Chilcot Poetry Corner

Discussion in 'Poetry Corner' started by fertman, Jan 28, 2010.

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  1. They say justice is poetic. On that basis I thought a little song might be in order to cheer up tomorrow's hearing. I've conjured up the first verse, but I leave it up to you worthy lads to continue it... So, to the tune of Rudolph the Rednosed Reindeer....

    The Ballad of Tony B. Liar

    Tony the Lying B@stard

    Has a very lengthy nose

    And when he tells you something

    You can even watch it grow

    Right, in your own time!!!!!!
    • Like Like x 1
  2. When Tony went out to the Gulf
    And said 'On behalf of the country I thank ya'
    From General to Trooper they thought
    Fcuk off back to London you w@nker! :twisted:
  3. To a Noose

    Wee, sleekit, cowrin, Tony-ous beastie,
    O, what a panic's in thy breastie!
    Thou threw away our nation’s honour
    As if ‘twere worthless!
    And laid us down with US mongers,
    Thou utter penis!

    I'm truly sorry Parliament
    Has broken all forbears intent,
    An' swallowed flimsy case for war
    Like alcoholics
    Each lie and each exaggeration
    Although ‘twas bollocks!

    I doubt na, thou will be afraid;
    The lies ye spun will take their toll
    But never grieve the cost ye paid
    Wi blind obedience;
    And lives o’ many a better soul,
    Whaur is yer conscience?!

    Thy wee-bit housie, in Winslow Hall
    It's silly money you’ve been earnin’!
    For tellin’ glaikit septic gatherin’s,
    Their heart’s desire!
    An' ne’er a thought to squaddies burnin’,
    In Iraq’s quagmire!

    Still thou are damned, if up to me!
    The past-times soon will toucheth thee:
    And och! I backward cast my e'e,
    On drear performance
    An' forward, tho' I canna see,
    I pledge remembrance!
    • Like Like x 1
    (with apologies to Philip Larkin, the miserable git!)

    They fcuk you up
    Your predecessors as prime minister
    They leave you all the lies they told
    To be enquired into

    But they were fucked up in their turn
    By lack of good integrity
    To rapt on staying there in power
    To tell the truth to you and me

    Tone hands on misery to Gord
    It deepens like a coastal shelf
    For fcuks sake tell the ******* truth
    And don't tell any lies yourself...
  5. With only slight amendment:

    I could not dig, I dared not rob,
    Therefore I lied to please the Yanks.
    Now all my lies are proved untrue,
    But I'll still draw upon their thanks.
    My lies were true as true, I cry
    For I'm a pretty straight kinda guy
  6. It is nearly here
    The time when we read the truth and
    See that **** Bliar hung

    (i'm shit at poems. it's supposed to be a haiku)
  7. Iraq inquiry delay very serious, says senior Tory
  8. I read that blair had turned down the Garter. I can't believe that Herself offered it to him.

    That's not a poem either. Must Try Harder.
  9. (ahem) My attempt at haiku:

    WMD, Blair proclaims -
    Loudly, proudly, wrongly.
    America's poodle shamed.
  10. Rabbi eat yer fekkin' heart oot .
    Slainge ....and have a like.
  11. Oy vey!
  12. Roses are red
    Violets are blue
    Poetry is hard
    B'Liar is a cun.t
    • Like Like x 1