You walk into your ops room one morning and see a birthday cake on the bird table. You ask why it is there and are told one of your officers got it as a present for one of the watchkeepers (whose birthday it is). You compliment said officer on such a kind gesture and begin your brief.
During your brief, you stretch back and place your elbow in the birthday cake!! What do you do next....
Are these truly fictional or are you being ever so 'tonguey in cheeky'. I'm assuming 'C' is the answer. So spill the beans who are these illustrious leaders of ours? I feel a certain affinity to 'cakey elbow guy'.
Realise that the only thing more shocking than having commanded an RLC Regt on Ops would be commanding one in barracks, request a posting order immediately to the Womens Volunteer Balloon Corp (R) or Obtain a blunt spoon and open an artery.
One of your staff challenges you to a traditional Victorian stylee duel. After a number of recent faux pas you are determined to demonstrate your courage and military prowess with a pistol. You empty your pockets of blackboard rubbers and assorted sticks of chalk and duly arrive at the dawn RV, eye up your gallant opponent, pace out your 25 yards and await the word of command to 'Draw'. The tension mounts and as the sun rises above the dusty horizon, the word of command is given
You move swiftly and boldly as only a CO can and reach for your trusty sidearm. Your honed reactions are in vain as you can not find your pistol. Where on God's earth can it be? Where have you left it? When did you last see it? Panic sets in. What do you do?