This is one for the bikers.

A couple of weeks ago I had a work meeting at one of the conference theatres above @ Bristol. I parked my bike near the building and chained it to a post. When I parked I saw a clamping sign on the other side of some bollards, in a pedestrian area, so I purposefully parked on the road side of the bollards and chained my bike to the only post in the area to make it more secure. When I came out of the meeting later I saw that they had clamped my bike, the cnuts. Not only that but they charged me £68.25 to release it, the same release fee as a car. As you can see in the pictures, it wasn't blocking the pavement or restricting anyone's movements.

This is the first time I've ever seen a bike clamped, I didn't even know they did clamps for bikes. The best bit was when I rang up and they said they were going to tow it in half an hour, so they were blatantly saying they were going to cut through my chain.

If any bikers have to go to @ Bristol, don't try and park anywhere near it.


It was done by a private clamping company, and work wouldn't let me claim it back on parking :cry:
whiffler said:
They don't drag most things, they lift them away.
They still would have had to cut through my chain, the post was about 10 feet tall, no way they could lift it over.
You should have waited for the clamper to come back and rammed your jap bike right up his back box. :D

Last tiem I was clamped I called an oppo and he grinded it off and left the clamp there, I got a series of phonecalls and nothing happened.

I called the old bill to tell them I had done it and he in a round about way told me not to confess to damaging it as he would have to do something about it. He said 'without his police hat' well done.

Why didn't you 'Wheelie' all the way home?
Run down to a tool hire place, get the biggest baddest angle grinder you can see, with a disc for hardened steel, and cut the shaggin thing off.

Of else a blow torch, but I'd recommend against unless you've experience- or can persuade someone from the tool place to come with you.

And may I mention Anglegrinderman?

I know of three fellas who have their own little ways: One fella managed to get a hold of a clamp, and clamps his own damm car, putting relevant coloured papers on the windscreen.

One fella has worked out that if he jacks the car, deflates the tire completely, he can wriggle it off and then reinflate the tire using those handy pumps. I think he could get at the valve, some clamps cover everything. The ones used by cork city council do, anyway.

Last fella was a fireman, and called the lads with the jaws of life? Big, powered bolt cutter for cutting people out of wrecked cars? The clamp didn't go easily, but it did eventually. and they were gone just as the scum arrived.

There are only a few clamping companies in Cork, and their areas of operation are limited to certain problem areas, as far as I know.

However, one particular company clamped a Garda supers car and insisted he pay. For a fortnight, whenever a vehicle from that company was seen by gardai to be causing an obstruction: ie, crew clamping or removing a car, the vehicle got a ticket and a summons.
This continued until the super got a letter cancelling all charges. Then the gardai pressed charges for every ticket issued. Balance: If someone acts the bollocks, the gardai can always up the ante.
I was going to ring my uncle up, but I remembered he'd just sold his angle grinder. Plus, there was a CCTV camera near, as well as being next to the building with security walking around inside. I didn't want to try a wheelie all the way home because if I stopped then the clamp would have wrecked the fron wheel. lol
Make a complaint to the clamper and police. If they said they were going to tow it away and that would mean cutting your chain, then they have broken the law as it is an offence to threaten to destroy or damage property. Its a long shot as they migh be able to state that they had lawful authority or reasonable excuse but it might be worth putting the shiites up them for a bit. Next time cover your index plates up. As far as I am aware they cannot issue a ticket or clamp you if your plates are hidden.
I would have moved it by lifting the front to a legal place to stop and then rung the company up and complain to the police. Ot just got a trailer and taken it home. Pick off the clamp at your leisure.
SuperTrooper said:
If they said they were going to tow it away and that would mean cutting your chain, then they have broken the law as it is an offence to threaten to destroy or damage property.
It was the guy on the phone that said it was being towed in 30 minutes, he probably didn't know it was chained, but he knew the exact location it was parked.
It's worth checking to see if the company actually has a license to clamp, and followed all the red tape - local authorities have been cracking down on illegal clampers for a while now. Could always chat to CAB.


TA_s, they did have a licence, they are quite a big company that operates a lot in that area. That was the first thing I looked at.
Balls to that idea then.

Could always get your mate Big Ern to go and have a word. Or just appeal and investigate the possibillity of 'threats' of crim damage to your bike - as already suggested.

Pay the fine personally at their premises, then burn the fcuking place down a week or two later - preferably with the cnuts in it.

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