Coppers! What a bunch of bastards eh?

#1
As Arrse is a little obsessed with the Old Bill at present I thought I would start a thread on the subject.

Ever been fitted up by the filth? Ladies ever been offered the "easy" way out of being charged?

Lets hear all your bent/thick copper stories.

Being a well behaved chap I've not had many run ins with the peelers the most noteworthy being arrested for suspected assault. On being lifted from the street outside a large barracks in the wee small hours I asked why I was being arrested and got the reply "you fit the description" when I asked what said description was they refused to tell me. When I asked if perhaps it was average height, average build and short hair they showed me the back of the van.

After a long night of whistling the Great escape theme tune I was finally interviewed. During the interview I not only found out that the suspect was a completely different height and build, had different colour hair and was wearing completely different clothes to me.

Then released without charge after 15 hrs in custody without so much as a sniff of an apology or a lift back to where they arrested me (10 miles away). They did find time to ring the RMP and incorrectly inform them that I had been charged with an offence, who then contacted my unit. When my Orderly Officer rang the nick they then told him they had released me hours earlier.

What a bunch of shit cunts!

Ladies and gentlemen over to you, your tales please.

P.s Any coppers wanted to gob off at me feel free although I shan't be reading your posts. :D
 
#2
spaz said:
As Arrse is a little obsessed with the Old Bill at present I thought I would start a thread on the subject.

Ever been fitted up by the filth? Ladies ever been offered the "easy" way out of being charged?

Lets here all your bent/thick copper stories.
No but I have used the "I'm a pathetic girl and got scared driving alone in the dark..." and been let off speeding twice :D
 
#3
Just you wait spaz, in a minute or two you'll suddenly be overwhelmed by the coppers who are Fine Upstanding Policemen telling you how feckin wrong " YOU ARE " because they don't do anything wrong, DO They?
 
#6
western said:
Never seen a guilty person arrested and then let off in my life, how about you Seagull?
I have actualy. Several times I've sat across the interview table and thought "You're as guilty as a puppy sat next to a pile of poo"

Only for the CPS bod to say otherwise.
 
#7
The_Seagull said:
I think they're cnuts. they told me that, if I joined I'd have a really good job. Lying barstewards!
Totally agree, mate: a bunch of p0ofs who can't even knock out a woman if they hit her TWICE!

The sooner they are replaced with the Fingermen, the better! :twisted:
 
#9
Werewolf said:
The_Seagull said:
I think they're cnuts. they told me that, if I joined I'd have a really good job. Lying barstewards!
Totally agree, mate: a bunch of p0ofs who can't even knock out a woman if they hit her TWICE!

The sooner they are replaced with the Fingermen, the better! :twisted:
He would have been far more effective if he'd been issued with a white vest, Elizabeth Duke Sovereigns, and a can of Stella. That'd learn her! :twisted:
 
#10
I've had good and bad. I've been let off when the book should have been thrown at me and been fcuked over for a minor infraction. Arguably the crime was getting caught either way. But all that was more than 12 years ago.

I think they do a tough job with one arm rammed up their arrse, rather than merely tied behind their backs.

That being said, there is an aura of arrogance that permeates the various forces today. As if we should be thankful they are there and not question their authority and judgement under any circumstances.

I personally think major reform is in the offing, the current system simply isn't working. What comes next is anyones guess.
 
#11
The_Seagull said:
western said:
Never seen a guilty person arrested and then let off in my life, how about you Seagull?
I have actualy. Several times I've sat across the interview table and thought "You're as guilty as a puppy sat next to a pile of poo"

Only for the CPS bod to say otherwise.
I was being ironic, are you American or German?
 
#12
Ord_Sgt said:
I've had good and bad. I've been let off when the book should have been thrown at me and been fcuked over for a minor infraction. Arguably the crime was getting caught either way. But all that was more than 12 years ago.

I think they do a tough job with one arm rammed up their arrse, rather than merely tied behind their backs.

That being said, there is an aura of arrogance that permeates the various forces today. As if we should be thankful they are there and not question their authority and judgement under any circumstances.

I personally think major reform is in the offing, the current system simply isn't working. What comes next is anyones guess.
Thats rather a sensible reply! Do you know what forum this is?

Army nicks are much more fun we had 2 Craftys get a couple of weeks of pokey a few years ago, so we sent up a chocolate cake on a tray under a tea towel with a huge bastard file sticking out of the side, with a note saying "Be quick! meet you at the front gate in 10 mins." The RP just rolled his eyes and gave it to them.
 
