Chilean miners freed

Discussion in 'The NAAFI Bar' started by left_handed_sailor, Oct 13, 2010.

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  1. In order to make light of the new incessant media frenzy that is the lifting of some unfortunate people from a hole in the ground, what would you do first if you were being pulled out now? Would you confess to finding Pedro's rear end strangely alluring during these cramped conditions, would you confess to nicking the last biscuit and replacing it with some rock, or would you use this limelight opportunity to release a duet with Jordan, entitled "stuck in your hole with 32 other blokes", a project you've been meaning to do with her some time?
     
  2. Phone Max Clifford and do a deal.
     
  3. I would horrify Chile's Catholics (70% of the population) by saying only that I'd discovered the purest form of the Eucharist and that I now understand the survivors of Flight 571 perfectly. I'd leave the rest to their imagination.
     
  4. Expect a TV Movie soon eh? Staring Ross Kemp as a man persecuted down a hole, Barbara Windsor as the woman he loved, Russ Abbot as the American hole digger pulled out of retirement in order to dig one last hole for his Jonny stuck in a hospital and Alan Rickman as the Sheriff of Nottinghole, intent on flooding the mine and killing everybody in order to collect the insurance money. Steamy...
     
  5. Expect a long wait after miner 30 then?
     
  6. I'd have invented a 34th miner called Jolio (pr. 'Holey-o').

    With the cooperation of the others, it could keep the rescue fun going for years.
     
  7. Let me know when they get 27 out I'm doing 28s wife.
     
  8. He's the one who got eaten.
     
  9. He could be the Glasgow miner Wan Sanshoe
     
  10. In all seriousness I would get an agent asap, you'd be minted with all the bollocks stories you could make up.
     
  11. Howabout a new version of Big Brother - one where contestants are all put into a mine and it's filled in. One might argue that there's where the program ends, but to prolong the agony they can complete tasks such as taking a dump into an already filled pooh bag, trying to drink the water not loaded with arsenic, or fighting off the evil cave monsters (prove there aren't before you respond).
     
  12. Fixed that for you. Channel 4 will buy the rights, nay bother.
     
  13. No, no. Not subtle enough. No overt statements about the Eucharist etc needed.
    Just a 34th bedspace.

    And maybe a diary.
     
  14. I think they should do a little magic trick, Just before the tube is due to go up the shaft, someone walks in front of the camera, Pedro jumps out and they all express surprise when Pheonix arrives at the surface empty.

    One of the guys (No 3 I think) may have been reading this and bought a bag up with him, after he'd got out of pheonix and embraced a few people he started rummaging in his bag, he'd only bought some rock for his rescuers, I bet he'd spent 67 days carving Greetings from San Jose through the middle of it.
     
  15. Did he tell you he would let you go up the chimney shaped escape hole first?