Would any of you mind if some twat of an army cadet who is joining the army in september joined your post? (me)

Ben agree with PTP welcome on board, why not come and have a beer with yer uncle MDN in the NAAFI bar.

Stay away from Prodigal, Leeanne and Sniper bird though, they'll only try and show you thier puppies ;D
Garry Glitter with a Dudley accent pipes up ;D

Ben, sorry my warning to you should have included Lipstick, she's 58 and on the prowl for young bucks with no body hair

Delighted to have you on board, though would appreciate it if you would register rather than post as a guest.

Moving this off to the NAAFI before it degenerates even further into the usual pointless slanging match.
Woopert good of you to escort the young man to the bar.

Have a double asbach and coke for starters, then we'll break out the bog roll, white spirit and the music system ;D

Sticklips: If your looking for someone with a level of maturity suggest you look somewhere other than the ARRSE site ;D
Wouldn't count on it. Im as mean as a snake

Pickle must buy the beverage if he is to be accepted, then he can perform a couple of bar rituals, have a cigar stubbed out on his ass, down a pint of phlegm then Ill buy him a beer ;D

He then has to be interogated by Woopert and his phallic non lubed pace stick
I find that wrapping the top of the boots in clingfilm, sort of puttee style (the same method that you use with hamsters) prevents any unsightly cellulite overflow. ;)

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