuff yet to work through, and the divorce will bring more of it to the surface. If she is serious about a relationship with you, she'd do the decent, honourable thing by you and get her divorce out of the way and let the dust settle first. You deserve that if you're offering her a long-term, happy-ever-after, relationship and if she's a reasonable woman she'll acknowledge and accept it.

I suspect she's afraid of being single at her age and facing getting old alone, and therefore needs to get the next man (you) in place pronto - she's using you.

2. Mates are mates are mates. Why doesn't she like your BFF? I'm presuming she's not spent a great deal of time in his company so far and you're still at the stage where people are on their best behaviour? If you pursue a relationship with her it's very likely you'll end up in a situation where you have to chose between her and him. And you're going to need him when it all goes tits up due to point 1 above.

In my experience, you're looking at heartbreak and therefore best of out of it unless you enjoy the excitement and emotional wreckage.
What he said. Nail..head..hit.
 

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