Courtesies

#21
Don't bruise the face.
 
#22
OK OK all that is all very good for ladies, but as this is almost an extinct species what is the appropriate way of dealing with the snakes with t1ts that are currently the female of the species? And more importantly what is the simplest, cheapest and quickest way to get your leg over?
 
#23
dingerr said:
And more importantly what is the simplest, cheapest and quickest way to get your leg over?
 
#25
Glesga_short_bloke said:
Never rummage through a ladies purse - even with permission

Always let the bint...erm...lady enter the house first when you return home. Not only does this display your manners but also means that she gets knifed by the escaped loony and you can make off on your toes
Ah, you can take the boy out of Port Glasgow...

Alway be interested in her. If you can't be bothered to put in the effort, why should she? And if she's not genuinely interesting, why are you with her? Have a w*nk and save yourself a fortune.
 
#26
smartascarrots said:
Glesga_short_bloke said:
Never rummage through a ladies purse - even with permission

Always let the bint...erm...lady enter the house first when you return home. Not only does this display your manners but also means that she gets knifed by the escaped loony and you can make off on your toes
Ah, you can take the boy out of Port Glasgow...
Gaza Strip? pansies - I know about REAL urban survival :wink:
 
#27
dingerr said:
OK OK all that is all very good for ladies, but as this is almost an extinct species what is the appropriate way of dealing with the snakes with t1ts that are currently the female of the species? And more importantly what is the simplest, cheapest and quickest way to get your leg over?
Patience, Dingerr, patience... that's the supplementary question!

Litotes
 
#28
halo_jones said:
A real lady will also accepts these thoughtful acts with equal grace.
Hear hear halo.......so very sad that so many women react so stupidly and ungratefully to acts of genuine chivalry and gentlemanly behaviour spoiling it for the rest of us who genuinely appreciate them.
Its no wonder its so hard to find a gentleman these days, they are too scarred of getting their nuts bitten off by over zealous feminists!
The only men i find still willing open doors for you are usually over 60! Charming old geezers who are too old and too wise to bother with all that politically correct bolloicks!
Any of you who do maintain these little courtesies, please don't let anyone put you off from continuing to do so.....its a sure way to leave your recipient with a warm glow inside her! lol!.....oh and don't just do it for the pretty ones lol! Its a sign of a true gentleman....he doesn't discriminate by beauty!
 
#29
Ah, a thread aligned to my standards!
I endeavour to be a "Gentleman" of sorts, keeping on top of doors, walking etiquette, drinks, meals, sex, the whole caboodle. I am extremely generous in all manners, and would gladly put a myself before a woman in many a circumstance.



If i was good looking and had a penis bigger than a hamsters, then i could possibly be the world's most eligable batchelor!
 
#30
I have opened doors for men - none of them have asked me if I am gay.

What does a woman do if she approaches a shop (etc) door to leave and sees another woman about to enter?

Well, it's not just courtesy - it's common sense - the door (chances are) will be opening inwards - towards the person leaving, that person has a choice if s/he gets there first - open and barge past or open and wait - that's all.

(Or - in my case - start to leave shop - see lovely leg appear out of car outside - hope owner of leg is coming to this shop - pretend to have forgotten something - can't find my car keys - YEAH - she IS coming here - open door "there you go" flutter of eyelashes "thank you")

(No problem - see you later in my latest fantasy - BABY!)

Then there is the 'someone behind you' situation - 3 choices - open door, walk out letting it start to close so person behind you has do dash to catch it - maybe with 2 bagfuls of shopping.

Open door making sure you hold it open until person behind has got it and then leave.

Open door and allow person behind you to leave before you - many reasons for this - one is you have seen the cleavage and now want to see what the arse is like.
 
#31
Never cum in her mouth.
Never wipe your dick on the curtains.
Never profess undying love (unless its to get laid).
Always open a door and squeeze in before a lady. Then fart so she gets a good whiff.
Always go half on the bill.
Never think out loud about her tasty mum/sister (or father if you're that way inclined) whilst on the job.
Always leave skidmarks on the pan.
 
#32
Welshexpat said:
I have opened doors for men - none of them have asked me if I am gay.

