Christmas Parties

 Has anyone got a works/Sqn/Regt Christmas Party tale to tell?  Last year my team went to a very posh hotel.   I got into trouble for throwing my food at the other tables.  The management demanded I cleaned the mess !!  And I thought food fighting wasn't just a squaddie thing.  

This year, the fat controller is taking us to the local at 2pm.  He's putting his corporate card behind the bar until 7pm.  There is eight of us in total.  So, in five hours I'm gonna go for approx three pints an hour drinking (lager), along with the cheap champagne he buys, and any wine.  
             The others are also plotting to kick the a r s e out of the bosses card.  

Anyone else any amusing/witty stories?  


War Hero
Our Christmas party was really amusing this year.....Went to a posh hotel in Plymouth, remember gettin really sloshed with mates only to start doing and saying naughty things to the staff :-[(Won't get into it...Emarrasing!) After that went clubbin' in Plymouth...Only to return home at 7am WITH RIPPED TIGHTS and a mouth like Maggie Thatcher's minge!! Don't ask why.....Long story!
Had a bust up with hubby but soon had him licking my feet.... :p :p ;)


War Hero
Did'nt say that did I..... ::) :-X

Naaa...I love him too much :-/ ;), if he does'nt get me wot I want this year for Christmas, then I may just consider playing rounders elewhere! ;D
We had our christmas party around the hospital bed of a friend of ours who has been in a coma for three years.  We had been told that familiar sounds can help the patient to regain consciousness.  Total load of sh#te!  He's still there.


I remember an all ranks christmas function in the hangar at Detmold, where I had slightly alot to drink.
Left the hangar to get on the transport home with Mr Helmanx and some friends, then I got off the transport and preceeded to puke all over some bushes.

On the monday morning the CO had the whole regiment on parade demanding to know who had been ill over his little garden patch in front of the hangar.

One very red faced Mr Helmanx didnt say a thing, neither did anyone else. They all gave me an ear bashing instead ;D ;D ;D ;D
Same thing happened to me at 657 in Dec '92.  Christmas drinks in the crew room, followed by me going outside to pee against the hanger.  Along comes SSM Mr Perv**, who spotted me and screamed 'come ere!'.  I let go of the 'small thing' and ran around the back of the hanger, still weeing.  I couldn't go back in the crewroom in case he was there.  Wet jeans and embarrassed me.    


War Hero
erm ........leeanne

are you a guz rating

Plymouth is a mighty good crack, I even miss it.

Yeah.....The nightlife is brill, have to agree with you on that one! But don't understand wot a guz rating is... ???

Leeanne x
Remember this Christmas:







                          ENDING IN TEAR'S  
 (or something like that)


War Hero
Oh....Cheers mate for that.. ;)

No....Would'nt be on ere' mouthing off if I was. ;D
It is full of Matlow's down this way though....Yum yum ;D


At our christmas party last year, someone declared naked bar. So, we all stripped off and one guy had a turd sat in his pants.

He hasn't lived it down to this day!
MMmmmmm, Sniper Birdy, you need to devulge more.  A nakid bar?  Did EVERYONE go nakid?  How many people?  Was there any sexual high jinks?  Can I come to your party this year?

Leeanne, the car is also like mine, except it's light blue.


War Hero
Naaa....I was only winding you up, I have a nice car (well I like it)....But not as fast and nice as that! ;)
The Japs don't make nice cars ;D ;D

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