In keeping with the theme of my thread pertaining to daft recruiting questions (and because I have too much time on my hands as work is slow at the moment), I would like to start a similar thread pertaining to silly questions relating to the wearing of uniforms. that are found on this site I would suggest that the questions fall into five broad categories and are determined by the nature of the OP namely the Angel Gabriel, the Captain Mainly-Waring, the Pte Piss-taker, Corporal Punishment- Fetish and the more sinister Captain McIlwraith. Angel Gabriel The Angel Gabriel is a nice chap who wants to let all his online mates know that he has recently achieved a well deserved promotion but is too modest to say Lads Ive just been promoted Sergeant, WO2, 2Lt or Major; therefore, he asks questions about: buying mess kit, where to buy pace sticks, service dress; and field officer cap bling. Despite the obvious response of go and ask your PMC, Adj, Training Major or mates who have recently been promoted, this tends to elicit a fairly mild response from users but the detail provided makes Arrse essential reading to the last category the Captain McIlwraith. I therefore suggest that a suitable response should be a simple congratulations. Captain Mainly-Wearing Again, Captain Mainly-Wearing is quite an innocuous sort of a bloke, modest career and takes an inordinate pride in his TA/ACF/CCF commission as he believes that it elevates his social standing to that of an officer and a gentleman. Therefore, he asks questions about: swords, blue patrols, pinkie rings; and swagger sticks . He is often tempted to get married or attend civilian functions in his uniform. However, his lack of contacts within his Regiment/Corps, (which is whatever cap badge the kids in his care happen to wear) combined with his modest income means that he ends up Mainly-Wearing (but not quite) the proper kit and he risks the pantomime effect seen in the recently propagated photo. I recommend that each regiment or corps maintains a suitably tailored correct dress uniform and mess kit specifically for the use of overweight middle aged ACF subbies. This will minimise and mitigate the risk of making the Regiment or Corps a laughing stock. I further propose that a response to their queries on here should be a referral to said supply of uniforms. Pte Piss-taker A bored individual, probably an OR/JNCO, who is whiling away a slow afternoon trying to wind up the WO/officer classes (represented by the Angel Gabriel and Captain Mainly-Wearing) by asking absurd questions like: Can I get married wearing my grandads old HAC Pikemans uniform? Can I attend a ball dressed as an SAS Colonel if I remove all the badges? Is it ok to wear my dads medals on my number 2s? I saw this teenaged bloke at Remembrance Sunday wearing a Guards Tie, a sandy beret, a VC and Boer War medals; do you think he may be a Walt? A bit of innocuous piss taking never goes astray and anybody who bites is as daft as they are. Corporal Punishment- Fetish There are people who derive sexual excitement from dressing in Military kit. Last time I was in Mayfair, I walked past a queue of Japanese Admirals, SS Obergruppen, USMC Colonels , Idi Amein look alikes and a few Para/ SAS Majors and Richard Sharpe clones outside a fetish ball. I would be surprised if some of these strange individuals did not find expression of their fetish on this site but tbh I have no idea what sort of questions they would ask but probably involve riding crops, jack boots and spurs! Captain McIlwraith Mad or Bad Walts will no doubt scour this site for tips to enhance their fantasy or to gain credibility for their scams. Therefore, I would treat any queries about Para, SAS, SBS or RM uniforms, the order of gallantry medals or the wearing of kilts with extreme scepticism. Therefore, to get to my point, are there any categories I have missed and what is the most stupid question that each category might ask?