Carol Vorderman

Would you shag Carol?

  • Yes...Like a tramp on chips

    Votes: 291 82.0%
  • No...Not even with yours

    Votes: 30 8.5%
  • Meh

    Votes: 30 8.5%
  • Question not applicable, I'm greenbaggyskin, and I play the pink oboe

    Votes: 4 1.1%

  • Total voters
    355
Well she's;

a) dead &
b) looked like Mr Spock with long hair hiding the pointy ears.
View attachment 372032
Yes quite true, however she did once confess the only thing that upper-class women were good at was sex, as they were useless at everything else. So face like a busted goat she might have had but a nuclear powered cabbage by all accounts. Thinking on, the loverly Princess Di, was upper class was she not, and she let Brian in there quite often.
 
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Auld-Yin

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Never mind CV, what about the luverly Lorraine Kelly, pic taken at 50 and still in her 50s and v v tidy

article-0-0925E400000005DC-553_224x488.jpg
 
Mary Millington, anybody?
1555784029992.jpeg
1555784029992.jpeg

She was a world famous Nymphomaniac who in the early 70’s graced the pages of a dirty mag called Whitehouse.
So one of the stunts she would do, is go to a place and pick up somebody/anybody seriously and for a feature article in the magazine give the bloke a right old dirty time. It didn’t matter who said punter was and that was the attraction as it gave the impression that anybody could have a dirty old time with her (Owner of West Ham United is the magazine proprietor Paul Gold).
Cpl Ging D went out one evening for a few beers, I was duty driver. Phone call about 11 O'clock can I pick him up? So arriving at the spot there was Ging, with a vaguely familiar looking bird on his arm. Fond good nights later we were on our way back to Camp (RAF Thorney Island, Home of 55Air Despatch Sqn RCT), thereupon Ging let loose with the dirtiest tale of lust and fornication, been drinking in a well known drinking hole in Chichester called ‘All the Worlds a Stage’, and said Mary Middleton had picked him up over a pint by the simple expediency of shoving her hand down his kecks. Next thing you know he’s lost in 2/3 hours of the filthiest muck with her cabbage (thank you mum’s net) anybody could think off. All for a photo, and a few simple questions as to what he thought of the 4’ 10” charmer.
Bollocks said I not true. Until the next edition of Whitehouse came out and his personal copy with Mary’s thank you big boy all over it arrived via 1st Class post.
 
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Mary Millington, anybody?
View attachment 388861 View attachment 388861
She was a world famous a nyphomanic who in the early 70’s graced the pages of a dirty mag called Whitehouse.
So one of the stunts she would do, is go to a place and pick up somebody/anybody seriously and for a feature article in the magazine give the bloke a right old dirty time. It didn’t matter who said punter was and that was the attraction as it gave the impression that anybody could have a dirty old time with her (Owner of West Ham United was the magazine proprietor Paul Gold).
Cpl Ging D went out one evening for a few beers, I was duty driver. Phone call about 11 O'clock can I pick him up? So arriving at the spot there was Ging, with a vaguely familiar looking bird on his arm. Fond good nights later we were on our way back to Camp (RAF Thorney Island, Home of 55Air Despatch Sqn RCT), thereupon Ging let loose with the dirtiest tale of lust and fornication, been drinking in a well known drinking hole in Chichester called ‘All the Worlds a Stage’, and said Mary Middleton had picked him up over a pint by the simple expediency of shoving her hand down his kecks. Next thing you know he’s lost in 2/3 hours of the filthiest muck with her cabbage (thank you mum’s net) anybody could think off. All for a photo, and a few simple questions as to what he thought of the 5’ nothing charmer.
Bollocks said I not true. Until the next edition of Whitehouse came out and his personal copy with Mary’s thank you big boy all over it arrived via 1st Class post.
Do you really need to ask? I most emphatically would
 
What if Carol Vorderman worked out and could run 1500 meters in a good time? Would she be fit??
She could do the 1500m in a really bad time and still be fit?
 

Auld-Yin

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NoNoNoNo

Jocks fancy Lorraine. It's in the genes.

Poofs don't fancy Carol Vorderman

This is Natural Law.
Raving ghey trying to hide the fact behind a faked lust for CV!
 
Raving ghey trying to hide the fact behind a faked lust for CV!
Do you have any more red herring in your elderly sporran?

Feel free to worship at the feet of Ms Kelly.

I'm sure she's a true sex goddess, to freckled ginger jockanese fellers raised over successive long winters by the thousand, to worship women with flesh like hers: reminiscent of badly made, raw pastry.
 

Auld-Yin

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Do you have any more red herring in your elderly sporran?

Feel free to worship at the feet of Ms Kelly.

I'm sure she's a true sex goddess, to freckled ginger jockanese fellers raised over successive long winters by the thousand, to worship women with flesh like hers: reminiscent of badly made, raw pastry.
Gheyer than a ghey thing at a ghey festival! :flower:
 
Do you have any more red herring in your elderly sporran?

Feel free to worship at the feet of Ms Kelly.

I'm sure she's a true sex goddess, to freckled ginger jockanese fellers raised over successive long winters by the thousand, to worship women with flesh like hers: reminiscent of badly made, raw pastry.
Real or fake; you decide.

 
NoNoNoNo

Jocks fancy Lorraine. It's in the genes.

Poofs don't fancy Carol Vorderman

This is Natural Law.
Fuck. Off. Right. Fucking. Now!

She's kind of pretty, in an aging spinster desperate to not die a virgin way, but that cunting 'chirpy' personality makes me want to disembowel her, just so I can strangle her with her own bloody entrails.
 

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