Child Support Agency forms

#1
The following are all replies that British women have put on Child Support
Agency forms in the section for listing father's details. These are genuine

excerpts from the forms.

1. Regarding the identity of the father of my twins, child A was fathered
by Jim Munson. I am unsure as to the identity of the father of child B, but

I believe that he was conceived on the same night.

2. I am unsure as to the identity of the father of my child as I was being
sick out of a window when taken unexpectedly from behind. I can provide you

with a list of names of men that I think were at the party if this helps.

3. I do not know the name of the father of my little girl. She was
conceived at a party at 36, Grand Avenuewhere I had unprotected sex with a
man I met that night. I do remember that the sex was so good that I
fainted. If you do manage to track down the father, can you send me his
phone number? Thanks.


4. I don't know the identity of the father of my daughter. He drives a BMW
that now has a hole made by my stiletto in one of the door panels. Perhaps
you can contact BMW service stations in this area and see if he's had it
replaced.

5. I have never had sex with a man. I am awaiting a letter from the Pope
confirming that my son's conception was immaculate and that he is Christ
rose again. .

6. I cannot tell you the name of child A's dad as he informs me that to do
so would blow his cover and that would have cataclysmic implications for
the British economy. I am torn between doing right by you and right by the
country. Please advice.

7. I do not know who the father of my child was as all squaddies look the
same to me. I can confirm that he was a Royal Green Jacket.

8. Peter Jones is the father of child A. If you do catch up with him, can
you ask him what he did with my AC/DC CDs?

9. From the dates it seems that my daughter was conceived at Euro Disney;
maybe it really is the MagicKingdom.

10. So much about that night is a blur. The only thing that I remember for
sure is Delia Smith did a program about eggs earlier in the evening. If I'd

have stayed in and watched more TV rather than going to the party at 146,
Miller Drive, mine might have remained unfertilized.

11. I am unsure as to the identity of the father of my baby, after all when

you eat a can of beans you can't be sure which one made you fart
 

Grownup_Rafbrat

LE
Book Reviewer
#2
That's been around for at least ten years.

Still funny though.
 
#3
Absolutely brilliant.

As I type, I am rolling about on the floor laughing my arrse off, having recently spat yet another full mouthful of coffee on my monitor.

If only I could find the relevant smiley face to really illustrate my feelings.
 
#7
A CROSS SECTION OF 1000 PEOPLE IN THE UK, MADE UP OF AFGHANS, PAKISTANIS, INDIANS, POLES, IRAQIS, SOMALIS, ALBANIANS, BOSNIANS, TURKS, GEORDIES, BRUMMIES, ABERDONIANS AND LIVERPUDLIANS WERE ASKED IF THEY THOUGHT BRITAIN SHOULD CHANGE ITS CURRENCY TO THE EURO.

99% SAID THEY WERE HAPPY WITH THE GIRO.
 
#9
My ex used to work for the CSA and shown me a response once that said something llike "i dont know who the father of my child is as he was wearing a motorbike crash helmet at the time!"
 

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