clean the crapper & cat at the same time

Discussion in 'The NAAFI Bar' started by armourer, Jul 4, 2004.

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  1. fair use of pussy

    78.6%
  2. unfair use of pussy

    21.4%

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  1. 1. Put both lids of the toilet up and add 1/8 cup of pet shampoo to the water in the bowl.

    2. Pick up the cat and soothe him while you carry it towards the bathroom.

    3. In one smooth movement,put the cat in the toilet and close both lids. You may need to stand on the lid.

    4. The cat will self agitate and make ample bubbles. Never mind the noise that comes from the toilet,the cat is actually enjoying this.

    5. Flush the toilet three or four times. This provides a "power-wash" and rinse".

    6. Have someone open the front door of your home. Be sure no one is between the bathroom and the front door.

    7. Stand behind the toilet as far as you can, and quickly lift both lids.

    8. The cat will rocket out of the toilet,streak through the bathroom, and run outside where it will dry itself off.

    9. Both the toilet and the cat will be sparkling clean.
     
  2. Or the cat will die of shock, or just drown.

    Other things to note is that the cat will have a good try at scratching your eyes out and then placing you in the toilet.

    Apart from the above, good idea.
     
  3. Should the cat be put in head or feet first or does it not matter?

    Would the use of a lead weighted collar be advantageous?
     
  4. Head first that way he can use the tail to get under the rim
     
  5. easespring
    Does the breed of cat matter?
    long haired breeds working better,
    or do they tend to lose hair faster from shock?
    and is it better to use the neighbours cat?
    BBC
     
  6. Always better to use someone elses that way they get to deal with the mess and you can play the innocent caring neighbour. Don't use long haired you will end up with a furry seat
     
  7. Do you have any alternative suggetions if you do not have a cat to hand?

    Whilst i do regularly resort to the tried and tested method of Alpine Fresh and bog brush, this does on occasions fail to remove the rogan josh deposit from a Friday nights binge?

    Would a small puppy or rabbit provide the same affect, failing that could i apply the same method to my neighbours young child?
     
  8. Use the child, use the child, Use the child, use the child, Use the child, use the child, Use the child, use the child, Use the child, use the child, Use the child, use the child, Use the child, use the child, Use the child, use the child, Use the child, use the child, Use the child, use the child, Use the child, use the child, then film it and post it on ARRSE for all to see :twisted: :twisted:
     
  9. I prefer to use a hedgehog on a kebab skewer smeared in bleach for those hard to shift week old cack stains............. :twisted: :wink:
     
  10. Definately! I feckin' hate ankle-biters! :twisted:
     
  11. to clean right round the bend , use a slack handfull of hamsters , they're expendable.
     
  12. How To Clean Your Toilet - The Fun Way



    1. Put both lids of the toilet up and add 1/8 cup of pet shampoo to the water in the bowl.


    2. Pick up the cat and soothe him while you carry him towards the bathroom.


    3. In one smooth movement, put the cat in the toilet and close both lids.


    4. You may need to stand on the lid.


    5. The cat will self agitate and make ample suds. Never mind the noises that come from the toilet, the cat is actually enjoying this


    6. Flush the toilet three or four times. This provides a "power-wash" and rinse".


    7. Have someone open the front door of your home. Be sure that there are no people between the bathroom and the front door.


    8. Stand behind the toilet as far as you can, and quickly lift both lids.


    9. The cat will rocket out of the toilet, streak through the bathroom, and run outside where he will dry himself off.


    10. Both the toilet and the cat will be sparkling clean.
     
  13. has worked well for me,
    have you just discovered this :wink: :lol:
     
  14. Does it work with guinea pigs? If so I might fight her for custody of 'em :D
     
  15. My dog is scared of the bathroom since I tried to get the little git in the bath after he had been rolling in fox pooh. Little baystard.

    He will get in the bed, but will not go in the bathroom.

    Takes after his stinking dad (Mr Snail).