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Cost to level a garden

Mr Bane may be the man for the job. When he did my garden I’d given him a fairly vague 'job spec' to achieve this...

DB93A8BC-4FEA-46C1-AF08-E8CE23E8DD06.jpeg





and whilst he didn’t quite get it as envisaged, I think he was pretty damned close. This is the end result:

1610891809719.jpeg


Not bad I hear you say. At mates rates too.
 
Hi all,

Once more I must ask the accumulated knowledge of Arrse.

Recently moved into a new house, and the garden needs fixing. It's currently uneven, so needs levelling, and there's some Astrotuf that I'd like ripping up. Additionally, there's a patio area that needs levelling and another gravel/har base are (currently with a shed on it) that would need ripping up.

Looking for the whole area to be grassed over, except the patio & under shed which just needs re-levelling.

Total ground area is approx 90m².

Any ideas what this should cost, so I don't get ridiculous quotes? I live in South Essex, if that makes a difference.
Who the feck puts AstroTurf in their yard?
 
The same people who cover their houses in 'stone cladding' in the sure and certain knowledge that people will believe it is a genuine stone built cottage in the middle of a red brick terrace...

View attachment 540190
View attachment 540191
You lot don’t execute people in public for this nonsense?
Perhaps HOA’s ain’t that bad, especially if they prevent the above from lowering property values in the neighborhood.
 
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You lot don’t execute people in public for this nonsense?
Perhaps HOA’s ate that bad, especially if they prevent the above from lowering property values in the neighborhood.
The top image is a real house in a real street. Such abominations are everywhere but I doubt you’d find many new installations. The cost of removal and making good is prohibitively expensive - back to original is not going to be achieved without some serious rebuilding.

The second (buff and blue) is on a film studio lot (Coronation Street) and is little more (afaik) than an frontage with enough behind to hold it up. It is also something like only 2/3rds full size although that is not obvious from the image.
 
Septics who live in double-wides.....

There's plenty of those round here, and I can 100% assure you that they don't put Astroturf in their yards. All manner of broken vehicles, toys, farm implements, furniture etc, yes. Astroturf, indeed turf of any description, no. It occurred to me a while back that they consider it "treasure". Be useful one day, but not today, kind of thing.
 

Gout Man

LE
Book Reviewer
I
Once more I must ask the accumulated knowledge of Arrse.

Recently moved into a new house, and the garden needs fixing. It's currently uneven, so needs levelling, and there's some Astrotuf that I'd like ripping up. Additionally, there's a patio area that needs levelling and another gravel/har base are (currently with a shed on it) that would need ripping up.

Looking for the whole area to be grassed over, except the patio & under shed which just needs re-levelling.

Total ground area is approx 90m².

Any ideas what this should cost, so I don't get ridiculous quotes? I live in South Essex, if that makes a difference.
I read the first line and thought, “oh gawd no”.

Make up a big sob story and contact Titmarsh he’ll come round with his gang and do a sterling job for you.
 

bcsack

Old-Salt
There's plenty of those round here, and I can 100% assure you that they don't put Astroturf in their yards. All manner of broken vehicles, toys, farm implements, furniture etc, yes. Astroturf, indeed turf of any description, no. It occurred to me a while back that they consider it "treasure". Be useful one day, but not today, kind of thing.
Quick sidetrack - I think it was Jeff Foxworthy who said "you know you're a redneck if it mentions tyres in your will"
 

Arte_et_Marte

ADC
Moderator
Last job I had in 2020.

IMG_20201208_155225.jpg

Cut out 5 yards of scruffy artificial grass that sloped down from the nice artificial grass, past the patio doors and to the garage at the back of the photo.

IMG_20201209_102330.jpg

Break up an old concrete drive alongside the garage.

IMG_20201209_102348.jpg

Break up and remove a couple of tons of hardcore that was under the artificial grass.

IMG_20201209_102358.jpg

Keep the old earth mound back with sleepers and remove some old slabs. The gap at the bottom of the photo will have half a sleeper installed and have steps up to the old lawn.

More in the next post...
 

anglo

LE
I'm looking much more at the "throw money at the problem and get a pro to do it" approach rather than "DIY and mess it up".

As I will mess it up. And the Frau will not forgive me.
If you live in Cornwall, I know of a very good bloke that does landscaping
got all the machines needed.
 
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Arte_et_Marte

ADC
Moderator
Part 2

IMG_20201210_113245.jpg

Repairing the pipe to the soakaway from the garage.

IMG_20201210_113228.jpg

Happy that the garden is now levelish.

IMG_20201213_131748 crop.jpg

Break for Christmas and Boxing day.

20210108_150020.jpg

Removed an angle of earth, built a dwarf wall and capped with pier caps. (oversize because the customer wanted them!) Relaid original slabs.

20210108_150002.jpg

Steps built into the wall of earth for access to the upper lawn. Sleeper planters alongside the fence filled with topsoil. Small step built for access to the garage. New Indian sandstone slabs laid,

Two men.
Ten days. (2 days off for rain and two off for Christmas.)
Cost £5000
Customer delighted.
It was a dirty horrible job though.
 
Get a neighbour to tell the cops that you’ve been gobbling off about burying prostitutes in your garden.
Rake it flat when they finish digging.
 
Part 2

View attachment 540212
Repairing the pipe to the soakaway from the garage.

View attachment 540214
Happy that the garden is now levelish.

View attachment 540215
Break for Christmas and Boxing day.

View attachment 540216
Removed an angle of earth, built a dwarf wall and capped with pier caps. (oversize because the customer wanted them!) Relaid original slabs.

View attachment 540219
Steps built into the wall of earth for access to the upper lawn. Sleeper planters alongside the fence filled with topsoil. Small step built for access to the garage. New Indian sandstone slabs laid,

Two men.
Ten days. (2 days off for rain and two off for Christmas.)
Cost £5000
Customer delighted.
It was a dirty horrible job though.
Nice work.
The customer is going to regret that pier cap decision when the grandchildren come round to visit.
 

Arte_et_Marte

ADC
Moderator
Nice work.
The customer is going to regret that pier cap decision when the grandchildren come round to visit.
Cheers, thank you.

She was penny pinching really. She had a pier cap doing nothing so wanted to use it. Same as the horrible old slabs at the back. We could have re-slabbed all the way around with nice Indian Sanstone for another days work, but she wanted to save money.
 
Who the feck puts AstroTurf in their yard?
From my experience, 'Kelly' and 'Dan'.

Suffice to say 'Tappet' and 'Frau Tappet' will not be retaining this delightful style choice.
 

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