What does a woman do if she approaches a shop (etc) door to leave and sees another woman about to enter?

Well, it's not just courtesy - it's common sense - the door (chances are) will be opening inwards - towards the person leaving, that person has a choice if s/he gets there first - open and barge past or open and wait - that's all.


Of course, i too have opened doors for men....(among other things...best dirty laugh, heh heh!)..and women, and not been abused for my troubles though not often thanked for it either. I remember one occasion when i was standing there like a tit for what seemed like an eternity waiting to get IN to the building, holding the door open for a woman to exit first, and then had at least a dozen people including men just keep piling on through rather than let me in! Doesn't stop me being courteous but i get pissed off at the general rudeness out there.
 
#33
FABLONBIFFCHIT said:
Never cum in her mouth.
Agreed with most of the comments on this thread so far, but how is never cumming in her mouth polite? Rude as fuck if you ask me: just seems ungrateful.
 
#34
FABLONBIFFCHIT said:
Never wipe your dick on the curtains.
I would say that's a wiser option than the pillow case/sheet/her hair.
 

old_fat_and_hairy

LE
Book Reviewer
Reviews Editor
#35
starfire said:
halo_jones said:
A real lady will also accepts these thoughtful acts with equal grace.
Hear hear halo.......so very sad that so many women react so stupidly and ungratefully to acts of genuine chivalry and gentlemanly behaviour spoiling it for the rest of us who genuinely appreciate them.
Its no wonder its so hard to find a gentleman these days, they are too scarred of getting their nuts bitten off by over zealous feminists!
The only men i find still willing open doors for you are usually over 60! Charming old geezers who are too old and too wise to bother with all that politically correct bolloicks!
Any of you who do maintain these little courtesies, please don't let anyone put you off from continuing to do so.....its a sure way to leave your recipient with a warm glow inside her! lol!.....oh and don't just do it for the pretty ones lol! Its a sign of a true gentleman....he doesn't discriminate by beauty!

Your sentiments are appreciated, but the manner is a bit ageist! And, maybe it has nothing to do with political correctness, and more to do with our old-fashioned upbringing, natural courtesy and obervance of good manners!
Also, it's a good way of checking out a woman's arse.
 

Biped

LE
Book Reviewer
#36
One must not forget the kind of ladies (and we all like a bit of this once in a while) who fart, drink from pint glasses, wipe their snot on their sleeves, swear like dockers and just love rough sex and rougher men.

Thank god for them, otherwise I'd be celibate and single. I still open the door for them mind you,
 
#37
Biped said:
One must not forget the kind of ladies (and we all like a bit of this once in a while) who fart, drink from pint glasses, wipe their snot on their sleeves, swear like dockers and just love rough sex and rougher men.

Thank god for them, otherwise I'd be celibate and single. I still open the door for them mind you,

Door to the basement?
 
B

Biscuits_AB

Guest
#38
craftsmanx said:
My father impressed on me. "Always treat a lady the way you would want your mother to be treated"
Yep and what he impressed upon your Mum saw her paying fortnightly visits to the local A & E.

Mind you, he'd had a skin full
 
#39
starfire said:
halo_jones said:
A real lady will also accepts these thoughtful acts with equal grace.
Hear hear halo.......so very sad that so many women react so stupidly and ungratefully to acts of genuine chivalry and gentlemanly behaviour spoiling it for the rest of us who genuinely appreciate them.
Its no wonder its so hard to find a gentleman these days, they are too scarred of getting their nuts bitten off by over zealous feminists!
The only men i find still willing open doors for you are usually over 60! Charming old geezers who are too old and too wise to bother with all that politically correct bolloicks!
Any of you who do maintain these little courtesies, please don't let anyone put you off from continuing to do so.....its a sure way to leave your recipient with a warm glow inside her! lol!.....oh and don't just do it for the pretty ones lol! Its a sign of a true gentleman....he doesn't discriminate by beauty!


The Stella sees to that...........LoL
 
#40
She: 'If you were a gentleman, you wouldn't have done that!'

He: 'If you were a lady you wouldn't speak with your mouth full!'
 
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