Cheers Hitler!

#1
Just watched old Fatty Moyles on 'Who do you think you are' Finding out his Great Grandad was a Mick killed fighting for the Brits in WW1. Got chatting with the Missus about the World Wars and weird shite.

Turns out my Nan was married to a chap called Fred at the start of WW2 - he was killed in action in North Africa fighting Rommel and the Afrika Korps. His best pal, a fella called Jim survived the War, came home home, spent a lot of time with his oppos Widow and eventually married her. They then had little boy - My Dad.

So in a bizarre way, I owe my life to the German Army. Any other Arrsers got strange tales of the World Wars???
 
#2
Yes indeed. My grand mother was a dirty slag who sold her minge to the US soldiers for chocolate and nylons. Hey presto..my Dad is born.

The dirty minx!!
 
T

trowel

Guest
#3
Just found out that Hitler was having it of with my great gran when he lived in Liverpool while visiting his sister there In about 1908. Isn't life strange?
 
#4
My Grandad was a soldier already when WWII kicked off and spent virtually six years away in France, the desert and then the middle east. When he came home he started banging out kids with my Gran like it was going out of fashion, six years of miostly wanking will do that I guess. One of those kids was my mum.

So in recognition of the fact that I probably wouldnt be here if my Grandad hadnt been away for all that time building up a fecking huge libido that resulted in a family of seven, and my mum ... Cheers Hitler !!
 
T

trowel

Guest
#6
My Uncle was in the desert with Monty, WW2. Came back after the war speaking excellent German. Danke, err, I mean thanks Hitler.
 
#7
I never knew my dad, he was in the war from the start. He nicked a plane in 1941 but crashed landed in England somewhere. (I think it was Scotland actually but me ma' never wanted to admit that she married a ginger haired fukwit from O'er Adrens wall). All she has told me is that I come from Officer Material and NOT the afore mentioned ginger haired fukwit. She claimed this ossifer threw one up her clack before being carted off by the bizzies.

She did leave me a picture of pa' before leaving the house in a hearse which I thought was top notch of her but I was surprised when she made me sing "Deutschland Uber Alles " before passing wind,
sorry, I mean passed away.

If anybody recognizes him please let me know. I'd love to find out the adventures he must have had in the post war years.


 
#8
My Grandad was interned in Tunisa until 1947 after ditching in the Med early on. As a result, my Dad grew up not really knowing his father and didn't know how to deal with kids of his own when I came along.
I had a crap childhood with little parental involvement except to belittle me and was forced to wear shorts until I was 23. Thanks Adi.
 
#9
Spank-it said:
I never knew my dad, he was in the war from the start. He nicked a plane in 1941 but crashed landed in England somewhere. (I think it was Scotland actually but me ma' never wanted to admit that she married a ginger haired fukwit from O'er Adrens wall). All she has told me is that I come from Officer Material and NOT the afore mentioned ginger haired fukwit. She claimed this ossifer threw one up her clack before being carted off by the bizzies.

She did leave me a picture of pa' before leaving the house in a hearse which I thought was top notch of her but I was surprised when she made me sing "Deutschland Uber Alles " before passing wind,
sorry, I mean passed away.

If anybody recognizes him please let me know. I'd love to find out the adventures he must have had in the post war years.


Uncle Rudolf. You long lost cun.................................t

Last I heard he joined a Swingers Club in Spandau 8O
 

the_boy_syrup

LE
Book Reviewer
#10
My grandad was at Dunkirk and then most of the major battles throughout WW2
He finished up a Captain at Nuremburg 1945

20 years hard fukcing labour for just doing his duty - bast4rds (in his defence he said it was freezing in France during July '44 and he torched that village to provide fire for cooking etc)

His brother died in Aushwitz ffs*


He never even got that Beetle he ordered in '42 lost paperwork my arrse

Cheers Hitler you mad fool

* He fell out of a watchtower pissed






Hat,coat ahh taxi

My sig will give it away anyhoo
 
#11
My Dad came back from the Middle East in Spring 1942 back to India..... and me Brother was the result in early '43. Me Dad came back on leave in 1944 to India.... and I was the result in Spring '45...... My Dad was back home on on final leave in again early '46 in India... and me Sister came along in late '46....

