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Confessions of an Army Chef!

Since the ACC was scrapped in 93 in favour of RLC have standards dropped?


  • Total voters
    63
I served in five different barracks and the ACC were top lads, fukin animals on the drink though.
 
Not a lot of wives-of had recourse to a duty driver and that's who Nignoy was on about. I've seen wives at Mess Dos try and nick anything that wasn't nailed down before, that's why we made them pastillage caskets to hold their petit fours, so they could get a souvenir, but whole hams and suckling pigs just kicks the arse out of it.
(yeah, I know it's taken a year to give a reply, so fcuk off)
Think of the hams and pigs that have been taken in that year!
 
I loved army food; especially cooked breakfasts and hangover brunches. Filled my boots at every meal.

The chefs were as sound as **** - even if they were fat gopping slop jockeys of dubious personal hygiene, chronic alcoholism, and a reputation for engaging in squalid sexual encounters with bandsmen...

PAYD sounds like a miserable option.
...and not just bandsmen. One of the slops used to go bareback with one of the local Belizean girls in his spare time, the mingling flucker!

Master Chefs office in the afternoon to watch BFBS was the place to be. Happy times.


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Hard Rations

Old-Salt
Best thing I ever did, was remuster to the Cook Trade. No regrets and a fun trade. Had no problem getting well paid employment on civy street. Best time I had while in was my 6 months in CFS Alert where I had the Bake Shop.
 

Hard Rations

Old-Salt
mess buffets were a nightmare for chefs especially Sgts mess, senior ranks wives bring kin huge bags with them as soon as the buffet is declared open, hams and chickens in aspic ,salmon, barons of beef nothing is to big,I got pissed off with this at 11 inf REME sgts mess canalufer strasse in minden, when at the Christmas dance a centrepiece of 2 x 35lb baked wildboar hams and 4 spanferkel(roast piglet) disappeared without a chance of any one carving them!! So I planned a little surprise for the Valentines dance, The centrepiece of the buffet was a huge pink heart shaped cake covered in red roses,this cake was made out of mashed potato powder laced with tabasco sauce, paprika and dried chillies, and lots of syrup of figs,of course a few tots of rum to cover the smell, I put a label on it not to be eaten , contains non edible contents, it seemed to work but as the evening went on the ladies just could not help themselves, the whole cake disappeared, over the next few days multiple cases of explosive diarrhea were reported among the pads female population, I was given a severe talking to by Dixy Dean who was adjutant at that time but as I was up for demob not a lot could be done!!, ,

New Years day: Officers Mess in RCAF Winnipeg: Decorated assorted meats, fowl, fish, etc all on display. One of the waitresses informs me that an RCMP officer (Inspector) was taking off into the parking lot with decorated turkey on the sliver platter. I took chase and using some inappropriate language on him ( I was informed this was not nice), bugger got to his car and took off. Apparently it was put on display at their mess for their New Years day open house. We got the tray back. Often wondered if I should have called the M.P.s at the main gate and had him detained. Would have been fun seeing a Meat Head taking in a Mountie.
 
I remember an old WO2 chef in the early 1980s who was said to have learnt his trade in the German Army in Russia during WW2, the maths sort of work. Wished I'd had the foresight to ask him about his early life.

There were times on the razzle when he seemed to drift off back to the steppes ........ "You don't know what cold is boy!"
 
A certain SO2 Catering on Telic, I'll call him Larry the Bastard to preserve his opsec, closed down the HQ complex brew area the day after we moved into Iraq. He said it was dirty and insanitary.

Dôwnês, by any chance?
 
During GW1, during the actual land invasion thingy, we'd been on the move (very slowly) for about 24 hours and during a lull in the crawl, the chefs - because it was windy and sand was flying about - dug a 12 x 12 tent into the desert and started preparing us a hot meal.

I stuck my head into the tent, took a look around and exclaimed "What; no ******* chips?" (for a joke), and Sgt Wren ACC smashed me in the face with a ladle.
 
So the training the chefs recieved in 94 was dumbed down to what those recieved in 93 then?
Even though it was the same instructors and all were being trained at NVQ and B-Tech standards. How is that dumbed down, or were military chefs (all 3 services trained at St Omer at that time) trained better than there civilian counterparts (probably, but I'm biased)?

Because of the civilian qualifications (NVQ & B-Tech) all training is standardised(sp). If anything, I would say training is probably more in depth now, as chefs have to learn about diet (calories/sugars/fats) as well as learning how to cook. Plus they need to have a basic understanding of COSHH.acc apprentice chefs in the late 50,s early 60,s had to study catering science as part of their qualifications!! who the FXXX do you you think managed the Diet Kitchens, in the military hospitals round the globe, definitely not the planks that took over when ACC gave up the Badge

From your argument, pretty much every chef from Sgt downwards that is serving at the moment, isn't as good as any chef before, because they were not ACC. So I take it by your argument all the Scottish regts are not as good any more as they have all been placed into one large unit.

Get a life.
 

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