Clapping and appplause at funerals. Is it appropiate.

slick

LE
I find the clapping distinctly odd, clapping to me has always been a way of saying well done or good show, for what... well done for getting blown to bits, good show on stopping an enemy bullet, well done that man/woman for dying in battle. By all means get razzled at the wake, have a laugh and a joke and celebrate the persons life there, but clapping when the coffin is passing seems quite weird. I half expect the dead person to sit up as the cortege goes past and say "What the feck are you clapping for, I`m dead and I`d much rather be alive".
 
steve3883 said:
I find the clapping at Military Funerals innapropriate, it seems to be the norm now though unfortuantely.

Not very British in my opinion.

Steve
Deference is a Lost Icon; but silence is more profound.

It leaves people to hear their thoughts, amidst the cocophony. 'Noise' is everywhere, musak, we're too insecure to stop and listen to 'other sounds'.
 
chocolate_frog said:
Just check out the "road side shrines" as evidence of that.
Only place to shop for the Wifes flowers for me and the odd cuddly toy for the kids.
 

Biped

LE
Book Reviewer
Sinner251 said:
chocolate_frog said:
Just check out the "road side shrines" as evidence of that.
Only place to shop for the Wifes flowers for me and the odd cuddly toy for the kids.
That gets a round of applause! :D
 
Biped said:
Sinner251 said:
chocolate_frog said:
Just check out the "road side shrines" as evidence of that.
Only place to shop for the Wifes flowers for me and the odd cuddly toy for the kids.
That gets a round of applause! :D
Actually pick up some flowers like this once for the Monster in law when she was in Hospital raising my Hopes for her demise. I was sorely disapointed.
 
A

ALVIN

Guest
Yes, the clapping is for the efforts of what the fallen did, so others can live in safety and freedom.
 
It certainly can be appropriate. When the mother of a friend of mine faltered during the eulogy, the congregation started clapping in orde, I think, to show support for her: that seemed entirely fitting at the time. Perhaps the "to clap or not to clap?" question comes down to context.
 

slick

LE
ALVIN said:
Yes, the clapping is for the efforts of what the fallen did, so others can live in safety and freedom.
If thats the case will you be at the Cenotaph clapping on Remembrance day then, I suspect you would get short shrift.
 
_Artemis_ said:
It certainly can be appropriate. When the mother of a friend of mine faltered during the eulogy, the congregation started clapping in orde, I think, to show support for her: that seemed entirely fitting at the time. Perhaps the "to clap or not to clap?" question comes down to context.
A slow hand clap might not have been as fitting :twisted:
 
chocolate_frog said:
_Artemis_ said:
It certainly can be appropriate. When the mother of a friend of mine faltered during the eulogy, the congregation started clapping in orde, I think, to show support for her: that seemed entirely fitting at the time. Perhaps the "to clap or not to clap?" question comes down to context.
A slow hand clap might not have been as fitting :twisted:
Sorry, didn't I convey that that was what we did? Along with calls of "hurry up, we've been here 10 minutes already" and "you're shit and you know you are" :D
 
_Artemis_ said:
chocolate_frog said:
_Artemis_ said:
It certainly can be appropriate. When the mother of a friend of mine faltered during the eulogy, the congregation started clapping in orde, I think, to show support for her: that seemed entirely fitting at the time. Perhaps the "to clap or not to clap?" question comes down to context.
A slow hand clap might not have been as fitting :twisted:
Sorry, didn't I convey that that was what we did? Along with calls of "hurry up, we've been here 10 minutes already" and "you're shit and you know you are" :D
I hope you join me in hell for writing that1!!!

The image of your freinds mum being harranged so just caused me giggle :twisted:

"what are you waiting for? His reincarnation?"
 

chinooksdad

Old-Salt
In some Indian cultures wives throw themselves on the funeral pyres. And we're moaning about a bit of handclapping. Until they start throwing themsleves in the freshly dug graves, just let 'em get on with it. As long as they don't start cheering, hooping and hollering that is!!!
 

BuggerAll

LE
Kit Reviewer
Book Reviewer
Does it come down to people not knowing what is 'expected' of them or what is 'appropriate' or indeed inappropriate behavior at any given occasion and a lack of willingness to point people in the right direction for fear of being thought proscriptive or elitist.

Not just on this issue but people are often reluctant to tell people what to wear at parties or to correct ill manners. I most people are not deliberately rude they simply don't know how to behave and society is too timid to tell them.
 
