Christmas haul 2018: Best, worst, and most pointless presents - who got what?

Best thing so far - Mrs A_G got me a wooden key ring. But has engraved her 5 top moments about us on it. Really thoughtful! Not like me. I really like it.

Strangest thing - my dear old ma got me a go-pro action stick to place the go-pro on. A selfie stick for go-pros.
Would probably be quite good if I had a go-pro to go on it?!!
 
This is for masturbation. Just to clarify. I read my post and it smelled faintly of arrse banditry. Which is not my style. Unless she's a sheep.
 

Arte_et_Marte

ADC
Moderator
I haven't got a scoobie what's under the tree.

I have been been laid up in bed in a darkened room with flu for 24 hours.

I'll have a look tomorrow.
 
I got a bottle of 'Real Feel' Durex lube. A gift to myself from myself, as it was reduced to £1.80 from £5 and sometimes spit just doesn't cut the mustard.

Having now used it (Since the first paragraph was typed FYI), I am not sure what 'real' it's meant to equate to. A Welsh coalminers arse? A Clydesdale horse?

Hm.

ETA: This is for masturbation. Just to clarify. I read my post and it smelled faintly of arrse banditry. Which is not my style. Unless she's asleep.
Are you admitting you are a wanker? just asking as any man that says no is a liar…..

Two different bottle sets.. a tin of body scrub stuff and as yet unopened present from the nephew who visits tomorrow.
You may think thats a tad meagre, i did get to choose a new watch from pulsar
 

Issi

War Hero
I got three Irvine Welsh books, I hated trainspotting

I also got the 11th book in a series of which I've read none of the others and the 16th book in another series, again of which I've read none of the others. My Mum apparently asked a man in the shop what was a 'good book' for a man.
Chocolate and sweets, I've got the least sweet tooth of anyone I know.

I was driving, so had one glass of wine all day, and got home at 10 and remembered that I forgot to get hooch for me, and walked down to the 24hr garage to get a 4 pack of lager, and bloody dropped them on the way home, puncturing two of the cans and covering me in a thin spray of lager.

I'm looking forward to tomorrow to be honest.
 
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I got three Irvine Welsh books, I hated

I also got the 11th book in a series of which I've read none of the others and the 16th book in another series, again of which I've read none of the others. My Mum apparently asked a man in the shop what was a 'good book' for a man.
Chocolate and sweets, I've got the least sweet tooth of anyone I know.

I was driving, so had one glass of wine all day, and so got home at 10 and remembered that I forgot to get hooch for me, and so popped down the 24hr garage to get a 4 pack of lager, and ******* dropped them on the way home, puncturing two of the cans and covering me in a thin spray of lager.

I'm looking forward to tomorrow to be honest.
You best get on amazon then
 

StBob072

LE
Book Reviewer
I got three Irvine Welsh books, I hated

I also got the 11th book in a series of which I've read none of the others and the 16th book in another series, again of which I've read none of the others. My Mum apparently asked a man in the shop what was a 'good book' for a man.
Chocolate and sweets, I've got the least sweet tooth of anyone I know.

I was driving, so had one glass of wine all day, and so got home at 10 and remembered that I forgot to get hooch for me, and so popped down the 24hr garage to get a 4 pack of lager, and ******* dropped them on the way home, puncturing two of the cans and covering me in a thin spray of lager.

I'm looking forward to tomorrow to be honest.

That's cheered me up no end! :D
 
I'd found JustinGuitar and have got his website bookmarked. JustinGuitar Site Map And Guitar Lesson Structure

Seems to give the basics which is just what I need.

Also found a couple of vids by Tommy Emmanuel and also Paul Davids which are informative for someone like me who is just starting out.

Learn the basic chords and then start doing, doe rae me scales up and down the neck.

It will get your fingers moving and muscle memory will kick in.
It takes a while, but then start doing them backwards and forwards.

Hope this helps, it takes years before you get really good.

Even then you will never be good enough.

Hope that makes sense, happy Christmas.
 
Ehmm, an interesting one from my brother.
A build your own twin lens reflex old style film camera with a Haynes manual, that has step by step instructions.
This will be a doddle I thought, but f*ck me it was to say the least, interesting and involving.
The screws were tiny and I had to dig out my head torch and super strength glasses and tweezers.
It also involved several tiny springs and I knew if one went ping and flew across the room the whole lot would have to go in the bin, as I would never find it.
It took me about an hour to tune the shutter, and about three hours in total to build.
But all is good.
I will put a roll of 35mm film through it, just for shits and giggles, but can see no reason that in reasonable light it will not produce a very good image.
Recommend one if you have a few hours/days to kill.
I have no idea what plastic the majority of components are made of, but my guess is Kryptonite, as I was applying serious amounts of torque to self tapping screws that were no more than 1 mm wide and barely 2.5 mm long.

My bro bought it as a joke, along with a very nice bottle of cognac, as he thought it would be a laugh to watch me try, and fail to build it when pissed.

I won.
35mm?
 

StBob072

LE
Book Reviewer

Yep. Thanks Auntie .. you shouldn't have!

TBH the comedy value when I said to the old man, let's see what P** has given us, was priceless.

Every year she gives me a precise list of what she would like (also for her birthday which falls a week before Christmas Day) - this entails me getting four presents as I have to get one on behalf of my mother as well.

Thus, she gets four things she actually wants, whilst I routinely get something which is good for target practice, at best.
 
I have several hundred feet of Ilfords finest stashed away.
That set me off on a search for chemicals, papers and other sundries with a dream of getting my darkroom up again. No chance; one expensive hobby is enough.
 
For reasons I can't be arsed to go into, I got fuckall this year.

Help me to enjoy the experience of festive acquisition, by proxy, by regailing me with your tales of Yuletide goodies. Also, I'm nosy. :santa:

Bottle of Talisker.

Bottle of good port.

Honing stone.

Hint to self: do not use presents in order given.
 
I got three Irvine Welsh books, I hated trainspotting

I also got the 11th book in a series of which I've read none of the others and the 16th book in another series, again of which I've read none of the others. My Mum apparently asked a man in the shop what was a 'good book' for a man.
Chocolate and sweets, I've got the least sweet tooth of anyone I know.

I was driving, so had one glass of wine all day, and got home at 10 and remembered that I forgot to get hooch for me, and walked down to the 24hr garage to get a 4 pack of lager, and bloody dropped them on the way home, puncturing two of the cans and covering me in a thin spray of lager.

I'm looking forward to tomorrow to be honest.

(((Issi))))
 
I got three Irvine Welsh books, I hated trainspotting

I also got the 11th book in a series of which I've read none of the others and the 16th book in another series, again of which I've read none of the others. My Mum apparently asked a man in the shop what was a 'good book' for a man.
Chocolate and sweets, I've got the least sweet tooth of anyone I know.

I was driving, so had one glass of wine all day, and got home at 10 and remembered that I forgot to get hooch for me, and walked down to the 24hr garage to get a 4 pack of lager, and bloody dropped them on the way home, puncturing two of the cans and covering me in a thin spray of lager.

I'm looking forward to tomorrow to be honest.
If it was 'The Reverse of the Medal', buy yourself the first in the canon; 'Master and Commander'. You won't regret it.
 

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