Can I Have my Old Values Back?

Discussion in 'The Lamp and Sandbag II - The Tall Story Strikes B' started by exbleep, Jan 10, 2010.

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  1. No, I don't mean honouring thy mother and thy father or even being nice to neighbours.
    I mean the old inches, pounds, shillings etc.
    The weather news all week has been "up to 5 centimetres of snow" is expected etc. Christ, that's only just under 2 inches but seems massive! No wonder the country has gone snow crazy. Minus 5 tonight! No it isn't, it's plus 21. Have you noticed how we use the Centigrade when it's cold, as in "zero degrees" when it's really 32 but we use Fahrenheit in the summer as in "temperatures may top 100 degrees"? Don't get them mixed up cos 100 C would be boiling.
    And can you lot envisage something that is 1.828 metres by 22.86 cm? (6 feet by 9 inches, now that I can visualise).
    And how can you tell someone is tall by saying he's over 1.8 metres? Now, he's a six footer makes sense.
    And this crap money. Had to buy a pack of fags today and, rather than drag myself to the corner shop where they are £4.37 I wen to the nearest Co-op where they are £4.70. Only 33p difference, thinks I. Hang on, that's almost 7 shillings a pack difference! Used to use the public bars where the beer was 1/10d as opposed to the lounge where they charged 1/11d and that was only 1d difference. That would be, ermm, 0.49 of these new pees. And at least when it was a d we used to say pence (well, punce, really) but now its a pence we say pee. Horrible.
    Even the supermarkets are conning us in the way they sell packed goods which say 454g which is really the old pound. Why not say a pound?
    Even them big bottles of milk have 1.9 litres on them but do have the decency to have 4 pints in bigger letters.
    Of course, the septics got it right with their measures. They call half a litre a pint and litre is a quart, hence the gallon is exactly 4 litres there but here it's 4.546. Plus I know what it means when I get 35 miles to the gallon out of my car but Christ only knows how good it is when I'm told how many litres to the 100 km it does.
    And were kids a bit more arithmetically competent when they had to know there were 8 half crowns in a pound, 12d in a shilling and 20 shillings to the pound or 240d? Now it's easy, they don't seem to bother. Had a bill at the supermarket the other day that was 4.30 so I gave a fiver and 30p to get the quid back. That's not right, said the halfwit behind the till and couldn't work out they had to give me a pound back! And the number of times you buy two items at, say, 35p and they have to use a calculator to work out how much it is!
    Anyway, if the ranting of an old (ish) man with a slight smell of wee offends you, or you have no idea what a d is, let alone a shilling, you shouldn't be on this part of the site, anyway.
  2. A slight smell of wee is always offensive, no question. My Gran was extremely offensive, rest her cotton socks and whiffy nightie. Of course we know what a D is, it's next to S, the E and the F. Think we're stupid or something :?
  3. Fugly

    Fugly LE DirtyBAT

    Oh belt up you old bastard :D
  4. JPS Blue!
  5. Cutaway

    Cutaway LE Reviewer

    Flash bastard !
    No. 6 - or Embassy if you're feeling flush.
  6. I miss cigarettes that had tobacco...not this shite that fizzes and pops like a firework :x and Embassy is one of the biggest offenders.

    now waits for people to tell me to stop smoking.

    do one :)
  7. Cutaway

    Cutaway LE Reviewer

    Embassy didn't used to, it was only Marlboro that 'lep about.'
  8. No, agree totally. Refusing to give up, gone that stage further and smoke a pipe, on duty, in uniform.... because according to the drill manual, I can.
  9. Go the whole hog
    and kit yourself out with a big bad sherlock holmes type, complete with hinged lid, and cut around barracks with an air and a swagger.

    I,d actually pay good money to see that :lol: :lol:
  10. It hasn't got a hinged lid, but it has the whole big f**k off bend in it. Tragically, I am sans tache, but having a shagged leg does mean I have a walking stick. Goes great with my Denison Smock. :D
  11. AlienFTM

    AlienFTM LE Book Reviewer

    One good thing about self-service tills in the supermarket. When you have an amount to pay and you have the odd cash so that you can get a note back and use up your shrapnel, but the shrapnel in first, then the note then wait for the change to come back in a single smaller note.

    The change machine never looks blankly at me and says, "What are you doing?" It just gets on with it.
  12. rampant

    rampant LE Reviewer Book Reviewer

    L&B or Richmond? 'cos up in Glasgow it cost more han £6.00 for Marlboro Reds (swine)
  13. I think you'll find that the children of today are very knowledgeable about Imperial weights. Or at least about fractions of them like eighths...
  14. Humph! Always gives me the change in pennies while the other shoppers look on thinking that I've won the jackpot.
  15. An acquaintance of my parents used to carry two packets of fags. Benson & hedges for himself & Players No 6 if he was trapped like a rat in a corner & forced to crash the ash.

    "Bloody Eric" also seemed to be able to get a tab out & on the go without anyone even seeing him reach into his pockets or light up...