Dating website

Discussion in 'The NAAFI Bar' started by TurtleHead, Jan 25, 2012.

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  1. TurtleHead

    TurtleHead Old-Salt Book Reviewer

    Has anybody noticed that the dating website that is advertised on this website has some right horny looking 'mature' ladies on it?
    Well I have, and I have made a couple of observations
    1. They look like complete whores and leave me with the impression that if i were lucky enough to actually get hold of one of them i would be gauranteed to get noshed off round the back of mecca bingo following a glass of house wine and a battered sausage
    2. do the scrubbers who are the 'poster' girls for the site reflect all of the other 'mature' ladies on there?

    It has me thinking, I am 27 and married but do quite fancy kicking the back doors in of a 'mature' red headed whore, so i may just join up.

    Surely there have got to be some 'mature' ladies out there who are exactly like the women i see on the internet sites i frequent when my wife goes to Zumba?
     
  2. Nobody noticed. Where have you been fucking Orange woman?
     
  3. TurtleHead

    TurtleHead Old-Salt Book Reviewer

    Okay i'm off now. didnt realise there was a thread out there already, althought i am still going to try and throw a quick one off whenever i see the advert.

    And no Jarrod not over the orange one
     
  4. Hope you're going to leave you missus for the entertainment of ARRSE troops while your out gunning down mature hairy starfish with your snub nose single shot.
     
  5. Oi I resemble that remark!!
     
  6. Don't I fucking know it. Spastic.
     
  7. TurtleHead

    TurtleHead Old-Salt Book Reviewer

    I have spoken to my dear lady wife and she has agreed to give you a service on several conditions,
    1. ensure your teeth are in
    2. ensure your comb over is in order
    3. take a cheese grater to that penis of yours
    4. start taking viagra now in anticipation of said sexual act, apparently it takes a lot for you to be semi-erect
    However having laid down these stipulations she feels that your premature ejaculation may still be an issue
    :excited:
     
  8. Dear boy, don't you know the current term is now "mong", spastic is sooo 1970's
     
  9. Totally different disorders it's like comparing idiots and imbeciles.
     
  10. Fair point
     
  11. OOOOOh (raises handbag to chest) did your Paki date fuck u off then X
     
  12. I never had one sweetie.
     
  13. Married at 27? You poor bastard. Should have waited until you were at least the other side of 30. I can only assume you did it to get out the bloc. Now it's you and her shagging each other for the next 50ish years and growing fat together and annoying each other until one of ya finally dies - sounds great!

    You could have had a line of desperate milfs lining up for sleazoid kinky sex.

    Good job I'm single, what's the site address btw?