Burns Suppers

This year I have not been invited to a Burns Supper...aaaaah! No, not because of how I behaved last year before you ask. I would have been invited to one on Friday but I have a previous engagement.

So tonight I will be having a wee select gathering of me, TFB and the Fenianette where we will trough on the traditional foodstuffs and then toast the immortal memory. Which will be restrained, civilised and thus unlike 95% of the Burns Suppers across the land, nay world!

How will YOU be celebrating Burns night the night? I know of one complete maniac who is hosting an alternative do, in Dumfries of all places, to celebrate the immortal memory of William Macgonagall who he feels is a more worthy poetic muse. Mind you he is mad as a badger and will nae doot be bollixed by 1900 tonight...

I can still see him half naked, lasciviously cavorting with a lady in similar state of undress in a hotel, drunk to the wide while a gentle, kindly and perplexed elderly man tried to reason with him "Och come on laddie, think of what Rabbie Burns would think of your behaviour!" "Fully approve" came the riposte.
Just about sums up the po-faced southern pooftahs. English - FFS they don't even like themselves. :)

I think we're still a bit embarrassed by the fact that we gave the English throne to a Jock. Mind you, he did move to London thereby starting a trend that has been followed by our Scottish leaders ever since.

PS: Enjoy Burns' Night and try to keep the noise down after 10pm, some of us will be trying to sleep.
This year I had the choice of four, but am only attending the office one, which I am co-organising. Just putting the finishing touches to my address. I shall give the whisky tasting a miss, but am looking forward to being birled across the floor!

I rather like reading Macgonagall ..... :oops:

Have a good one everyone!

And to all those who think we are uncouth North of the Border, I quote Voltaire:

Nous nous tournons vers l'Ecosse pour trouver toutes nos idées sur la civilisation
Thought this was about the wife's cooking. Ho hum, so who is it we are meant to be celebrating.

Here's tae us -
Wha's like us -
Damn few -
And they're a' deid -
Mairs the pity!


I have also not been invited to the family Burns Supper this year but I fear that it may be due to some mild offense I caused at the last one.

See, the males in my dad's side of the family typically attend this event at some 'Lodge' in Motherwell. I don't know what the hell the 'Lodge' is specifically for, could be anything really, but it has a fairly angry atmosphere most of the time. I've only been once and that was last January. Kilt on, kit altogether - including obligatory Bell's in flask hidden in the sporran - and I head out with my old man (who doesn't drink) and the night is generally alright. Dinner is nice, the readings are pretty nifty and soon I'm fairly pished and happily gobbing off to my cousins in the corner.

At the end of the night we sing 'God Save the Queen' and about half way through, thanks to my alcohol consumption, I loudly protest and ask why we can't sing 'Flower of Scotland' since the Queen has fcuk all to do with Rabbie Burns and all that. People are looking at me angrily, I'm confused. Thankfully my sober father pulled me out of the room for the last half of the song and I came in and apologised to my uncle (who is the lodge member).

No invite this year...

What a ******* shame, eh?
Well I'd count your blessings you treacherous dawg. If they had invited you, you would have been checking your six every five minutes and wondering who the bloke with the axe and block was, that smiled sympathetically at you as you arrived and tunelessly whistled "Rule Britannia" as he sharpened it.


Kit Reviewer
Book Reviewer
Was quiet enough at home on itself, just Fang Jnr piping in the haggis and the Selkirk Grace.

Ah, but Friday night. A surprising good one held locally. There was the usual speeches, but also fiddles, the singing of many Burns songs, Highland Dancers (one of whom Fang Jnr seemed to be spending rather a lot of time with so definitely a successful night for him), nice waitresses who kept coming round and offering more helping of a rather nice Cockburns' haggis. And a couple of poems here and there.

Finished with a ceilidh into the small hours.
If you like Burns songs, can I recommend this?



Kit Reviewer
Book Reviewer
I bought it when it came out...it is the hound's rounds.
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