Contents and standard of horror bags...

#1
Having just scarfed one that was a pearl amongst horror bags, I'm reminded of some of the shite served to me in a paper bag elsewhere...

So lets hear the good and the bad... naming and shaming...

Last one; Granary roll, clingfilm wrapped. Individual Flora serving, individual chedder cheese portion; plastic knife with which to cut it. Cheese and vegetable slice. Bottle of mineral water, 2 finger KitKat, bag of chicken crisps, packet of KP peanuts, slice of fruit cake, apple.

7 RIFLES looks to be in good hands...

At an RTC I've visited - Sausage roll ( meat, non-specific - yeuch ), plain crisps, Panda Pop ( shudder... ) fluffy choc bun. An apple or orange. Sweet chocolate bar.

Spot the lowest bidder...
 
#3
Bravo_Bravo said:
Having just scarfed one that was a pearl amongst horror bags, I'm reminded of some of the shite served to me in a paper bag elsewhere...

So lets hear the good and the bad... naming and shaming...

Last one; Granary roll, clingfilm wrapped. Individual Flora serving, individual chedder cheese portion; plastic knife with which to cut it. Cheese and vegetable slice. Bottle of mineral water, 2 finger KitKat, bag of chicken crisps, packet of KP peanuts, slice of fruit cake, apple.

7 RIFLES looks to be in good hands...

At an RTC I've visited - Sausage roll ( meat, non-specific - yeuch ), plain crisps, Panda Pop ( shudder... ) fluffy choc bun. An apple or orange. Sweet chocolate bar.

Spot the lowest bidder...
Ahh...The unidentified cheese & onion pastie... Cheese that you could use to tile the bathroom & raw onion....
The Cornish would be so proud... :twisted:
Worst one I had was on last year while away with the ACF,Same god awful pastie,molten club bar,crushed crisps,nuts,fruitcake & a bottle of bubblegum flavour pop!
Must be a template for vrap food allover.....Where's the Jammie Olive when you need him!!
Best one was on a jolly in a Nimrod from St Mawgan back to Kinloss....
Hot food!!Chicken curry,Pasta,cream cakes & not a horror bag in site!In fact it used to be a rush to a see-in to grab the scran left over by the crew!!(Each crew have a kitty & buy extras,just in case.....)
 
#4
Not quite defrosted sausage(?) rolls, a packet of Polos imparting a mint flavour to everything and a fizzy drink of very uncertain parentage.

Anytime from 1973 to 2006, anywhere I have served.
 
#5
Unfreezable Cornish pasties, reeking orange pop (in a bottle that contains less moisture than one of my beer farts), the cheapest salt and vinegar crisps known to man (crisps should not be shiny), red apple that’s been bounced around more than a naafi birds arrse.

If you argue over the bourbon biscuits, something has gone wrong.
 
#7
Pedo pop/rola cola pish water, Salmon paste butties with every bone present from the fish in the sandwich. Cheese possesed with minging tomato wrapped in cling film so as floppy as your knob asfter a night on the ale. Unbranded crips from feck knows were....made to a price not a standard!
 
#8
Those sausage rolls are the only food on God's green earth that my Border Collies turn their noses up at. They'll eat cow excreta, sheep excreta, decaying mammal, anything. But not those sausage rolls.

They look at you as if you're trying to poison them! I do tell them that a Eat By date of 2009 is a good thing, but they aren't buying it!!
 

jmj

Old-Salt
#12
psychobabble said:
Those sausage rolls are the only food on God's green earth that my Border Collies turn their noses up at.
The sausage rolls I can just about stomach, it's the "d shaped pasties" that really make me want to end it all.

Worst horror bags were BAS for a time, stale bread roll, tiny tiny piece of mystery meat, big slice of gherkin type thing. The vinegar from the gherkin would soak into the break and make it all slimy.. Bleurgh.. the flashbacks!

Best recently were from Castlemartin camp for our Regt's road trip back to the NE, which was a shock, as the cookhouse food had been totally gopping.
One of those make your own sandwich type affairs, but with fairly decent (non wrights bakery) contents.
 
