Daft stuff me dad said

#1
Seeing the forum for 16yr old PCSO ! reminded me of when my Dad, gawd bless his old cotton socks, used to say “You know when you’re getting old son – the bobbies start to look young”, and other stuff like if you pull faces and the wind changes you’ll get stuck like that (mmm, that one might be true), to name but two among a myriad of others.
Any more daft stuff from parents, maiden aunts?
 
#3
I used to have an uncle who told me it was our little secret and don't tell your parents, does that count?
 
#8
On departing for my first tour of NI, "If you get killed, your mother will never talk to you again."
 
#9
Colonel_Foreskin-Crumb said:
stroker said:
I used to have an uncle who told me it was our little secret and don't tell your parents, does that count?
did he sit you on his knee and have a bag of Worthingtons Toffees???
It wasn't his knee!
 
#10
My pop used to come out with these one's

"Gonna see a man about a dog" (going to the pub)

"youre be laughing on the other side of your face when i get hold of you"

"Im gonna kick youre arrse from hear to next sunday"
 
#12
My Grandad had a few odd sayings:

When asked something like 'Do you know....' He'd say 'Oh yeah, we used to go to different schools together.' Or 'I know him, one of his eyes are both the same.'

Mind you he was an ex blanket stacker.
 
#13
smartascarrots said:
On departing for my first tour of NI, "If you get killed, your mother will never talk to you again."
My dad said, "if you get killed, don't come crying home to me" 8O
 
#14
On joing the Army my Great Aunt Alice (ex ATS) Told me: "Here's a couple of quid lass, stay away from squaddies and thall be allreet" She was right, I didn't, I wasn't. Wise woman she was.
 
#15
Whats the point in joining the Army you will never stick it, youll be out after six months.


The times through basic I considered sacking it and thinking Im not going to let him win so stuck it out. Twenty years later and still going strong, it wasnt till Id got to my ten year point when he told me he'd actually done 9 years in the RASC and his dad had said the same to him. I suppose fathers know best :D
 
#16
My father used to say in reply to "I bet you".

"You can kiss Bets arrse".

He said (on my joining the Army), "why not join the navy, at least you get a clean bed every night and do not have to live in the ground. He also said "if you are killed in the navy at least you go clean" (meaning the water).
 
#17
After speaking to my dad from the gulf MK 1, he finished the phone call with "and dont go getting into any trouble"....
Hanging up the phone and turning round to see the biggest military build up since WW11 and eveybody being armed to the teeth. Also up against the biggest battle hardened army in the region.
WHERE WOULD I GET INTO TROUBLE....
 
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