Controlling Drinking Better

Interested to try the non alcoholic stuff, but little steps

I've just stepped down from old rosie to rattler as a session drink :mrgreen:

I did do a cooking lager and lime boxing night a while back(2017m) and could barely get pissed
 

MrBane

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The only time I have tried non alcoholic stuff was Strongbow, I felt sort of pissed and odd at the same time. The following morning was the hangover from hell.
Is it better than that?
Tasted like Beck's. Take from that what you will.

I'm the kinda guy that can go out and not drink quite happily, but I felt that because I was holding a beer bottle, there was a distinct placebo effect that kicked in - felt a bit tipsy, very relaxed and having a great time, but as soon as I walked out the club to head home at 4am, stone cold sobre. Hopped in the car and off I went whilst everyone else waited for £25 taxis.

Well worth a shot.
 

jarrod248

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Just read this. One facet of my binge drinking is that my regular wing women (Ex matelot) has the philosophy that "Everyone had fun, no one got hurt" And she has been married to a squaddie and a bootneck so has both an appreciation of alcohol in large amounts and refuses to judge any drunken behaviour. When I'm in my next day beer fear she punts it away like there's nothing to worry about "No one got hurt"......Its a pretty low bar.

I'd get on better if people said yes you were a drunken **** stop drinking so much, which is what my internal dialogue always tells me. Although that is based on fear of the potential for a night to go wrong rather than actual reality (Nowt happens have a good time just can't remember getting in)
Nobody got hurt yet or this time?
 
Nobody got hurt yet or this time?
This time. I have exhibited the capabilities to get in some iffy as **** situations so far dodged the bullet other than punch ups which I tend to come out of in one piece. Having said that in reality I'm just bothered that I'll scare my lodgers and or they'll think I'm a freak

It's the standard what's acceptable, ex squaddie---delicate civvie interface that's the issue
 

MrBane

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This time. I have exhibited the capabilities to get in some iffy as **** situations so far dodged the bullet other than punch ups which I tend to come out of in one piece. Having said that in reality I'm just bothered that I'll scare my lodgers and or they'll think I'm a freak

It's the standard what's acceptable, ex squaddie---delicate civvie interface that's the issue
Easiest way to think of it, is that being an ex-squaddie won't stop you from either getting a slap like a civvie or the jail like a civvie for your drunken conduct.

I've arrested plenty of incredibly drunk people, many violent, who wake up in the morning and realise it's not their bedrooms, it's a cell, and burst into tears. If drinking is taking you close to that edge, time to go non-alcoholic.

At least then if it's a punch up, you'll have the sense to run afterwards.
 
Don't want to start an anti AA thread but AA members are by their nature self selecting and also probably fairly deep in their habit when they self refer due to having hit their own level of bottom, so not really a good sample of problem drinking subjects. Plus you would never see a successful self reformed problem drinker in AA because they have addressed their issue themselves.

The Binary Alcoholic/not alcoholic of the AA is in my mind, too black and white/reductive, with the AA connotation that you are fucked and nothing can help you not helpful in the grey world we live in
I agree with that (ish); though not the last sentence I've quoted. You're welcome to start an anti AA post too. I don't care one-way-or-the-other. In spite of what some A.A. members might say (remembering many are clearly mental, even if they are sober), A.A. does not claim to be the alpha and omega of recovery.

Can I ask why, if drinking is causing you problems, and you can't moderate, why you don't just stop drinking altogether?
 

jarrod248

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Easiest way to think of it, is that being an ex-squaddie won't stop you from either getting a slap like a civvie or the jail like a civvie for your drunken conduct.

I've arrested plenty of incredibly drunk people, many violent, who wake up in the morning and realise it's not their bedrooms, it's a cell, and burst into tears. If drinking is taking you close to that edge, time to go non-alcoholic.

At least then if it's a punch up, you'll have the sense to run afterwards.
These days full of pills too, no idea what they’d done.
 
Don't want to start an anti AA thread but AA members are by their nature self selecting and also probably fairly deep in their habit when they self refer due to having hit their own level of bottom, so not really a good sample of problem drinking subjects. Plus you would never see a successful self reformed problem drinker in AA because they have addressed their issue themselves.
An uncle joined AA and stayed with it and off the booze for many decades until he died (sober). I never had an issue with him and respected the way he turned things around with their help.

My dad on the other hand was a Jekyl and Hyde alcoholic. Once in the pub he could drink like a fish. Fast too. Once he got home he often brought a thunder cloud with him, unpredictable and could quickly turn nasty.

The Binary Alcoholic/not alcoholic of the AA is in my mind, too black and white/reductive, with the AA connotation that you are fucked and nothing can help you not helpful in the grey world we live in
I can understand that. I enjoy beer and cider myself, I don't bother anyone, "there is no problem" but there were times in the past when I might have got slightly out of order or made a bad decision. Thankfully, I moderated considerably and have a day or two off it if I've had a few more than I ought or a week or more if I'm not bothered either way.

