Christmas Dinner

Discussion in 'The ARRSE Hole' started by Oracle, Dec 21, 2003.

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  1. A minor item on the news this morning was along the lines of, "Who would you like most to sit down with for your Christmas Dinner". The top man out was Johnny Wilkinson, but I reckon he'd be a bit boring - and I think that his selection was a touch too topical methinks. Me, I'd plump for:

    Winston Churchill - a soldier, a leader, an all-round bl00dy hero, the conversation would be top.

    Jean-Paul Sartre - presumptious French existential philosopher - just so I could give him a good shoeing when I'd finished off the brandy (probably assisted by Winston).

    Holly Valance - so I could finish the day off with a damn good sh*g!. :D

    So come on then, who would you sit down to Christmas dinner with? No lists of names - give the reason why.
  2. Beyonce, would look good with my Giblets hanging out of her back doors. She could also wash up afterwards

    Johnny Wilkinson may be a good bet, afterall he didn't become an England player and miss out on all the bar room antics.

    Jake can come to my house on Christmas day, I could cut him into small pieces, moce the tumble dryer into the dining room and watch him spinning as we ate.

    Finally Guest of honour and all round entertainer, Tommy Cooper or Spike Milligan... but they might hum a bit
  3. Michael Portaloo - MP with a human side. Think I could have a laugh with him, so long as he kept his hands to himself.

    Herr Hitler - Chat to him about his mind at the time. What was really going on in that head of his.

    My two mates in NI, Nick and Bert - We could laugh at anything, had intelligent conversations and drink barrels of lager.

    Alec Guiness or Peter Sellers - Why not ? LOL !
  4. Tony Blair and all the chaps and chappesses who have to change over and miss christmas with there families because of bad planning..........should be some interesting comments :lol:
  5. I was going to say that wannker Bliar too. Our Christmases always end up with a fight, and it'd be a pleasant change to chin that cnut instead of some of my fcking horrible relatives, and if there's one female I want to fcking slap it's that fcking smiling cnut he calls a wife :D
  6. Kylie Minogue, Marlene Dietrich, Ingrid Bergman, Ava Gardner and Pans People, and for pudding?
  7. I just want that guy in Shotgun's picture, so I could peel that latex off him and have him for pudding, covered in brandy and cream............
  8. Mushroom, we both obviously have pudding on our minds!!
  9. If you were a bloke he'd like it too. He's AAC. :D
  10. Geoff Hoon: To thank him for fukcing up my families xmas.

    George W Bush: To tell him what a cnut he really is.

    Jordan: Just to see if she really takes it up the arrse

    and then that German Cannibal Bloke: To eat the 3 sad bastards mentioned above !!!
  11. Shotgun, I'll convert him!!! 8O :lol: