Cadre courses

Discussion in 'Gunners' started by slippery_weavel, Feb 7, 2008.

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  1. Ok, some twisted individual has deemed me suitable of going on a lance-jacks course in the very near future.

    What's taxing my small amount of gray matter at the moment (and there isn't a lot) is the 20 minute lesson/get up in front of everyone and talk part. Does anyone have any ideas/past experiences of this bit of the course?
  2. Depends what you are expected to do. If you are expected to give a lesson, then they should teach you how to do such things.

    If it is a "20 mins on me" icebreaker sketch, then I would keep it relevant and funny.

    Don't go all misty eyed on why you joined up, and how it was the best thing you ever did, and how all the mates you knew are on crack and are thieves and you "dabbled" and could have ended up like them.(like one lad did, I nearly had to call the padre (for me I was so depressed by the end of his "confessional")).

    I'd suggest a quick few lines on where you hail from, what you may have done before the Army, if anything. What you do outside of the Army, Funny anecdotes from training. what you do and where you want to go (again nothing to mad on this). Pets and funny civvie stories are good, as long as they don't drag on for half the time, and the civvie stories are funny. Teams supported and sports played are normally quite good, esp if they are exotic.

    Although, draw short of tellings us how you left your country and joined the British Army to get away from your childhood girlfriend who you got up the duff. (another classic I was subjected too!!!!!)
  3. When I did mine (Waaaaaaaay back in 1993) We didn't get a choice about what we spoke about, we had to delve into the course TSM's beret and pull out a slip of paper with a subject on, then had that night in front of a mirror to practice our 20 minute lecture.

    Mine was: "The effect of credit card fraud on the Badger population of North Wales"

    I don't think I had them rolling in the aisles, but with a bit of practice, a couple of crib cards and by following the age old Army lesson plan that everything has a beginning (5 mins) , a middle (10 mins) and an end (5 mins) you should be able to speak about anything eloquently for around 20 minutes.

    But then I always was something of a gobshite....
  4. How about , How to make the perfect cuppa...lots of class participation .lots of ,watch this way etc etc :D :D
  5. Sympathetic_Reaction

    Sympathetic_Reaction LE Book Reviewer

    One classic I had in a similar vein was

    'the sex life of 2 atoms inside a ping pong ball'

    Amazing the level of imagination in a squaddies head.

  6. Something like that is absolutely perfect. You're talking about something that everyone knows how to do, so when you stumble it's easy to pick up on your subject matter again.

    Don't forget that what they're assessing here, is your abilty to speak clearly and consisely, with confidence. Your subject matter is irrelavent.

    One bloke on my cadre was given the Rear TMH locking pin from his rifle to talk about for 20 minutes. I never realised that the groove in the pin was actually there to give you a clue as to when to stop pushing it up your nose....
  7. I have seen this lesson done......not sure about H&S regs nowadays...but if it goes well ..lots of brownie a brew for DS :D

    once saw a mate do setting up a fishing rod ,real, line,float ,hook etc... dont try this as most people nearly had their eyes poked out...
  8. Some other classics were

    "Birds from Amesbury and the diseases they carry"

    It was meant to be about the feathered variety but we had 20 minutes on the Lesser Spotted Drinks Ponce, The speckled prick-tease and The Ron Hill Stilletto warbler....

    and I will never forget "Why I love the RSM more than my Mum"
  9. Lbdr ........check PM

  10. 20 minutes on the Lance Jack course seems a bit harsh! Alright, it's what a lot of us did way back when (pull up the sandbag and swing that lattern), but having just run a DIT course half of the lads waiting to go onto the full screws course suffered BIG style with a 20 minute lesson. I would (if I were running a LBdr Course) opt for a 5 minute ice breaker. Not you choice I know but trust me...that will be plenty long enough for some!
  11. On mine in 19?? We had one lad do a lesson on how to make the perfect Baked Alaska!! Feckin tasted good as well. Well done Tony (Raaasta) Ho!
  12. might be! :wink:
  13. Spanish_Dave

    Spanish_Dave LE Good Egg (charities)

    I can remember Brummy Wal***y in 2nd Fd delivering a lesson on "Tin mining in Whales" how we laughed :lol:
  14. 20 mins ????? are you sure ? or is it part of this bit/dit whatever its called.I only did 5 or 10 mins on my lance jacks course and the same on the full screws,mind you it was years ago ,the TO's cant have changed that much surely.
  15. Just a thought but just as the recent scandal about kids ripping off essays from t'internet, is this not the same do we want to dumbing this vital part of a potential JNCO's development....