You need to be honest with yourself though. If you are able to moderate, great. If you kid yourself and it creeps back every time moderation possibly isn't for you. Time for a binary decision. You don't have to like it but what's more important to you, life or booze?

By contrast I've known pals who couldn't just moderate. One is dead. In retrospect he was never smiling unless he was drinking. Another told me last year that he took a look at himself and realised he couldn't just moderate; he said he was done with waking up at the wrong end of a bus journey, in a carriage on a railway siding or on a bench. He reckoned his drinking was going to kill him. As far as I know he didn't do AA. He just quit. He is married now and has no interest in pubs, beer festivals etc.

In other news the pre bed, binge control hypnotherapy has given me weirdly erotic but bizarre and troubling dreams. however I will crack on off
Are you sure it's the correct course ;)
 
One thing that's perhaps not been addressed very much in this thread is the financial cost of drinking and its associated vices such as smoking. If you decide to quit whether via AA or any other means, then if you sit down and work out how much you will save by not drinking, you might be pleasantly surprised at how much extra money you will have. It is very possible you may be able to afford something you've always wanted or, if not, you will at least have so much more available against emergencies.

To give you an example, when I quit smoking, a fifty pack of what I used to smoke cost me $35 AU and that was bad enough. Now, the same pack would cost me, at worst, $60.30 (if they've not gone up.) Assuming the worst, as I smoked up to sixty a day, that would be $120.60 per day or $844.20 per week, and so and so forth.

As an example, I recently decided to upgrade my computer as my old one was on its last legs. As I like certain games which take up a bit of computing power and space, I settled on a unit which ended up costing around $4,800, including installation and various bits and pieces. I had to wait until I had some money coming in to buy it as it was, but it represented about five and a half or six weeks of smoking at Australian prices.

Our government has imposed a quasi Prohibition where smoking is concerned. They are however, in a classic pinch. On the one hand the health authorities would love to see smoking banned altogether; on the other the government simply makes too much money out of it, even if much of the revenue so raised must be spent on treating smoking related diseases.

Drinking, smoking, and gambling are the working man's classic vices, although they are not confined to the working classes of course. Where gambling is concerned, the Renaissance polymath and founder of the Law of Probability Gerolamo Cardano was asked what he thought of the Florentine Lottery. His answer was forthright. "Lotteries are a tax upon imbeciles!"

And he was right. There aren't many who can do much to reduce the Income Tax they must pay, but, aside from taxes on fuel if you must drive, anyone can reduce the amount of Excise Tax they must pay. Most of the cost of drinking, smoking and gambling is Excise Tax, so if you willingly pay tax when you don't need to, I am sure you will see the point Cardano was making.
 
An uncle joined AA and stayed with it and off the booze for many decades until he died (sober). I never had an issue with him and respected the way he turned things around with their help.

My dad on the other hand was a Jekyl and Hyde alcoholic. Once in the pub he could drink like a fish. Fast too. Once he got home he often brought a thunder cloud with him, unpredictable and could quickly turn nasty.



I can understand that. I enjoy beer and cider myself, I don't bother anyone, "there is no problem" but there were times in the past when I might have got slightly out of order or made a bad decision. Thankfully, I moderated considerably and have a day or two off it if I've had a few more than I ought or a week or more if I'm not bothered either way.

You need to be honest with yourself though. If you are able to moderate, great. If you kid yourself and it creeps back every time moderation possibly isn't for you. Time for a binary decision. You don't have to like it but what's more important to you, life or booze?

By contrast I've known pals who couldn't just moderate. One is dead. In retrospect he was never smiling unless he was drinking. Another told me last year that he took a look at himself and realised he couldn't just moderate; he said he was done with waking up at the wrong end of a bus journey, in a carriage on a railway siding or on a bench. He reckoned his drinking was going to kill him. As far as I know he didn't do AA. He just quit. He is married now and has no interest in pubs, beer festivals etc.

Are you sure it's the correct course ;)
I don’t drink for six months of the year when working (six week rotations) generally drink no more than twice a week when home, it’s more to do with the increased amounts and capacity leading on to potential chaos/risk/stupidity I feel i’m Capable of with my developing higher doses.

Anyways i’ve not had a drink since Saturday night my next proper social activity ie visitors who will want to go out/bbq/drink is easter, I’ll see how I get on dry and report back at easter:salut:
 
I don’t drink for six months of the year when working (six week rotations)
What do you think your drinking would be like if you didn't have these enforced periods of no drinking?

I only ask because another common theme I hear with alcoholics are that there's some kind of brake on their drinking (family or work usually) and when one or both of these go, due to a marriage failure, job loss, or retirement, then the brakes come off, shortly followed by the wheels.
 
What do you think your drinking would be like if you didn't have these enforced periods of no drinking?

