Crack Ho

#1
Okay.. I mean how do I get in on these cons - er , I mean, artistic endeavours?

And who the hell are the numptys who buy into this crap and toss the cash on the table so that they can lay claim to being 'patron and connisieur'?

damn... Doris Salcedo a Colombian ' artist ' spent six months and $ 600,000 US to ' create' a crack in the floor of the Tate Modern in London..

The 'sculpture ' is called Shibboleth [ catchy that, guess the first thing you have to do is come up with some fancy label that gets the moneyed set nodding 'sagely' ]..it starts as a hairline fracture and runs for 167 metres widening to 30 centmetres. A f**kin hole in the floor of the Turbine Hall at the Tate for people to ooh at and trip over with their cheese crackers and glasses of overpriced plonk as they nod ' knowingly ' while reading the accompanying pamphlet that ' splains it all to the unwashed.

Seems the crack in the floor is ' aimed at highlighting divisions in society ' or some such drivel..

maybe, if I come up with a ' deep ' name and a fancy' reason for it' I can flog my old dryer lint to the Victoria and Albert or the Louvre..

jeezus!!
 
#2
Rocketeer said:
Okay.. I mean how do I get in on these cons - er , I mean, artistic endeavours?

And who the hell are the numptys who buy into this crap and toss the cash on the table so that they can lay claim to being 'patron and connisieur'?

damn... Doris Salcedo a Colombian ' artist ' spent six months and $ 600,000 US to ' create' a crack in the floor of the Tate Modern in London..

The 'sculpture ' is called Shibboleth [ catchy that, guess the first thing you have to do is come up with some fancy label that gets the moneyed set nodding 'sagely' ]..it starts as a hairline fracture and runs for 167 metres widening to 30 centmetres. A f**kin hole in the floor of the Turbine Hall at the Tate for people to ooh at and trip over with their cheese crackers and glasses of overpriced plonk as they nod ' knowingly ' while reading the accompanying pamphlet that ' splains it all to the unwashed.

Seems the crack in the floor is ' aimed at highlighting divisions in society ' or some such drivel..

maybe, if I come up with a ' deep ' name and a fancy' reason for it' I can flog my old dryer lint to the Victoria and Albert or the Louvre..

jeezus!!

More like trip into.

Apparantly at least three people have already been injured wilst viewing it!
(Source R4 news)
 
#3
Rocketeer said:
damn... Doris Salcedo a Colombian ' artist ' spent six months and $ 600,000 US to ' create' a crack in the floor of the Tate Modern in London..

The 'sculpture ' is called Shibboleth [ catchy that, guess the first thing you have to do is come up with some fancy label that gets the moneyed set nodding 'sagely' ]..it starts as a hairline fracture and runs for 167 metres widening to 30 centmetres. A f**kin hole in the floor of the Turbine Hall at the Tate
Being a Paddy I know several dodgy builders who can do that for you at a considerably cheaper price. And they'd probably throw in a badly tarmaced driveway or two as well while they're at it.
 
#4
Rocketeer said:
maybe, if I come up with a ' deep ' name and a fancy' reason for it' I can flog my old dryer lint to the Victoria and Albert or the Louvre..

jeezus!!
I'll give you $500,000 for the "Lint from a Skint Git". I've already sold the concept for three quarters of a mil to the "Art" idjuts in Toronto. Wait till I throw in my dry smelly sock lint - ka-ching ka-fcukin ching.
 
#5
Rocketeer said:
spent six months and $ 600,000 US to ' create' a crack in the floor of the Tate Modern in London..
I knocked a hole in my bathroom wall after a night on the piss by accident. How much do you think the Tate would buy it for? I'll say it's "aimed at highlighting the life of a squaddie".
 
#6
iamalondoncrab said:
Rocketeer said:
spent six months and $ 600,000 US to ' create' a crack in the floor of the Tate Modern in London..
I knocked a hole in my bathroom wall after a night on the urine by accident. How much do you think the Tate would buy it for? I'll say it's "aimed at highlighting the life of a squaddie".
its a touching portrayal of the fractured society, through the eyes of a squaddie. itll sell better if it has a 'message'
 
#7
Rocketeer said:
Okay.. I mean how do I get in on these cons - er , I mean, artistic endeavours?

And who the hell are the numptys who buy into this crap and toss the cash on the table so that they can lay claim to being 'patron and connisieur'?

damn... Doris Salcedo a Colombian ' artist ' spent six months and $ 600,000 US to ' create' a crack in the floor of the Tate Modern in London..

The 'sculpture ' is called Shibboleth [ catchy that, guess the first thing you have to do is come up with some fancy label that gets the moneyed set nodding 'sagely' ]..it starts as a hairline fracture and runs for 167 metres widening to 30 centmetres. A f**kin hole in the floor of the Turbine Hall at the Tate for people to ooh at and trip over with their cheese crackers and glasses of overpriced plonk as they nod ' knowingly ' while reading the accompanying pamphlet that ' splains it all to the unwashed.

Seems the crack in the floor is ' aimed at highlighting divisions in society ' or some such drivel..

maybe, if I come up with a ' deep ' name and a fancy' reason for it' I can flog my old dryer lint to the Victoria and Albert or the Louvre..

jeezus!!
Do I detect some jealousy that you didn't think of it first? :D

Litotes

PS. I have a slightly cracked piece of wood holding up my verandah. I'll call it "Distressed Wood". Offers to me c/o my bank in the Cayman Islands... :D
 

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