This year I have not been invited to a Burns Supper...aaaaah! No, not because of how I behaved last year before you ask. I would have been invited to one on Friday but I have a previous engagement. So tonight I will be having a wee select gathering of me, TFB and the Fenianette where we will trough on the traditional foodstuffs and then toast the immortal memory. Which will be restrained, civilised and thus unlike 95% of the Burns Suppers across the land, nay world! How will YOU be celebrating Burns night the night? I know of one complete maniac who is hosting an alternative do, in Dumfries of all places, to celebrate the immortal memory of William Macgonagall who he feels is a more worthy poetic muse. Mind you he is mad as a badger and will nae doot be bollixed by 1900 tonight... I can still see him half naked, lasciviously cavorting with a lady in similar state of undress in a hotel, drunk to the wide while a gentle, kindly and perplexed elderly man tried to reason with him "Och come on laddie, think of what Rabbie Burns would think of your behaviour!" "Fully approve" came the riposte.