#13
Ord_Sgt said:
I've had good and bad. I've been let off when the book should have been thrown at me and been fcuked over for a minor infraction. Arguably the crime was getting caught either way. But all that was more than 12 years ago.

I think they do a tough job with one arm rammed up their arrse, rather than merely tied behind their backs.

That being said, there is an aura of arrogance that permeates the various forces today. As if we should be thankful they are there and not question their authority and judgement under any circumstances.

I personally think major reform is in the offing, the current system simply isn't working. What comes next is anyones guess.
I think a degree level education or six years previous work experience (maybe with some volunteer work as well) needs to be made compulsory. Plenty of good coppers who had neither when they joined but looking at some of the stuff on TV I can't help but think that some of them joined the police because they didn't fancy joining the army as the people they would have been fighting in the latter might have had more than a bobble hat to protect themselves with.
 
#16
western said:
The_Seagull said:
western said:
Never seen a guilty person arrested and then let off in my life, how about you Seagull?
I have actualy. Several times I've sat across the interview table and thought "You're as guilty as a puppy sat next to a pile of poo"

Only for the CPS bod to say otherwise.
I was being ironic, are you American or German?
:lol:
You got me, a bit too tired after todays running about methinks! :oops:
 
#17
The_Seagull said:
western said:
The_Seagull said:
western said:
Never seen a guilty person arrested and then let off in my life, how about you Seagull?
I have actualy. Several times I've sat across the interview table and thought "You're as guilty as a puppy sat next to a pile of poo"

Only for the CPS bod to say otherwise.
I was being ironic, are you American or German?
:lol:
You got me, a bit too tired after todays running about methinks! :oops:
Public Order(aka Kick Fcuk Out of The Crusties)Training today, was it? :wink:
 
#18
Werewolf said:
The_Seagull said:
western said:
The_Seagull said:
western said:
Never seen a guilty person arrested and then let off in my life, how about you Seagull?
I have actualy. Several times I've sat across the interview table and thought "You're as guilty as a puppy sat next to a pile of poo"

Only for the CPS bod to say otherwise.
I was being ironic, are you American or German?
:lol:
You got me, a bit too tired after todays running about methinks! :oops:
Public Order(aka Kick Fcuk Out of The Crusties)Training today, was it? :wink:
No this week is how to arrest oaps using tenuous links to terror laws.
 
#19
Arrest? Frig that. Too much like hard work. Double time to spend half an hour of a ten hour shift standing at the roadside with a speed gun. Woe betide he that enters the 30mph limit at 31. Couple of quick tickets then it's back to the station, via the local chinky obviously. Super.
 
#20
On my 18th birthday me and a few mates got properly battered by some bouncers. We went to the nick to report it. Plod told us - with our torn clothes, bleeding noses etc - to rod off. As we walked off one off my mates said "brilliant - British justice at work". Plod calls him back and nicks him.

Next day we return to the nick to report the assaults again. Transpires that later that day the same men had assaulted, amongst others, two women, a SCHOOL PARTY!!! and other assorted punters. They were local hard-lads, ill-advisedly hired by the pub to cover a bank holiday weekend. They were all leathered on booze and ripped to the tits on speed. Did plod recognise that if they'd listened to us they would have prevented this? Balls, did they. No - they persisted in charging my mate. His brief told him to take it on the chin as if he pleaded not guilty he'd go to crown court and still get stuffed as it was our word against Dibble.

We all went along on the day to watch the shenanigans in court. Plod's statement is an unbelievable pack of bollocks, talking of my mate lashing our drunkenly, even after plod had calmly asked him to cease and desist. Plod knew he was lying; he knew we new he was lying and he didn't give a f*ck.

Since then I've tended not to trust plod as far as I could throw him. I know a few people from school, Uni etc who have joined. Not the sharpest blokes I know.

I also remember once being in my old mans car when he was stopped for having a dead light (which he didn't know he had). Plod on motor bike pulls him over, then stands 20m from the car with hands on hips looking at us, then beckons my Dad over with a curled finger. My old man was foaming, but recognised that with an arrogant twat like this any effort to complain would be a hiding to nothing.

A work associate of my old girl ( a head master, no less) on leaving a restaurant one evening saw plod roughing up a few young blokes behind a van. He goes to remonstrate. Plod duly chucks him in the back of the van as well for a night in the nick. It took over a year of legal action to get an apology and have charges dropped.

So no...not a fan of plod. The Behaviour at the G20 protests is more of what I and family/friends have experienced in the past. And we're all lovely and middle class and educated and stuff. It's not like we're lippy hoodies.
 

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