Thanks....... Mein Fhurer....as he was knobfing Frau Braun in der Bunker mit der grossen stinken pimel in Der seiten shoe-ing mit enen grosse foote!!! :p :?

Nichs verstehen, das is richtig, Nien????????
 
#12
Cheers Hitler,

Fur die order of sheisse lots of mein steel fur panzers in 1936. Mein account in Switzerland is looking sehr gut. Shame you shooting yourzelf in die kopf in der Fuhrerbunker as i hat ein watch to say danke.

Von Krupp.
 
#13
Grandfather lost a leg during WW2. (Not quite in some act of bravery on the front line, but dossing around tanks in Oxford and got his leg caught in between a track and sprocket, silly bugger). He ended up commanding desks rather than tanks so never saw action after that. Probably saved him as his unit (don't actually know which one) didn't fare too well on D-Day.

I was told that he never really felt that he earned his Major due to this, but oh well, I'd surely not be here otherwise!
 
#14
Not a world war but my Uncle was the first soldier shot in Korea, he was a liney in the Sigs and was up a pole at the time. This may or may not be true, as he was p1ss3d when he told me, but he was shot in the thigh in Korea. Hence i joined as a Rad op.
 
#15
spent_case said:
Just watched old Fatty Moyles on 'Who do you think you are' Finding out his Great Grandad was a Mick killed fighting for the Brits in WW1. Got chatting with the Missus about the World Wars and weird shite.

Turns out my Nan was married to a chap called Fred at the start of WW2 - he was killed in action in North Africa fighting Rommel and the Afrika Korps. His best pal, a fella called Jim survived the War, came home home, spent a lot of time with his oppos Widow and eventually married her. They then had little boy - My Dad.

So in a bizarre way, I owe my life to the German Army. Any other Arrsers got strange tales of the World Wars???
Me too, but in the previous War. My Grandmother married a chap who joined the Glosters in WW1. He bought the big one, and his best mate came home and married my Granny. We visited his grave in Abbeville a few years back -- it was oddly moving. If he hadn't died, my son and I wouldn't have lived. It felt like he was one of the family.

I suppose I owe my life then to Archduke Ferdinand? Or should it be, the guy who shot him?!!
 
#16
Long story, possibly not that interesting.

My Grandad was not allowed to join up in WWII as he was a riveter in Caridff Docks (it was felt he was worth more to the war effort in repairing ships, than running around Europe playing war). Across the road from where he lived they turned the park (The Marl) into a US Army supply depot, & he used to take bets of the septics for the local booky. He ended up dying of pneumonia(SP?) in around 1944, & the septics turned up at my grans house with loads & loads of tinned fruit & food stuffs that my mum had never seen before, when they found out.

My Grandads brother (Royal Signals) however, was part of the BEF that went camping in France in 1939, but he rushed home via Dunkirk when he realised he'd left the stove on in 1940. He then went to serve in Africa & Italy, came home & married his sister-in-law (my gran). The brother was a total cnut to my mum, whereas my real grandad was lovely apparently.

So cheers Addie, all those chances to shoot my step-Grandfather & you failed. Yet my real Grandad dies of an extremely bad cold.
Bugger! :x
 
#17
18th May 1943 my house was bombed killing my Dads wife and 2 daughters, a year latter he married my Mum and so I too owe one to mister Hitler
 
#18
As the late but very funny Bernard Manning once said

A relative of mine died in a Nazi concentration Camp during the War you know. Very sad









He got pissed one night and fell out of the fucking watchtower
 
#19
My Grandad was all over the shop during WW2. Dunkirque, Africa, Middle East. I actually thought he was a bit of a Walt until he got his photo album out. Some great picures of him in Bagdad sat (sat!!) on a camel. He reckoned he never had to fire his gun but I ain't too sure about that, you know what the old folk are like, don't like to blow their own trumpets (well, they had the camels didn't they) Can't really see him as "Cpl Death, scurge of the Nazi's, rescuer of virgins.....deflowerer of camels" (sorry Grandad) He didn't die in the war, if he did I wouldn't be here, so.........Cheers Hitler, you crazy murdering meglomaniac!


Edited to add, Oh, he went AWOL too, dragged out of his house by the RMP, bless him. Whilst I don't condone this sort of behaviour and have suitably chastised him on a number of occassions (before shuffling off to the big demob depot in the sky), who can blame him at a time like that? Not I.
 

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