Coming out stories!

Discussion in 'Int Corps' started by CRmeansCeilingReached, Oct 25, 2005.

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  1. having just had it implied that i might be a raving bender on another thread :? ... i thought "there must be some funny stories of people being outed / coming out the closet" - let's face it, we have had our share of deviants over the years!

    so to get the ball rolling... somebody at a certain Security Section (no names, no pack drill) at a leaving do:

    (By the way, both of these people are male)

    "You know, when you first turned up at the Section, someone had a real crush on you."

    (Chuffed to f*ck, puffs out chest with pride) "Oh really...?"

    "Yeah, and it wasn't one of the girls!!!"

    winks suggestively, grabs arrse and tries to make like a sailor. ok, so i made that bit up :)

    any more for any more? and does anyone know the Politically Correct term for 'raving bender', as I haven't done my equality ITD for at least 3 weeks now and can't remember.
  2. ** Coy, NI some years back. Had a Sgt front up to the RSM and express his preferences. He was one of those Am Dram people as well.
  3. The BK of HQ Battery 103 AD regt. finally decided that he could not go on living a lie and so decided to resign his commission and live a full life as a homosexualist, without fear of the SIB! His courage cannot be doubted because he paraded the battery (hardened scousers to a man) and informed them of his orientation! What balls, what insane was that?!
  4. Used to drink late into the night with a load of regulars at a bar in Cyprus. Once gave a male Cypriot member of the group a lift home as he was a mate and a bit worse for wear. It took me all my control not to punch his lights out when he told me about his 'feelings' for me.

    Never had a clue at all up until that point. He was mortified following the event with tales of all links with family being severed etc if the truth ever came out. It never did from my point of view.

    To confirm - unsolicited attention and most unwelcome. Interesting to watch how he acted with others that didn't know his secret after that episode tho'!!
  5. "enjoying an alternatvie lifestyle"

    or stick with the old classics....

    brown hatter
    uphill gardener
    fart knocker
    fudge nudger
    batty boy
    pillow biter

    am sure the rest of you can fill in the gaps.

  6. Int Corps Operator

    Shirt lifter
    bats for the other side
  8. my old man was a fitter n turner in the the ACC back when i was a nipper and was allowed to go home to visit me mum from Germany on the grounds she was having a difficult time with the pregnancy of my little brother... he was granted compassionate leave if he escorted a prisoner to Colchester then he could take a long weekend then report back to base in Germany... he opted to drive as he was massive compared to said glasshouse tennant and thought it would be a peice of piss....

    so they depart from paderborn i think, and head across Germany and Holland, then belgium then france with a few ammsuing stories gererated by toilet stops for said crim...who at one stop pretended my old man was the naughty boy and these old ladies were tutting at my dad....who then broke the crims nose for shits and giggles.

    During the journey my dad couldnt get the bloke to tell him what he had done, so upon arriving in colchester - said to the duty mate - what did this bloke do?

    answer - oh not much - found his gay lover in bed with another man and butchered both of them with a kitchen knife.

    my dad who didnt have the keys to the cuffs was none too impressed at this news and proceeded to try to rip the mans arm clean off.

  9. Unbelieveable, I cannot believe that this is common practice, is it? Surely this got out like wildfire and the person in question quite rightly kept his lifestyle choices/practices to himself or was treated with disdain.

    These ******* (arf arf) can do all they want in their own time but the Army is not the place to proclaim their tastes. Thank you decriminalisation :roll:
  10. Early 80s in Lippstadt there was a lad who was outed by his mail. :)

    He had the same name as one of the Sqn grown ups and said grown up got some of his mail by mistake.

    Turns out it was a love letter complete with graphic details.

    Que one investigation and SNLR for said squaddie.

    Now the twist in the tale is that it seems that the bender had sent these letters himself??

    Wanted out but couldn't afford/was to tight to pay the PVR. So he hit upon this little scheme to get him out in the fastest time.

    Or he was a screaming bender who made up the story to stop him getting beat to death down town?

    Never did make my mind up which was the true version.
  11. We media types refer to them as "Hollywood's most eligible bachelors."
  12. Bosnia 98. One of my guys replied to a very forward young woman in a dubious contact magazine. The nubile sex-bomb he was writing to - (who wrote back, oddly, using a word processor) transpired to be a male soldier from another locationand unit in guessed it Bosnia!

    "He" was rumbled when a female colleague found one of the letters he had recieved, not just from my man but also many others! Not surprisingly a number of my guys got to meet the individual and he may have blushed a little bit...
  13. don't worry, i believe it was his leaving do for getting out (not just coming out) :)

    anyway its the old thing... you have worked with "these people" for years, you just didnt know it. it only becomes a problem when you find out. having worked with several gay men and women over the years (and a couple of dubious ones ;)), i can honestly say i've never had a problem with it professionally. and certainly it has never reflected on their ability in the job.

    but then again, ive probably never had a problem cos im too fat and ugly to be attractive to men OR women :D
  14. maninblack

    maninblack LE Book Reviewer

    In Aldershot we had a young gentleman who in spite of repeated visits in his room by civvie "gentlemen" at all hours was still so far back in the closet that his postal address was BFPO Narnia.

    Nobody really seemed to mind that he was a closet queen but he was really unpopular due to his side activities as a born again christian trying to convert the unit.
  15. Ho ho ho!

    Edited to add: When did the army rescind the rule on Homosexuality; it must have been quite surreal knowing that you had gay colleagues, but they could be "captured" by the SIB. And do you think the SIB thought it was a waste of time themselves?