Car keyed

Discussion in 'The NAAFI Bar' started by Tiddle, Jun 20, 2009.

Welcome to the Army Rumour Service, ARRSE

The UK's largest and busiest UNofficial military website.

The heart of the site is the forum area, including:

  1. Both my motors have been keyed in the space of two months, one car right down to bare metal and the other less aggressively but in several places over several times. Each time it's defiantly happened in my own street, a quiet cul-de-sac.

    Neither of my cars are "showy" or "bling", one is a 7 year old Rover 75 and the other is a 12 year old Rover 200 so I don't think jealousy has played a part!

    I informally reported the first time to the politzi but haven't bothered since as their response was to give me a crime number and let my insurance sort it out.

    Short of installing CCTV any ideas? I'm toying with the idea of sticking my little one into a OP over looking the street but at 4 months I don't think he's up to the challenge just yet.
     
  2. 4 months?

    Not up to a full on ambush, but an OP shouldnt be an issue.
     
  3. A very large German Sheperd( dog, not sheep owner) I use 2 as it just might be posible to get away from one but 2 ensures hospital
     
  4. It will be some one you know. At lights out go to an upstairs room overlooking the vehicles. Have the curtains slightly open at the side and watch for a couple of hours. Don't put your face to gap.

    You will only have to wait for a couple of hours, they don't stay up late.
     
  5. Find the fcuker and key his wife...

    Or, just observe for a few hours each night...
     
  6. The purchase and upkeep of the animals probably outdoes the cost of the vehicles concerned.
     
  7. Tiddle. Don't mean to be a wet blanket but I've got the same prob here. "Old Bill" will not help, in fact they will side with the perpetrators should you take appropriate action against the offenders.
     
  8. BuggerAll

    BuggerAll LE Reviewer Book Reviewer

    Why is it that so much of the youth of today place so much emphasis on 'respect' yet are incapable of respecting other people and their property?
     
  9. spike7451

    spike7451 RIP

    Because they cant nick it so they destroy it.
     
  10. Covert CCTV is the best option. Also glue a £2 coin on the pavement next to the cars. Will provide amusement for when your cars arent being keyed.
     
  11. As mentioned above, watch and wait.
    Once spotted, grab the little scrote and shove a red hot key up his arsse sideways until he chokes on it.
    Pop the key in the fire to be nicely warming while you wait.
    One of these should suffice.
     

    Attached Files:

  12. Good question Bugg. The answer is that Sub-Saharans are virtually untouchable by the forces of law and order. Our young emulate their uncivilized activities, forgeting who they really are. Must stop now before the PC morons latch on.
     
  13. Covert CCTV is the best option, not for evidence but for finding the fucker who's doing it, and then well take revenge as you wish.....
     
  14. A good OP and a high power laser pointer of the type that fcukwits fire up at landing aircraft.

    Failing that, an aluminium baseball bat and two weeks hard beasting on upper body work in the gym before taking your swing!!

    These mindless cnuts should all have their headless corpses stuffed upside down on poles along the roadside outside local primary schools as a warning to kids as to what to expect should they choose a career of anti-social behaviour.

    ASBO = Anti Social Beheading Order

    There endeth the voice of rational reason!!
     
  15. Hang on Tiddle.... you have a 12 year old Rover that's getting keyed? and a 7 year old 75?

    Now I can understand a 6 month old BMW X5 in metallic black, with chrome spinners, lowered suspension, mega wide low profile wheels and blacked out windows getting keyed for no reason.... the drivers clearly a cunt.

    But you drive a 12 year old Rover 25 that's getting keyed?

    Who are you upsetting exactly? It's clearly someone you know and have pissed off.