Cheryl: ‘I want more children - but you don't need a man to have a baby’

#21
There was a time when I would’ve crawled a mile over broken glass just to hear her fart through a crackly walkie talkie.

Now she’d have to ask very nicely.
Fussy bugger. She would only have to ask me a tiny bit nicely. “Please” would be nice to have, but not obligatory.
 

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#22
Fussy bugger. She would only have to ask me a tiny bit nicely. “Please” would be nice to have, but not obligatory.
I know a Geordie lad who went to school with her.

By all accounts her and her family were well known as a bunch of complete and utter pikeys who’d stab you for a packet of rizlas. She was an acne ridden wretch who worked in maccy dees.

If my memory serves I think some of her siblings ended up in prison.

Delightful.
 
#23
I know a Geordie lad who went to school with her.

By all accounts her and her family were well known as a bunch of complete and utter pikeys who’d stab you for a packet of rizlas. She was an acne ridden wretch who worked in maccy dees.

If my memory serves I think some of her siblings ended up in prison.

Delightful.
I’m from Paisley. You just described my teenage girlfriends.
 
#24
I'd give her a night of unbridled deviency to give her a child.

Not that I find her anything but bland yet repellent, but after that experience she'll fade into obscurity and spend her time sat in the corner, in a foetal position swatting at flies that aren't there and sobbing.

Esspecially when she later discovers I've had the snip and it was all for nought.
 
#25
Cheryl: ‘I want more children - but you don't need a man to have a baby’

View attachment 387927

Cheryl is crying. She is sitting in the middle of a London restaurant pushing a napkin into the corners of her eyes in an attempt to stop the tears falling.

The singer (who now goes by her first name only, following her second divorce), has been telling me how completely she has changed since giving birth to her son, Bear, who is now two. We’ve been talking about everything from her relationship with Bear’s dad, One Direction singer Liam Payne, to her weekly therapy sessions.

Any takers?
Cheryl: ‘I want more children - but you don't need a man to have a baby’

Well, as male, adult, slebritees, and toy boys aren't working for you either, best try, https:/www.oktesttube.com, but be warned that there will be male semen involved in the process, so perhaps you should have paid more attention during biology lessons at school.
 
#26
Surely she’s aware that a man needs to be involved at some stage. Presumably, despite her son’s name, he wasn’t actually fathered by another species?
The mind boggles.
Gylls is crapping himself.
 
#27
#30
Didn't sgt Harper in Sharpe say something along the the lines of 'there's no shame in being born in the gutter but it's a hell of a thing to want to stay there'.

She may well be able to have children in her own, maybe even start buying them in from around the world, but it's not a good example for her fans not a great situation for her.

she's obviously either picking d*ckheads or she's a bunny boiler.
 
#36
I know a Geordie lad who went to school with her.

By all accounts her and her family were well known as a bunch of complete and utter pikeys who’d stab you for a packet of rizlas. She was an acne ridden wretch who worked in maccy dees.

If my memory serves I think some of her siblings ended up in prison.

Delightful.
Unfortunately I know her uncle.

He is without doubt the laziest, weakest and most untruthful bellend I've ever had the misfortune to meet.

I'd gladly turn down a go on Cheryl's fragrant ringpiece to hammer nails into her uncle's femurs.

The Geordie chav prick.
 
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