#13
Worst one I ever had was quite recent. The sandwich consisted of a stale roll populated only with 1 lettuce leaf & 2 slices of cucumber. Not even a slab of 'Mystery Meat' to add that certain ' Je ne sais qois?'.

SS
 
#15
Aahhh the sausage rolls containing 15% meat(?)
Smiths crisps
Some random fruit slice thing (sponge with a quater of a cherry)
An apple that once was green, but now resembles an anal prolapse.
Panda pop blue throwing away for the use of.
Bourbon/digestive biscuits.

Feast of the gods really isnt it 8O
 
#16
Best one was on a jolly in a Nimrod from St Mawgan back to Kinloss....
Hot food!!Chicken curry,Pasta,cream cakes & not a horror bag in site!In fact it used to be a rush to a see-in to grab the scran left over by the crew!!(Each crew have a kitty & buy extras,just in case.....)[/quote]

That must have been a while ago, do remember doing a see off on a jet once and the crew delayed as they were waiting for "DCS material"

Inflight van roars onto the pan and delivers a Dairy Cream Sponge.
 
#17
The horror bags at BATUS were a sight to behold......

The 'Subs' (sandwiches) contained every revolting meat known to man, were about 3ft long, and were packed in plastic containing CO2 so they would have a half life of 3000 years.....Utterly disgusting......
 
#18
Dr_Dorian said:
Best one was on a jolly in a Nimrod from St Mawgan back to Kinloss....
Hot food!!Chicken curry,Pasta,cream cakes & not a horror bag in site!In fact it used to be a rush to a see-in to grab the scran left over by the crew!!(Each crew have a kitty & buy extras,just in case.....)
That must have been a while ago, do remember doing a see off on a jet once and the crew delayed as they were waiting for "DCS material"

Inflight van roars onto the pan and delivers a Dairy Cream Sponge.[/quote]

1986ish,my first posting,Kinloss LNS.
 
B

Bottleosmoke

Guest
#19
Hugh_Jardon said:
I once had one that was still frozen solid... the pastie started melting as I ate it :)
Probably as your nobber Troop commander had forfotten to book them and had only given the slops 10 minutes to prepare them.

Dont forget they only get .75p , or in that region, to make them so it depends on the creative accounting of your master chef.

Mind you, I was once at west down camp and the CO himslef opened his bag and found that his roll was just that, uncut, nothing in it, just a bread roll! He ordered everyone to hand theirs back and delivered them back to the contract caterers( accompanied by RSM). Although we had no lunch, we ate like kings that night!
 
#20
Bottleosmoke said:
Hugh_Jardon said:
I once had one that was still frozen solid... the pastie started melting as I ate it :)
Probably as your nobber Troop commander had forfotten to book them and had only given the slops 10 minutes to prepare them.

Dont forget they only get .75p , or in that region, to make them so it depends on the creative accounting of your master chef.

Mind you, I was once at west down camp and the CO himslef opened his bag and found that his roll was just that, uncut, nothing in it, just a bread roll! He ordered everyone to hand theirs back and delivered them back to the contract caterers( accompanied by RSM). Although we had no lunch, we ate like kings that night!
Food on the cheap!Funnily enogh,I was clearing out my Bergen last night & I found one of those cheese & onion pastes in the top pocket,crushed but still looked as horrid as it did in July! Last July I was away to Fremington Training camp with the ACF.That was civvie catering & the food varied from not bad to bloody aweful!We'd been there nearly a week & one of the SNCO's with me asked for a salad,especially as the weather was so hot. He was told no by the mess manager but the next day when he was off,low & behold.salads!! Apparently the civvie mess managers cushy little office job was 're-defined' so now he had to do a turn at the cooking as well!The majority of the chefs there were ex-regs &,when the mess manager was off,bent over backwards for us.One saw point with the W.O's was that we had to collect our scran from the cadets mess & walk it down to the Sgts mess as the hotplate was funked in our mess.Not a big deal in my book.And the Mess Manager wanted 48 hrs notice for stuff like horror bags which,according to the boss,was inappropriate because of the hot weather which meant the training programme changed daily & sometimes hourly! (At one point they had to contact the ACF H&S officer to see if it was too hot to train)
 

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