Cadbury recalls over 1mil choccy bars!

Discussion in 'The Intelligence Cell' started by spike7451, Jun 23, 2006.

Welcome to the Army Rumour Service, ARRSE

The UK's largest and busiest UNofficial military website.

The heart of the site is the forum area, including:

  1. spike7451

    spike7451 RIP

  2. The possible contamination has been traced to a leaking pipe at Cadbury's Marlbrook plant in Herefordshire.

    Reported as drips this morning.

    Presumably the drips that maintain the factory as it was allegedly known about five months ago.

  3. Hmmmmm. Can anyone guess which choccy bars might appear in MoD ration packs in the not-too-distant future?
    Irradiate them with cobalt (used to sterlise food products) and flog them for a small fraction of their usual cost.

    Iranian Mars bar anyone?

    In the '70s there was a choccy bar called Bar Six containing nuts & raisins; anyone old enough to remember that? Bar Six got into the papers when someone found a hazelnut strangely chewy and removed it from their mouth to find it was a mouse's head, probably chucked in by a disgruntled choccy factory employee. Bar Six vanished from the shelves for ever. Six months later squaddies everywhere were delighed to find Bar Sixes were a regular feature in their 24 hour ration packs.
  4. Remember the Bar Sixes well. Never had a mouse head in mine. Thought it was a competition. I never win competitions.

    The Mars Bars on the Laughalot going down south in 84 were well past their sellbuy date and had a lovely marbled appearance.
    Don't know if they were bad as the food was shite and the beer was out of date as well and the videos. Don't ask!
    No toilets with a seaview so didn't see much of the scenery on the way down.

    So Cadbury's products soon coming to a rationpack near you soon, probably.
  5. Can they export it to America at a knock-down price? Perhaps it could be broken up and sprinkled into White House banquet McFlurrys?
  6. Life is like a box of chocolates - you never know what you're going to get. Forrest Gump in "Forrest Gump" (1994)

    Rings true.
    Ring's sore.
    Fcuking salmonella.
  7. If you look at the packaging it doesn't mention that it's chocolate. As I recall there isn't enough cocoa solids in for it to be called chocolate.
    Recalling Easter eggs? They are very popular at this time of year. They've sat on this for months, typical.
  8. Sitting on eggs is fairly typical but not Easter Eggs.

    They've known for five months (allegedly)
  9. "Sitting on eggs is fairly typical but not Easter Eggs." :D
    I hoped someone would notice!
  10. So something's hit the fan.

    And it isn't chocolate.
  11. Did anyone notice, you never actually saw the woman receiving the chocolates in the Milk Tray ad? She was probably about 50 stone with bed sores, varicose veins and riddled with salmonella. I reckon it was a different bloke each time, given a bogus photo, duped into thinking if he swung across a canyon and swam crocodile infested waters, he'd get a shag out of it. I did notice each time, just after he emerged from the fluttering net curtains, he looked well pissed off and the getaway was at breakneck speed.
  12. She fcuked him off.

    He only had the one nut crunch.
  13. But he was soft centered.
  14. In these days of sponsorship deals, viral ads and cross-media marketing, can this be a wicked publicity ploy by Cadburys in preparation for the release of a new salmonella flavoured bar? They're not allowed to smoke now on Coronation Street, so maybe they will all tuck in there before the general public are given the opportunity?
  15. But will we notice the difference?

    I hate sponsorship on TV and although I have an AXA endowment if you'll pardon me saying that.
    If that munter says she has an AXA pension one more time, I'll fcuking throw something.
    And cancel the endowment.