Can A Relationship Work And Be Healthy In The Military?

Hey guys, I'm so close to being in a relationship with this girl that I really like and she likes me, there's no doubt about it as we've talked about it previously but we've put anything on hold due to my career intentions, because I'm also the click of a button away from submitting my Air Force application. She's going to university and I'd be going into the Air Force. I don't believe this is just a teenage fling or friends with benefits thing - I believe we're both pretty serious about one another.

Can a relationship work and be good under those circumstances? I'd be stationed no where near her as the nearest base to her university is about 200 miles away and even then that would be assuming I'd be stationed at that base otherwise we're looking at double or possibly triple that distance. That is also after training of near 2 years where I would be 300-400 miles away for sure. I believe generally I'd work Mon-Friday and get 6 weeks leave a year. She would be following a university year structure obviously which I believe is September to early December, Christmas Break, January to June, Summer. University never appealed to me so I don't know too much about it.

I hope this doesn't come across rude but I'm not looking for answers like 'If you like her enough you'll make it work', I'm looking for opinions, experiences or solutions of any kind.

Appreciate all you do for those currently or who have previously served, thanks for the help in advance.
 

Switchback

War Hero
She's going to university? You are joining the forces?

Good luck.......

My personal opinion, shag her (or don't) but either way crack on as a free and single bloke. You'll have a mega time in the forces as a young single bloke, far too busy getting yourself on tours and deployments and lashing it up with the boys enjoying yourself for a few years to worry about a missus.
 
Your both going to go through big changes. She's probably going to have blokes hitting on her, you'll inevitably get drunk and run round after every piece of skirt with your dick on your head.

Try making a relationship work, good for you if you can, but don't die in a ditch if you grow apart.
 
Long distance isn't easy, you will be forging new friendships and be busy at work, you may start off by going to see her at every opportunity you get but inevitably that may diminish over time. It will boil down to how committed and honest you both are however I don't think any of can predict if it will work. You both have to suck it and see
 
I've had two pints and this already looks like a traditional Friday wind up thread.

If you are doubtful about this relationship, not sure how it's going to pan out etc, then the relationship isn't even worth a light.
 

The_Snail

ADC
RIP
This post's over an hour and a half old and nobody has stressed the need for photographs of said bint to reach a meaningful conclusion.
Get a grip you bunch of new age weirdos.


Oh, RAF. Carry on chaps, chocks away etc.
 
Don't listen to these pongos, they wouldn't know anything about being chased by skirt. When you put that blue suit on, women will literally throw their knickers at you. If you don't try and shag them all, you should consider joining the navy.
 

The_Snail

ADC
RIP
This post's over an hour and a half old and nobody has stressed the need for photographs of said bint to reach a meaningful conclusion.
Get a grip you bunch of new age weirdos.


Oh, RAF. Carry on chaps, chocks away etc.
RAF Forum.

Your mum sucks tramps off.
 
This isn't really a military question, it's a human nature question. Whether you were joining the forces or doing anything else that kept you a few hundred km apart, the problem would be the same.

That doesn't answer your question, but basically it's the separation that's going to be the problem, not the fact that you'll be wearing an ill-fitting light-blue uniform :p
 

scotslass

Old-Salt
Don't base major life decisions on a relationship. Go for the career, and if it's meant to work out with her, it will do.

I've known a fair few men who have jacked in a military career because they've been "head over heels" for "the one". They then regret it bitterly when the relationship ends and they realise they've been left with a fat lot of nothing. If she really loved you, she'd be telling you to crack on with it, and that the two of you will find a way to make it work.


Edited to add: my ex told me it was him or the military. I stupidly chose him, and then when it went the way it was always going to go, I was left trying to get in uncomfortably close to the upper age limit.
 
Last edited:

The_Snail

ADC
RIP
200 miles apart and she's at uni, eh.

Go to hers through term. Death stare the blokes and mention thinks like '5 miles of death'. Basically the human version of p*ssing on her leg.

Whilst there conduct HERA on secondary and tertiary positions, should the primary objective fail. Or indeed a much better offer crops up.

In school holidays bring her to you. She can tidy your grot and you can perhaps use some of your leave to whisk her to somewhere classy but on offer with tom cook, etc. Remember the point above about better offers whilst on holidays.

Live everyday as your last (in the relationship) so spoil her every chance you get. Remember she will enjoy giving you head and she will enjoy an*l.

Did I say spoil? I meant despoil.
 
The question you should perhaps be asking yourself is 'as I'm in a serious relationship and thinking about it's impact in my career, am I sufficiently committed to the RAF?'

Dependent up your specialisation, I also wouldn't assume you'll be working Mon-Fri or that you'll get anything like 6 weeks annual leave.

May I ask what branch or trade you're joining?

Regards,
MM
 

The_Snail

ADC
RIP
The question you should perhaps be asking yourself is 'as I'm in a serious relationship and thinking about it's impact in my career, am I sufficiently committed to the RAF?'

Dependent up your specialisation, I also wouldn't assume you'll be working Mon-Fri or that you'll get anything like 6 weeks annual leave.

May I ask what branch or trade you're joining?

Regards,
MM
I love the way you're dealing with this so well.
 

Latest Threads

Top