Cohen brothers films....

#1
I shoud start this rant...er post, by admitting I despise cinema, theatre, actors, opera, ballet in fact "the arts" full stop.... I am apparently a "joyless soul" but there it is.... anyway...where was I?

The f ucking Cohen brothers....

Earlier this year, those c unts stole 2 and a half hours of my life, cunningly disguised as a film entitled "No country for old men"... Which SHOULD of been called "A rambling pile of scheisse with no discernible plot, or end"

They've done it again....

In a moment of tired weakness, I slotted in an old DVD to kill some time having heard all sorts of good things about it, it's an old film called "The big Lebowski" and apparently its a "cult classic"

Well f uck my old boots, lets see ...the plot... money... goes missing.... rambles on a bit... no discernible story line,... some f ucking awful acting from people who should know better.... AND no end..... can't they f ucking THINK of an end, or do they knock off for the Sabbath or something?

thats 5 hours those pr icks owe me.... and the tally grows if you add "O Brother where art thou" and the f ucking awful remake of "the Lady killers" they made...

and yet, people lap this shite up like its manna from heaven, and treat these f ucking front wheelers like they're geniuses....

How did these c unts escape the final solution? that's what I want to know.

This has been a film review by Shortfuse, hope it helps you retain a part of your life that you would otherwise of wasted.
 
#2
I'll let the anti-semitism ride. Bad taste old boy.

As you are in the wrong field looking at cinema I would have spared you the full film, whatever its glory. You should have tried this instead. It is probably about your level.

Lebowski
 
#3
I'd recommend that you watch "Fargo" or "Raising Arizona" but frankly they'd be wasted on any Philistine who doesn't dig El Duderino.


but you're spot on about "The Ladykillers"
 
#4
Shortfuse,

I guess the clue is in the name - but frankly, if you don't get The Big Lebowski, there's no hope for you. The Coen brothers (note the spelling) are richer than you're ever gonna be - and they also make films that a lot of people like and understand. And find very funny. This is called art.

If you don't understand the concept of art, cinema, or the fact that the the aforementioned film is extremely funny while not actually having a plot or being about anything in particular, then try not to venture out of the WOs and Sgts mess too often...

And leave the anti-semite thing there, while you're at it.

Get out more.

Adjt

[The Dude abides]
 
#8
Adjutant said:
Shortfuse,

I guess the clue is in the name - but frankly, if you don't get The Big Lebowski, there's no hope for you. The Coen brothers (note the spelling) are richer than you're ever gonna be - and they also make films that a lot of people like and understand. And find very funny. This is called art.

If you don't understand the concept of art, cinema, or the fact that the the aforementioned film is extremely funny while not actually having a plot or being about anything in particular, then try not to venture out of the WOs and Sgts mess too often...

And leave the anti-semite thing there, while you're at it.

Get out more.

Adjt

[The Dude abides]
Why do you assume anyone with a differing opinion to yours would reside in the WO's and Sgt's mess?

bit "chippy" isn't it?

I guess the clues in your username... do people avoid you at mess functions?

does your soup often taste "a bit salty?"

If Jeff Bridges rambling on in a half arsed fashion whilst constantly smoking the crappest joints I've ever f ucking seen, (I mean who taught the c unt how to skin up for f ucks sake, I've seen better joints rolled by blokes so caned they cant speak with one eye shut) is what you call "art" then I suspect you live in Tracy Emmins bedroom and have been touching mens winkies all your life.

and who made you chief Rabbi?

Tube.
 
#11
frenchie said:
You should try watching 'There will be blood' then. I think it may just tip you over the edge!
AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAARGH

Was that them aswell???

7.5 Hours!!

What a steaming pile of turd...it was more melodramatic than class 4b of Springmeads "speshul" school's nativity play this year, you know the one, when the lad dressed as the donkey fudged up in his strides and fell off the stage drooling and someone realised the "star" was actually a Balloon and the entire cast all ran after it frothing from their large round heads...

WTF was Daniel Day Lewis doing dressed up (and acting as) Dick Dastardly?

why can't they just have the balls to admit they can't think of endings for their films and do what Spike Milligan did at the end of his sketches, when he just wandered off muttering "whadd're we gonna do now?" repeatedly...

I mean, in an ideal world, reading the script, and seeing "And then, god botherer gets beaten to death with bowling pin, and lead actor sits and giggles" gets my vote, but not if I've just wasted my life for 2.5 hours building up to it.... why didn't he just pan the f uck out of him 30 minutes in and I could've been doing something less boring like counting my head.
 
#12
Nah it wasn't but what a shocking film.

I watched 'No country for old men' the following day. Missed the end as it looked like an opportune moment to make a brew with them sat around the table spouting nonsense. Poked my head back in and was left rather confused that it had ended.
 
H

Hedphelym

Guest
#13
shortfuse said:
Adjutant said:
Shortfuse,

I guess the clue is in the name - but frankly, if you don't get The Big Lebowski, there's no hope for you. The Coen brothers (note the spelling) are richer than you're ever gonna be - and they also make films that a lot of people like and understand. And find very funny. This is called art.

