Contrived TV Programmes.

Septic programmes that always end in 2 family members in a fight....just pointless
 

DSJ

LE
Anything - ANYTHING - with Stacey Dooley.

They might as well all be called "Stacey looks concerned and states the obvious".
 
Anything - ANYTHING - with Stacey Dooley.

They might as well all be called "Stacey looks concerned and states the obvious".
They all state the obvious, phrases like....If they go in the water they will get wet, to cook this dish I will put it in the oven.
 
I used to like Most Haunted in the Derek Acorah days
 
SAS: Who dares wins.....so contrived and scripted now. Still easy money for the boys and better than the sand pit
There is a distinct bootneck edge to the series rather than SAS so the title is curious
 
I had a documentary film crew aboard off Sri Lanka for a couple of days and it was relentlessly tedious - I never saw the end result but someone who did told me that the boat featured in less than 30 seconds out of an hour. On the other hand I was contracted to run the boat up and down Dubai Creek for an afternoon with an Indian film crew and cast of about 60 dancers and actors. It was gloriously bonkers from start to finish.
 
*, my remit was to fix things with hammers. And swearing.

Ah, REME...

Where would we have been without them? ;-)


Edited to add that I am still mates with the Sgt from my TA Sqn LAD - him and his lads worked miracles to repair bent and busted vehicles in my sqn :)
 
Hardcore Pawn, my wife loves it. Consists mostly of PoCcers, screaming at the owners and then getting thrown out. Totally manufactured.
That and Judge Judy, whose application of the law depends on how much she hates the contestants.
The only upshot is that when she's watching them she's not moaning about me being on Arrse.
 
Anything that ends in a vote off competition. Been watching the programme on BBC4 with Rankin, this is a breath breath of fresh air, no viewer vote off and 6 photographers actually learning. I would thoroughly recommend it.

What grips me is everything is a competition, am waiting for Sewer Worker the Professionals, each week you get to vote off the worker who can't shovel shit fast enough.
Iirc there was a documentary thing about United Utilities going around the North West doing drains, blockages and stuff.
Most of it seemed to be blokes turn up, give the job three coats of looking at, and report it for further action by another team “better equipped to deal with the problem” Meanwhile Mary is left ankle deep in the neighbours sewage because Bob the builder poured concrete down the drain. Or they then declare the drain does not belong to UU so the home owners needs a private firm to sort it.
 
Any show where they tool around the UK in a vintage/character car to the accompanied by music that goes plinky-plonk.

Any of those antique shows where they buy retail then sell at auction to try and make a profit, whereas everyone knows you do it the the other way round.

Every episode of Wheeler Dealers where they prepare the vehicle components beforehand and off camera, so the mechanic can remove them easily.

Also Wheeler Dealers for claiming to have made a profit on a car when they haven't factored in labour costs.
 

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