A

ALVIN

Guest
slick said:
ALVIN said:
Yes, the clapping is for the efforts of what the fallen did, so others can live in safety and freedom.
If thats the case will you be at the Cenotaph clapping on Remembrance day then, I suspect you would get short shrift.
What is wrong with clapping as all the old veterans pass the Cenotaph? --- I am a veteran myself, i would feel quite chuffed if someone were clapping at me. :D
 
BuggerAll said:
Does it come down to people not knowing what is 'expected' of them or what is 'appropriate' or indeed inappropriate behavior at any given occasion and a lack of willingness to point people in the right direction for fear of being thought proscriptive or elitist.
A good point, I wonder if, over the course of time, people are less familiar with funerals (apart from celebrity ones of course!).

Of course, people are dying at the same rate and funerals are still no doubt well attended by contemporaries but lots of folk are growing up without extended families and with grandparents often about 36+ years old.

A few generations ago, funerals were someone you grew up with, with aunts and uncles, grandparents and so on popping off seemingly quite
frequently at a comparatively earlier age.

Similar thing with church services too, I certainly wasn't a church-goer but for one reason or another I'd been to a lot of services before I left school and I'm not sure in this multi-faith age this would be the case nowadays.
 

Argee2007

War Hero
I don't really find it appropriate, all that's missing from this type of thing is some american shouting 'In the hole!!!!'.
 
I am no expert on such occasions but have been to an increasing number of funerals in recent years due to my ever increasing age and trying to attend as many military funerals as possible in my area. To a great degree this depends on the faith background of the deceased and his or her family. Some denominations regard funerals differently than the more staid and traditional main line ones in that they believe the departed is indeed in a better place (Heaven) and thus the funeral should celebrate this as well as a life hopefully well-lived.

Perhaps more to your point given this is a military forum, I have not seen such expressions at funerals done with formal military honors. There are characterized by somber dignity even though the faith tradition of the dead being honored would otherwise be to celebrate less formally.

I suppose the thing that characterizes military funerals here when contrasted to those of some years ago would be the presence of "honor guards" of motorcyclists who have taken it upon themselves to try to screen the ceremony from disruption by various anti-war groups and one rather aberrant "church" in the midwest that has very extreme political views and has disrupted some military funerals.


'Hope this helps.
 

slick

LE
ALVIN said:
slick said:
ALVIN said:
Yes, the clapping is for the efforts of what the fallen did, so others can live in safety and freedom.
If thats the case will you be at the Cenotaph clapping on Remembrance day then, I suspect you would get short shrift.
What is wrong with clapping as all the old veterans pass the Cenotaph? --- I am a veteran myself, i would feel quite chuffed if someone were clapping at me. :D
There is a difference between applauding veterans as they walk past and applauding a dead body in a funeral cortege. It should be a moment of quiet reflection, would you ever hear anyone clapping during the two minutes silence.
I think BuggerAll summed it up nicely with this comment :)
they simply don't know how to behave and society is too timid to tell them
 
slick said:
ALVIN said:
slick said:
ALVIN said:
Yes, the clapping is for the efforts of what the fallen did, so others can live in safety and freedom.
If thats the case will you be at the Cenotaph clapping on Remembrance day then, I suspect you would get short shrift.
What is wrong with clapping as all the old veterans pass the Cenotaph? --- I am a veteran myself, i would feel quite chuffed if someone were clapping at me. :D
There is a difference between applauding veterans as they walk past and applauding a dead body in a funeral cortege. It should be a moment of quiet reflection, would you ever hear anyone clapping during the two minutes silence.
I think BuggerAll summed it up nicely with this comment :)
they simply don't know how to behave and society is too timid to tell them
Perhaps herein lies the problem. Civvies do not know the difference. They have seen returning soldiers march through towns and being applauded. They then transpose that onto the return of the fallen. A quick lesson in etiquette before the cortege arrives may help. Or perhaps it being pointed out that if they would not applaud the arrival of the coffin of their own loved ones, is it really appropriate to do it to the arrival of someone else's loved one?
 

alib

LE
Fallschirmjager said:
Clapping and appplause at funerals. Is it appropiate.
I find wailing and gnashing of teeth much more socially acceptable.
Clapping is not appropriate. Its not bloody Wimbledon or a fifth form speech day.

Spot of keening, bitter arguments over the deceased goods and some drunken fighting. Least that's the Irish way.
 

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