Civilian V Service friends

Discussion in 'The NAAFI Bar' started by Blind_Pew, Apr 24, 2007.

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  1. CIVILIAN FRIENDS: Get upset if you are too busy to talk to them for a week.

    SERVICE FRIENDS: Are glad to see you after many years; and will happily carry on the same conversation you were having last time you met.



    CIVILIAN FRIENDS: Never ask for food.

    SERVICE FRIENDS: Are the reason you have no food.



    CIVILIAN FRIENDS: Call your parents Mr. and Mrs.

    SERVICE FRIENDS: Call your parents Mum and Dad.



    CIVILIAN FRIENDS: Bail you out of jail and then tell you what you did was wrong.

    SERVICE FRIENDS: Would be sitting next to you saying, 'Mate...we stuffed up ....but wasn't that fun!'



    CIVILIAN FRIENDS: Have never seen you cry.

    SERVICE FRIENDS: Cry with you.



    CIVILIAN FRIENDS: Borrow your stuff for a few days then give it back.

    SERVICE FRIENDS: Keep your stuff so long they forget it is yours.



    CIVILIAN FRIENDS: Know a few things about you.

    SERVICE FRIENDS: Could write a book with a shed full of direct quotes from you.



    CIVILIAN FRIENDS: Will leave you behind if that is what the crowd is doing.

    SERVICE FRIENDS: Will kick the backsides of whole crowds that left you behind.



    CIVILIAN FRIENDS: Would knock on your door.

    SERVICE FRIENDS: Walk right in and say, 'I'm home, do you want a beer!'



    CIVILIAN FRIENDS: Share a few experiences.

    SERVICE FRIENDS: Share a lifetime of experiences no civilian could ever dream of.



    CIVILIAN FRIENDS: Will take your drink away when they think you've had enough.

    SERVICE FRIENDS: Will look at you stumbling all over the place and say, 'You had better drink the rest of that, you know we never waste it. Then they carry you home and put you safely to bed.



    CIVILIAN FRIENDS: Will talk crap to the person who talks crap about you.

    SERVICE FRIENDS: Will knock the crap out of people who use your name in vain.



    CIVILIAN FRIENDS: Are for a while.

    SERVICE FRIENDS: Are for life.
     
  2. awwww how touching *sob sob*
     
  3. And how worryingly accurate.
     
  4. CIVILIAN FRIENDS: Get upset if you are too busy to talk to them for a week.

    SERVICE FRIENDS: Don't care as they've been humping your wife and/or girlfriend.


    CIVILIAN FRIENDS: Never ask for food.

    SERVICE FRIENDS: Never ask for food without a drink.


    CIVILIAN FRIENDS: Call your parents Mr. and Mrs.

    SERVICE FRIENDS: Question if you have any particularly a father.


    CIVILIAN FRIENDS: Bail you out of jail and then tell you what you did was wrong.

    SERVICE FRIENDS: Laugh like fcuk because it was YOU that got caught.


    CIVILIAN FRIENDS: Have never seen you cry.

    SERVICE FRIENDS: Make you cry but then what else would they do with that CS cannister.


    CIVILIAN FRIENDS: Borrow your stuff for a few days then give it back.

    SERVICE FRIENDS: Borrow your stuff for a few days then give it back with some nasty stains.



    CIVILIAN FRIENDS: Know a few things about you.

    SERVICE FRIENDS: Will blackmail you.


    CIVILIAN FRIENDS: Will leave you behind if that is what the crowd is doing.

    SERVICE FRIENDS: Will leave you behind if that is what the crowd is doing unless you're a bit flush that day.


    CIVILIAN FRIENDS: Would knock on your door.

    SERVICE FRIENDS: Would kick it down.



    CIVILIAN FRIENDS: Share a few experiences.

    SERVICE FRIENDS: Share a few anti-social diseases.


    CIVILIAN FRIENDS: Will take your drink away when they think you've had enough.

    SERVICE FRIENDS: Will laugh like fcuk as you got your stomach pumped.


    CIVILIAN FRIENDS: Will talk crap to the person who talks crap about you.

    SERVICE FRIENDS: Will decide over a beer.


    CIVILIAN FRIENDS: Are for a while.

    SERVICE FRIENDS: Are for life unless you know they're coming then you can pretend to be out.
     
  5. CIVILIAN FRIENDS: Will take your drink away when they think you've had enough.

    SERVICE FRIENDS: Will look at you stumbling all over the place and say, 'You had better drink the rest of that, you know we never waste it. Then they carry you home and shave your eyebrows, black marker you and take photos.
     
  6. CIVILIAN FRIENDS - Die and the funeral is a sombre affair with all being reverent.

    SERVICE FRIENDS - Die and its an excuse for a re-union p1ss up and to remember all the f**k ups and things the deceased shouldnt have said.