Carol Concerts - why do we still hold them?

Discussion in 'The Intelligence Cell' started by Litotes, Dec 20, 2007.

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  1. Yesterday was the day of Christmas cheer in the Garrison and everyone is demob happy now that we are over the hump of .... The Carol Concert!

    Why do we do it? We gather several hundred blokes, a few women and the Adjutant's dog in one place, in front of the Padre, and we try to sing carols.

    The organist, bless her heart, tried her best, but there was no way she could hear the Padre yelling at her to stop because half the Garrison had been suddenly struck dumb and the other half was singing two bars behind and flat! It was awful. Luckily, the dog stayed mute which is more than can be said for the Gar Comd who was seen muttering sotto voce to no-one in particular.... and no-one was listening either!

    It was at that point I noticed that one soldier on the back row had thoughtfully brought along his own ear defenders on a white string and was blissfuly unaware of the cacophany. I might try that next year!

    I used to think that carol services were part of the agony of Christmas and we had to put up with them, but that was when I was at the back of the audience and relatively insulated from the noise, and children were taught to sing carols in school. Now that teenagers leave school with only the barest idea of how to sing hymns and carols, and I am at the front of the church, it is murder to have to listen to so many different versions of Away in a Manger - one from each person in my vicinity. King's College, Cambridge, it ain't!

    If we are serious about Garrison carol singing every year, surely we should form a training team and practise until we sound reasonable? Why can't we add carol singing to the Phase 1 training programme, FFS? It could be ITD13 - Hymns and Carols! We are, after all, a largely Christian organisation. Of course, an additional benefit would be that the singing at funerals would be a lot better. I wonder if CGS could be persuaded to agree to an additional ITD and 3 days of Phase 1 training?!

    Or do we admit defeat, agree that we are not a Christian organisation and ban Christmas Carol concerts?

    Just a Christmas thought!


    Bah Humbug!
  2. Having just read a thread on the PC brigade, I am surprised they haven't sunk their teeth into this concept yet.

    Surely, a Carol Concert is sexist ?? Why don't we have Carl Concerts ?
  3. The DS answer is we hold them as "an act of discipline", which is the CoCs way of saying "dunno, mate".
  4. maybe we should have a person of indeterminate gender concert instead :wink:
  5. Because without them we wouldn't have anything to do before us juniors get to throw sprouts at the RSM then get smashed up in the NAAFI by 1400 while still in uniform?

    They'd just fill the time in with yet another "have a quick walk round the areas before Christmas" if we didn't have them.
  6. The purpose of thing type of thing is so that the CO gets a good chit on his annual CR. Pointless IMHO. You should declare yourself a Druid - but you need to AWOL on the longest day lest you need to start performing in a sheet.
  7. I thoughtfully booked the Padre for a Christmas morning service at our Squadron location in Bosnia once. The singing was so atrocious, he gave us a show again on Hark the Herald Angels. He wasn´t asked to stay for lunch.
  8. Show Carols Properly Sung? LOL :) Tears of laughter...................
  9. tried claiming was one.. didnt get me out of it, just earnt me a spot on the front row next to the ssm :roll:
  10. You should sue for religious discrimination.
  11. Why are they held.....It could be that a lot of people enjoy them
  12. Just barely on thread, this reminds of an alleged anecdote about RSM Ronald Brittain, apparently had the loudest voice in the Army at the time. Patrolling up and down the church aisle at a non denominational service with pace stick jammed up his armpit. Young squaddie flew in late and thinking the RSM hadnt seen him, slid into the nearst pew and made like a mushroom.

    (Alas the poor we mite) forgot to remove his headcovering. Brittain walked up the aisle, faced it square on and bellowed, "Oi you....take ur at orft in the house of the Lord you Cnut" ...priceless :)