I only ask because another common theme I hear with alcoholics are that there's some kind of brake on their drinking (family or work usually) and when one or both of these go, due to a marriage failure, job loss, or retirement, then the brakes come off, shortly followed by the wheels.
I discovered that cutting it out midweek made it an excuse to hammer it at weekends. Probably worse than a steady state
 
These days full of pills too, no idea what they’d done.
I've a friend in A.A. who is a psychotherapist, who was a real hardcore alkie and pill head. He nearly went to prison for stealing a prescription pad and writing his own prescriptions. It affected his work, unsurprisingly, too.

Anyway, he told me he once regained consciousness in a police cell, but due to the pills, found he couldn't talk properly. So the police called in the duty psychiatrist to evaluate him and he was put in some secure waiting room.

After a while, in walked an attractive psychiatrist who said "Gareth! What are you doing here?"

He knew her from his own line of work.
 
What do you think your drinking would be like if you didn't have these enforced periods of no drinking?

I only ask because another common theme I hear with alcoholics are that there's some kind of brake on their drinking (family or work usually) and when one or both of these go, due to a marriage failure, job loss, or retirement, then the brakes come off, shortly followed by the wheels.
Spot on, i’ve Been on leave for months waiting for contract to restart, hence increased bar fitness and increased drinking (still only twice a week tops)
 
What do you think your drinking would be like if you didn't have these enforced periods of no drinking?

I only ask because another common theme I hear with alcoholics are that there's some kind of brake on their drinking (family or work usually) and when one or both of these go, due to a marriage failure, job loss, or retirement, then the brakes come off, shortly followed by the wheels.
To counter that point, if you take all responsibilty and societal constraints from human beings they will generally get squirrelly and skid off the tracks in one way or another.

A gentle example of that would be when people go on holiday and smash it up/drink above the weekly reccomended level for two weeks.

Money is a constraint unless you have hit the frost jacks park bench level, AA seem to think without intervention that's where everyone ends up
 
I've been 'dry' since July 1976, my poison of choice was 12 year old single malt and,I was very good at it.

An inability to do something, due to a heavy session the day/night before, convinced me that was it. I attended AA meetings for over 20 years, in and out of the Army. I never regretted the move but, the hardest part was convincing all and sundry that I didn't want any kind of alcoholic beverage, the drinking culture in the Army made it very difficult, there was always some pillock that tried the 'spiked' drink scenario, not realising that even vodka DOES smell, I even had to convince a number of RSM's that, yes I could drink toasts with water !

I don't have views one way or the other, I do chuckle though at the price of a 'quiet' night out now, the cost of drinks and the fact that in the morning, there's nothing to show for it but, a much lighter wallet.

I gave up smoking in 96, which means I'm a 'boring b*****d' at most social gatherings, the only downside to not imbibing is, having to listen to the same joke/anecdote from the same people, over and over again:confused:.
 
I've been 'dry' since July 1976, my poison of choice was 12 year old single malt and,I was very good at it.

An inability to do something, due to a heavy session the day/night before, convinced me that was it. I attended AA meetings for over 20 years, in and out of the Army. I never regretted the move but, the hardest part was convincing all and sundry that I didn't want any kind of alcoholic beverage, the drinking culture in the Army made it very difficult, there was always some pillock that tried the 'spiked' drink scenario, not realising that even vodka DOES smell, I even had to convince a number of RSM's that, yes I could drink toasts with water !

I don't have views one way or the other, I do chuckle though at the price of a 'quiet' night out now, the cost of drinks and the fact that in the morning, there's nothing to show for it but, a much lighter wallet.

I gave up smoking in 96, which means I'm a 'boring b*****d' at most social gatherings, the only downside to not imbibing is, having to listen to the same joke/anecdote from the same people, over and over again:confused:.
Social gathering for me are a struggle with alcohol never mind without booze. And I find drunk people utterly tiresome :mrgreen:

There are very few people I choose to spend quality time with

All my family socials involve staying sober and banging out early
 
I don’t drink for six months of the year when working (six week rotations) generally drink no more than twice a week when home, it’s more to do with the increased amounts and capacity leading on to potential chaos/risk/stupidity I feel i’m Capable of with my developing higher doses.

Anyways i’ve not had a drink since Saturday night my next proper social activity ie visitors who will want to go out/bbq/drink is easter, I’ll see how I get on dry and report back at easter:salut:
As Joe suggested, maybe think of the money.

One thing that's perhaps not been addressed very much in this thread is the financial cost of drinking and its associated vices such as smoking. If you decide to quit whether via AA or any other means, then if you sit down and work out how much you will save by not drinking, you might be pleasantly surprised at how much extra money you will have.
One trick I used was to set a tight budget, equivalent to three or four pints or even carry only what I needed and an emergency fund in a separate pocket. That seemed to work as I only used a debit card if buying a meal and a pint, otherwise cash only and only up to that limit. The cost had also gone up so much that I would make my drink last longer. If you are a designated driver or on meds and everyone else is pissed it can seem quite bizarre at times :lol:
 

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