Christmas gifts for platonic "laydee" friends.

What is an acceptable gift for a platonic female friend? I need some help please ladies.

The background is this:-

When we were married, her friends were our friends, and probably because I treated Mrs Fez so well, her friends always bought me really nice gifts for Christmas and birthdays.
When the relationship ended, I assumed that the gift-giving would also dry up, so imagine my surprise and embarrassment last year when I received a bumper crop of Christmas pressies from her friends.
This year, I am determined to make amends, but I'm struggling for ideas.
So, if it was you, what would you like?
They are all stylish, professional women in their thirties, some married, some single , all childless.
Input from my married/shacked-up brethren is also welcome ie: What would you find acceptable as a gift for your wife/girlfriend from another man? (I'm guessing, no crutchless lederhosen :wink: )


What would you find acceptable as a gift for your wife/girlfriend from another man? - Fcuk all. Something for both of us or the house. Otherwise he wants to play hide the sausage. Or am I too suspicious?
Go onto and into the ladies section. You can get monkey nail dryers and sh1te.
Fez as a bad man with a relatively good pedigree my advice is quite simple DO NOT ENTER THIS AREA!!! If they want to buy you prezzies either singularly or as a couple fine, but even if you decide to return the compliment bear the following in mind... No matter how platonic the friendship, if there is a man involved he will definately see it as stepping over a boundary, even if he says not (especially as bloke always buy shit prezzies for their long term partner anyway) the other scenario is what if the lady conerned dedides at some point she wants more of your good kind-heartedness!!! how soon a PRESENT = EVIDENCE !!!!
Disregard this at your peril, especially as, and I quote... "They are all stylish, professional women in their thirties, some married, some single , all childless." , is it just me or does that read as, yeah maybe a bit out of reach but if it was on a plate I would be in there like swimwear!!!!
Regarding gifts for married/partnered chicks:

The old rule of thumb is that no "laydee" accepts gifts of clothing or jewelry from a man that isn't her significant other. This also extends to beauty treatments and products, presumably because it's too personal and has to do with body contact.

It's a pretty old-school rule, but I think it probably resonates with most of the married/partnered men on this board. A pair of earrings or pedicure gift certificate would probably result in an interrogation for the missus, or a punch in the mouth for the unlucky Fez.

A hardbound book (coffee table or special interest), a gift certificate for a bookstore in a non-cheap amount or a nice business card holder is a good gift for this I was one myself in my previous life I can attest to it. That says "I respect your wife's intellectual capabilities and professional acumen." It implies that you don't even realize she has t!ts.

Failing that, a bottle of expensive booze they can both share. Don't forget a card that explains your intentions ("Dear Jane, from your old friend SF," Jane and John if you know them both.)

The etiquette maven from hell,

Oh boy..... Its a minefield.
Choose a present with care and they will contrast it with the last minute, thoughtless, wrong sized and tasteless bit of tat from the man in their lives. You will seem sooo much more caring, sensitive, understanding........
Choose the wrong present and they will aahhhh over you as you are obviously trying hard but sooooo need a woman in your life to do these sort of things for you.....
Don't send a present and you run the risk of concerned 'phone calls to make sure that you're okay, or concern that you are still emotionally scarred and so unable to reciprocate (and are thus even more sensitive in a Mr Darcy, open to the waist shirt sort of way).
And above all, of course, there will be the potential threat of physical dismemberment from the other men in these laydeees' lives.
Heh, heh, heh, if you're still around post-Christmas, do let us all know how it went!!
Best of luck,
Did the presents you got last year say they came from her only if she has a partner or from both of them? If only the one name on the card - beware as TankyYank says so wisely and well. Anything you get must be assexual and addressed to both of them.
I'll throw this in as well - I doubt there is such a thing as a platonic relationship anyway. I think the cheimistry always works - later if not sooner.
Rickshaw, thankyou for your good sense, I cant believe Fez asked the question in the first place lol, its like someone sayin "Hey RM theres a field, I have planted 200 mines, 50 are live, fancy a wager?" hence my "don't go there" approach.
An phial of your sperm with a passport-sized photo of you giving two thumbs up stuck to it would do the trick. It would identify which ones are worth keeping as mates and which ones are prissy busybodies after some emotional schadenfreude now that desperate housewives has finished its run.
:lol: Thanks for the feedback so far folks, I realised it was a minefield, which is why I sought out the sagacity of my fellow Arrsers. RTFQs DNA idea is tempting (and cheap) but would perhaps be pushing my luck a little too far.
Tankie definitely has the measure of the situation, and ORCs comments are very valid.
The gifts I've received in the past have always been from the ladies themselves, with no mention of their respective husbands, although one did sign on behalf of her two cats :roll:
Unfortunately, the option of "getting in there" is, frankly, untenable. I still live with my ex, as its a large house with room for us both to do our own thing, and as she suffers with MS, I am her, sometime carer.
Her friends are round all the time, but can you imagine the fallout if I decided to take our friendship to the next level?
A colleague has just suggested balloon flights for two (one not being me) as a suitable solution. I quite like the idea, its not cheap, but it does seem fairly innocuous.
Your last post has almost moved me to posting a sensible reply - now that you have placed your dilemma in context and, before I revert to type,, you have my sympathy and compassion. However.....above all else, do not, I say again, DO NOT give any sort of present to a woman who sends you a gift from her and her cats!
thegimp said:
A petrol driven "rabbit" and some XL **** beads
Screw etiquette...this is what you should give to the woman who signs gifts from her and her cats. 8O I'm sure she's lovely, but:

"Dear Jane...Get a man, FFS. Merry Christmas, TankiesYank."
Universal currency- alcohol. Champagne always seems to go down well and the blokes they're married to would never shun the prospect of free p1ss.
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