Cornish Women...

#1
#3
She is now pretty well known around here yes, I know several people who shout warnings to every guy in the bar when she walks in!
 
#8
Of course you know when Foulmouth girls orgasm...........they drop their chips!

I am home at Xmas as well.............although I go for classy birds from Redruth!
 
#10
Can't see the problem for blokes (god help the child though when she eventually has one). She's not taking names or numbers, how are they going to get tracked for child maintenance? She's in for a shock though when she finds out babies have a tendency to grow up and don't stay all cute n cuddly.
 
#11
I'm on my way now.

It'll save me driving round Derby city centre at night looking for girls that are in care to groom.

This story is fucking months old by the way.
 
#12
Of course you know when Foulmouth girls orgasm...........they drop their chips!

I am home at Xmas as well.............although I go for classy birds from Redruth!
Is Redruth classier than Carharrack?

RP
 

TheIronDuke

ADC
Book Reviewer
#13
I've also posted this in the South West forum but figured a wider audience would appreciate this!
You were wrong. Sorry, I should have said you 'figured' wrong. Fucking figured. You are either a Septic, an accountant or a Septic accountant Walt. Figured. Fucks sakes. Get a grip, do.
 
#14
Of course you know when Foulmouth girls orgasm...........they drop their chips!

I am home at Xmas as well.............although I go for classy birds from Redruth!
You can get a Redruth girl for a bag of chips ... and that's not all you'll get; probably a front row seat of the ever popular Shakespeare play "Herpes and Chlamydia"
 
#16
Local sources suggest that anyone who fancies knobbing this choice harlot should make their way to Remedies night club in Falmouth on any Friday night, sit at an empty table looking half pissed and she`ll be all over you like a rash within minutes. :)
 
#17
Camborne girls...... there was this lad on a plumber's site, that lives down that way, told us about them, so I started a series of gags.

The best part was, he used to go down there once a week for a beer..... started telling them the jokes.... they loved 'em.


Two Camborne girls are in the pub, complaining about the cost of living.

One says," I remember when I could go out with 50p and come home with a dozen eggs, two pints of milk, a pound of bacon, half a pound of tea and a chicken."

The other replies, "That's bloody inflation for you."

"Taint nothing to do with inflation," the first one says, " It's all them bloody CCTV's they've got in Netto these days!"



A man walks into the Camborne branch of Boots.

He says to the woman behind the counter, "Could I have a packet of condoms, please, miss?"

Indignantly, the woman says, "Don't you "Miss" me!"

"Sorry, luv, " he says. "Make that two packets?"



Camborne girl goes into the doctors. Says "My husband,wants a divorce cos I've gone off sex."

"Have you?" Asks the doctor.

"Course not, my handsome," she says." I'm just too tired for sex."

"Five months ago, I got a job, and the only way I can get there is by cab. The money isn't great, and the taxi driver always says,"Have you got the money or what?"

"Anyway, that always makes me late for work. So when the boss sees me, he says," Are we going to dock your wages, or what?"

"Then on the way home, the taxi driver says,"Are you going to pay me or what? So you see doctor, by the time I get home, I'm just exhausted."

The doctor shuffles his papers and says," What do you think, should I call your husband in for a consultation, or what?"


Two Camborne girls in the bar on a Friday night.

" That bloke in the Chelsea shirt I picked up last night? What a bast*rd, we'd just finished a sex session when he called me a slapper!"

"Never!" said her friend," What did you say?"


She replies," I told him to get out of my bed, and take his drunken mates with him!"


Two Camborne girls in the bar, one says to the other," I have to be really careful not to get pregnant."

The other says,"But I thought your husband has just had a vasectomy?"


"That's right," says the first one, "That's why I need to be really careful."





I've got fucking dozens of 'em.
 
#18
This Camborne girl decides to spice up her love- life, so she persuades her boyfriend to pleasure her using a very large fresh cucumber, taking her beyond the limits of ecstacy.

They fell asleep.

Hours later, he was wakened by her squeals and moans "Yes, yes,yes oh YESSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSS!!!" "JEEEEEEEEEZUS!!!!!!!!"




Worried, he cried "What's wrong?"















"Sorry, sweetheart, its just the cucumber repeating on me!"



A fat middle-aged Camborne woman and her beautiful 18 year-old daughter enter the doctor's surgery.

The doctor says to the daughter, "OK, get undressed".

The woman says, "Oi, it's me that's come to see you!"

Doctor, "All right, stick your tongue out and say AAAAAARRRRRR".


A little boy is crying in Netto in Camborne.

A man comes over to him and says, "Are you lost?"

The boy replies "Yes."

The man asks, "What's your mummy like?"

The boy replies; "Big cocks and Bacardi breezers."




A Camborne girl goes over to her friend's house wearing a T.G.I.F. T-shirt.


'Why are you wearing a 'Thank God It's Friday' T-shirt on Monday?'


'Oh crap!' the Camborne girl says. 'I didn't realise it was a religious T-shirt. I thought it meant 'Tits Go In Front.''
 
#20
Looking for slightly drunk and horny guys? No military bases round that area, then?
Mind you, the bit about being honest regarding having an STD might be a problem.
 

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