When it comes to vacating my bowels Im not renound for being too choosy about where and when, as I have embarrassingly confessed to on several threads. In my defense there is a direct correlation between my toilet standards & alcohol consumed. However the other week I had I life changing experience, I was visiting our European neighbours in Denmark and after a few days of consuming nothing but beer and fish my guts were in rag order. Standing in bar I could feel my colon tying knots in itself, my palms starting to sweat as I clenched my bum cheeks tight to stop my sphincter dilating. Nervously I scanned the room for the nearest toilet, failing that the largest plant pot or beer glass. Not being able to speak a word of the lingo I spotted a door with a picture of a one legged chick on it and made my escape. I pushed open the trap door and there it stood in all it glory, a glistening porcelain charger. I promptly dropped my trollies, mounted it, rode it, wiped up (adopting the 3 wipes then check method), stood up and went to flush it. After several confusing moments and a rush of panic as I spied the mud monster lurking in the pan, I spied the sensor, waved my hand and it went off, sucking my beer/pickled herring combo into the abyss. Butâ¦. not only did this toilet flush with a royal wave of my left hand, the whole toilet seat rotated 360deg to clean itself!! I stood in absolute awe, I had to do it againâ¦.. and again. It made what normally would have been an uncomfortable, squatting to avoid sitting, realizing to late there was no toilet paper experience, into a pleasurable one. I donât care who you are, we all value the precious few moments of peace, followed by relief when having a dump. This should be a celebrated experience and like our European neighbours we should make it as enjoyable as possible. I have so many god awful experiences with ill equipped ablutions, granted sometimes that was due to my choice of location (behind a phonebox, down the side of the bath etc). But in Denmark they had it so right, I would make a return visit just to use that crapper. Anyone else found such magic in the WC, what makes the perfect crapper?