Cats. Feline funnies and other stuff.

Love 'em or hate 'em, they've been living with and around humans since prehistoric times, at least 9,500 yrs, probably even back at least to the 8th century. They can function quite well as vermin killers, especially on farms and were even used for retrieving in hunting by the ancient Egyptians. There is a saying 'Dogs have masters...cats have servants.'

What are your thoughts on cats? Have you as a cat owner any advice for other cat owners, or potential owners? or stories, pics of your own cat etc to show?

This is not meant to be a cat V dog thread, it's mainly for interesting or funny anecdotes, advice and pics etc.

I never bothered one way or another about cats until we took a kitten from a friend in 1983, since that one, we've had 2 Maine Coons and 3 Bengals, 2 of which we still have, and I freely admit to being a real admirer of them now, especially the Bengals. All of them have been brought up alongside Staffies and have been treated by them as if they were other dogs, even though the dogs won't tolerate any other cats.
Digger and Duncan fighting as usual
Picture 004.jpg


War Hero
Book Reviewer
Mine is called "The enigmatic Colonel Walter E. Kurtz" to give him his full title,he answers to Kurtz if there is food in the bargain or Shithead in the early hours. I couldnt imagine life without him,he has been run over three times and attacked by a fox once. I rather suspect he is the Cat equivilent of Barnes in Platoon.
Im always reminded of the Far side cartoon which show a bloke holding a cat up in front of a mirror which isnt showing any reflection.The caption is "Just as I always suspected!"


Kit Reviewer
Book Reviewer
My mum is like that mad old lady from the Simpsons who has millions of cats. On last inspection she had 6. One of them was my cat when I used to live there which means it must be about 20 years old now.

The missus also has a cat which is absolutely nails, a few months ago it had a fight with a police car and broke it's jaw, two days later it was squaring up to all the other cats in the neighbourhood, albeit with a bit of a limp and a slightly mongy jaw.

I think they are both girls, to be honest I haven't really looked, I respect their privacy. Problem is I can't touch them because I am horrendously allergic to them, it's like being CS gassed when I go near them and it brings me out in rashes and hot and cold sweats.

Smudge the ancient cat:

Sprite the nails cat:


Book Reviewer
You might as well have named the thread 'I wear comfortable shoes and am good with colours' and been done with it.
Co sign montys opening post, until you'v owned a cat you dont know, technically its my birds but I love the ginger little shite all the same. I used to hate them though, they recon cats can see into your soul and if they like you your a good person. Im a convert.

Cats rule dogs drewl etc etc.
They are evil, slinky, haughty, drop fur everywhere, shred your curtains, leave half eaten mice on your doorstep, poo in next doors flower beds, scratch your leather sofa, eat really smelly food, are aloof and snotty and I have 3 of them :D
Owning a cat is a statement, that you're secure enough in yourself not to need a sense of slavish, unquestioning devotion in a pet.

Correction: Being owned by a cat. Sorry.
An ex of mine had a cat called Felix (black and white with big paws) he was an annoying little twat. Always at your food, hair everywhere and once shit on my trainers. The little git would even get in my side of the bed when I got up for a wazz in the middle of the night.

I got home one night and found him all over the path at the bottom of the road. Some fcuker on a trial bike had hit him. The first and only 'pet' I ever had and wouldn't have another as the pain of loosing a bloody animal that got on my tits was just too much.

I really had grown to love the little cnut. Weird
As Pratchett puts it, 'if cats looked like frogs, we'd realise what evil bastards they really are'.

Been trying to arrange a plausable death for the wifes dog now for months so I can retrieve my own cat with 'small man syndrome' from my grey haired old mum.
YouTube - Simon's Cat 'Cat Man Do'

Watch all of the "Simons Cat" videos on youtube, they're excellent.[/QUOTE]
PrinceAlbert, funny video. My two are still looking for the cat after I played this and they heard it. :)

They are bro and sis, 2yrs old now, this is them about a year ago.



Made a decent pillow as a kitten...
We have 3 cats, bundles of fun until it gets dark, Sooty scatches to get out, let him out and Bobby goes with him, this is normally about 0430, Ginger doesent like going out early but likes an early feed so when I get back in bed he walks all over my head and chest until I get up again and feed him, but I have to say I still am a pussy lover though!!!
Had Dogs all my life, never liked Cats. Then the wife arrived and brought a kitten with her and I'm a convert. It Kills everything it comes across, drags home Ducks from the canal at the back of the house usually still quacking its bill off. Quick smack and we're having Duck for tea. With a the canal and nature green at the back we never have trouble with Mice or Rats unlike the neighbours.
The wife feeds it and it pays her no attention whatsoever and will only go near me and medium size daughter.
10 years old now and still running around like a kitten, At our old house the next door neighbour a Police dog handler use to shake his head at the cat dropping off the fence into his yard to steal the food from his 35kg Alsatian, While the dog hid in its kennel.
biggest mistake I ever made in my life, was opening a sack we discovered floating in a dalby creek in 1996, it was acute little ball of fluff, which decided we were decent enough to live with, after the first 6 weeks I christened him Bastard, thank fxxx he cant talk, he rules the house, we had to get our post box put outside the garden gate because he attacks the postman, he has catflaps in 3 doors , but he rings the front door bell to be let in, he is our whippets best mate ,but wont let any other dog on the property, our dog thinks she is human, our cat thinks he is God