If you don't understand the concept of art, cinema, or the fact that the the aforementioned film is extremely funny while not actually having a plot or being about anything in particular, then try not to venture out of the WOs and Sgts mess too often...

And leave the anti-semite thing there, while you're at it.

Get out more.

Adjt

[The Dude abides]
Why do you assume anyone with a differing opinion to yours would reside in the WO's and Sgt's mess?

bit "chippy" isn't it?

I guess the clues in your username... do people avoid you at mess functions?

does your soup often taste "a bit salty?"

If Jeff Bridges rambling on in a half arsed fashion whilst constantly smoking the crappest joints I've ever f ucking seen, (I mean who taught the c unt how to skin up for f ucks sake, I've seen better joints rolled by blokes so caned they cant speak with one eye shut) is what you call "art" then I suspect you live in Tracy Emmins bedroom and have been touching mens winkies all your life.

and who made you chief Rabbi?

Tube.
You are seriously having a go at a film because of the quality of joints?
Sorry to be a bit blunt (No pun intended), but that's pretty sad. I feel bad for you that it's got to you that much.

It's a bit clear you just don't seem to get it - or film in general for that matter. My advice? Don't watch any ever again.

Just practise rolling those joints, it's such an amazing skill - and it really opens doors for you!
 
#14
The Cohen brothers are superb, 'O Brother Where art Thou' is one of the best films I have seen, ever.

I am surprised that you don't seem to get their tounge in cheek approach. to subtle?

I would be interested to know what you would like?
 
#15
Techtechtech said:
The Cohen brothers are superb, 'O Brother Where art Thou' is one of the best films I have seen, ever.

I am surprised that you don't seem to get their tounge in cheek approach. to subtle?

I would be interested to know what you would like?
Not Cohen Brothers but Syriana (George Clooney) and Babel (Brad Pitt & others) are also two films well worthy of seeing again.

The most recent film I have seen which I would recommend unreservedly is 'The Lives of Others' which portrays life under the Stasi in East Germany. Its in german with subtitles but this just adds to its appeal.
 
#16
I read Cormac Carthy's book ' No Country for Old Men' which the Coen boys filmed almost verbatim from Carthy's tome. In this instant the Coens have followed the author's will.

As for 'O Brother' 'Fargo' et al my daughter used these films in her uni dissirtation and I was obliged to watch them over and over again with infomed input. To be frank I'm a fan.
 
#18
shortfuse said:
I shoud start this rant...er post, by admitting I despise cinema, theatre, actors, opera, ballet in fact "the arts" full stop.... I am apparently a "joyless soul" but there it is.... anyway...where was I?

The f ucking Cohen brothers....

Earlier this year, those c unts stole 2 and a half hours of my life, cunningly disguised as a film entitled "No country for old men"... Which SHOULD of been called "A rambling pile of scheisse with no discernible plot, or end"

They've done it again....

In a moment of tired weakness, I slotted in an old DVD to kill some time having heard all sorts of good things about it, it's an old film called "The big Lebowski" and apparently its a "cult classic"

Well f uck my old boots, lets see ...the plot... money... goes missing.... rambles on a bit... no discernible story line,... some f ucking awful acting from people who should know better.... AND no end..... can't they f ucking THINK of an end, or do they knock off for the Sabbath or something?

thats 5 hours those pr icks owe me.... and the tally grows if you add "O Brother where art thou" and the f ucking awful remake of "the Lady killers" they made...

and yet, people lap this shite up like its manna from heaven, and treat these f ucking front wheelers like they're geniuses....

How did these c unts escape the final solution? that's what I want to know.

This has been a film review by Shortfuse, hope it helps you retain a part of your life that you would otherwise of wasted.
I would be prepared to bet that this injustice will not stand.
 
#19
The Coen brothers are some of the few film makers worth watching these days.

However, if this little turd's rant is anything to go by I guess the Hollywood execs are right whent hey say you'll never go poor by underestimating the stupidity of your audience. If subtle humour, great writing and good direction aren't your thing then fear not, I'm sure the makers of such lowest-common-denominator dross such as Epic Movie or Meet teh Spartens will be more than happy to take your money.

Leave the decent films to the adults, there's a good chap.
 
#20
bobath_lost_his_account said:
The Coen brothers are some of the few film makers worth watching these days.

However, if this little turd's rant is anything to go by I guess the Hollywood execs are right whent hey say you'll never go poor by underestimating the stupidity of your audience. If subtle humour, great writing and good direction aren't your thing then fear not, I'm sure the makers of such lowest-common-denominator dross such as Epic Movie or Meet teh Spartens will be more than happy to take your money.

Leave the decent films to the adults, there's a good chap.
Ah... the age old argument trotted out by people with a misguided sense of intellectual superiority...

"I like it.... if you don't, then you're stupid and you don't get it"

Same crap spouted by the "art establishment" to justify some of the turd knocking about and labelled as "Art" these days...it's normally coupled with a sneering derision of the person/group of people who put their hand up and said "You know what....actually this is a bit crap"

I get it, I understand it, it's subtle to the point of inducing snores... it's called "boring"

No wonder you get it, I've just read a couple of your posts, i'd of read more but you're a boring c unt and I nearly fell asleep.... you should change your name to "Nytol"
 

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