Captions please

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#3
Be careful, I am pre-menstral and I had guinness last night!!


(Just a thought - where is she hiding the legs of lamb.)
 
#9
We have a winner

visitingrock said:
"That's it love, get your arse over. This'll teach them not to let their cat sh!t in our garden"
Now THAT's comedy :D :judge:
 
#11
Bloke in blue shirt 'So thats where my kebab disappeared to'
 
#12
Guy on the phone to ops room.

"Are we missing any fish 'cos I think she may be hiding some"
 
#13
Bloke on the phone:

'Hello, is that the ambulance service?'

'Yes sir'

'I called for an ambulance just now 'cos my wife's contractions had started'

'Yes sir, it'll be with you in 5 mins'

'No, cancel it. She gave birth on the garden fence'

What?! Is the baby ok?'

'Dunno, it's in next-door's garden'

'Oh, ok....'
 
#16
visitingrock said:
From here:



"That's it love, get your arse over. This'll teach them not to let their cat sh!t in our garden"
"Hello mate, its your wife."

"What about my wife?"

"She's got her fanny snagged on the fence mate." "We're worried about her, we're hanging onto the string from her tampax." Has she had the coil fitted?"

"The coil..., the size of her fanny, she could have had carpets fitted." "Do me a favour?"

"What's that?"

"Ferking drop her...."
 
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